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Daisy didn’t know how long she’d been crying, only that she was sure she should’ve run out of tears by now. But that wasn’t the case. From what it appeared, she had an unending supply, although some of them may have been provided by the copious amounts of wine she’d drunk.

‘I’ve really messed this up, really, really messed this up, haven’t I?’ she said to Bex. What she wanted was for her friend to say it was all okay. To tell her she’d made the right decision and she would see that in the morning, but she didn’t.

‘Claire is on her way,’ Bex said instead. ‘You know she’s better at giving advice on things like this than I am.’

So there it was – all the confirmation Daisy needed that she had well and truly messed up.

‘I should go and speak to him, shouldn’t I? I should tell him what happened, what my mum said. I should tell him I was an idiot, and that I don’t want anyone else, and I don’t – you know, I really don’t. Ezra asked for my number at yours, and I said I didn’t want to give it to him. All I could think about was how he would never be as perfect as Theo. Why am I such an idiot? Why did I act like this when I know Theo is the one I want to be with?’

‘Because you’re terrified of relationships and commitment,’ Bex said. ‘Because you stupidly let your mum amplify those fears and because you were worried he was going to hurt you in the long run, so you wanted to get there first because you?—’

‘Okay, I didn’t need the actual reasons,’ Daisy said, fearful of how long the list could go on. ‘I need to speak to him. I need to speak to him now.’

The urge to see Theo was greater than any she had ever felt, as if her body were physically being drawn across to the other side of the canal. And yet, as Daisy stood up, Bex followed and placed her hands on Daisy’s shoulders.

‘I don’t think that’s the best idea, given the state you’re in. Maybe you need to hang on a bit. Wait till tomorrow, wait till you’ve sobered up.’

‘Tomorrow? That means he’s going to spend another night thinking I don’t want to be with him. I do. I do want to be with him. That’s all I want.’

‘I get that,’ Bex said. ‘Maybe just telling him in a more measured manner might be a good idea.’ Her hands still hadn’t left Daisy’s shoulders and when Daisy glanced to the side, she noticed that Bex’s wine glass was still full. But just because Bex had drunk a bit less than Daisy, it didn’t mean she was right, did it?

Daisy could hear what her friend was saying, but Bex obviously didn’t understand. Daisy needed to do this now. She needed to put it right now. She needed to speak to Theo.

‘I’m going over there,’ she said, already grabbing her bag and heading for the door. ‘Tell Claire I won’t be long. I love you. Wish me luck.’

‘You’re sure?’ Bex said again, though Daisy responded with just a look. ‘Fine, good luck, but I really don’t think?—’

Whatever else it was she was going to say, Daisy didn’t hear. She didn’t need to. She was already out of the boat and heading to Theo’s.

77

Daisy couldn’t remember the towpath being so narrow before, but as she made her way towards Theo, she struggled to stay on the thin strip of tarmac and kept stumbling into the hedgerow. It was probably just the nerves making her dizzy, she reasoned. The nerves and perhaps a little bit of the wine, too. But she would be all right once she was aboard theNarrow Escape. She would be fine.

With her hand firmly on the handrail, she crossed over the canal at the lock and promptly hopped onto theNarrow Escape.

‘Theo! Theo!’ She hammered her fist against the door. ‘It’s me, Theo! I need to speak to you, please.’

She paused, straining to hear if there were any footsteps inside, but all her calls were met with silence. She readied her hand and hammered again.

‘Please, Theo, I know I screwed up. I just want to talk to you. Please, please, please listen to me. I’ve messed up. I can let myself in, you know, I’ve got a key.’ She started to rummage in her bag, only to remember she had given Theo his key back, along with all the belongings she’d packed up.

With a slight sigh, Daisy dropped back, rubbing her head momentarily before straightening up and beginning to knock again.

‘I’m not giving up, Theo. I’m not. I won’t stop knocking until you let me in. Can you speak to me, please? I need to speak to you.’

Daisy’s arm was already aching, and her knuckles were red from constantly rapping against the door, yet she couldn’t stop. If she did, he’d think she didn’t care, that she gave up too easily. She wasn’t going to let that happen. ‘I won’t give up, Theo, I won’t. I’ll stay here all night if I have to.’

She paused to catch her breath and was about to start knocking again when a voice spoke to her from behind.

‘If you carry on like that, you’re going to get a noise complaint, and it’s on my boat, so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t.’

Theo was standing a short way away, sunglasses on, Johnny’s lead held limply at his side as the dog wandered freely towards Daisy.

‘Theo, thank God.’ Relief billowed through her. ‘I’m so sorry. I need to talk to you. I have to talk to you.’

Theo didn’t move from where he was standing. ‘So I heard. You look like you’ve had a drink.’

‘Please, Theo, I made a mistake. I made a really horrible mistake. I need you to hear me out. I need you to forgive me. Please, Theo.’