Page 69

I miss you, too

26

Julian

I lie on myback in the dark, one arm bent under my head, the other resting across my chest. The room is silent except for the hum of the ceiling fan and the occasional creak of settling wood. Outside, the wind presses softly against the windows, rustling leaves. But it’s not the familiar white noise that’s keeping me up.

It’s her.

I can’t sleep

Me either

I’m strangely…proud of you. For earlier.

I read it twice, not sure exactly what she’s referring too, but still feeling happy at the sight of the affirmation.

Am I the first person you’ve opened up to like that?

Oh, that’s what she meant.

I close my eyes and breathe.

To this extent. Yeah

I can feel her thinking on the other side of the screen. I try to picture her, wondering if she’s curled up at the edge of the twin bed with the girls shoved in tight beside her, or if they shared one and she’s alone in the other. I wonder if she’s chewing the inside of her cheek like she does when she’s thinking hard.

Have you ever been in love?

Fuck.

She had to go and ruin it.

I swallow hard. For a second, my pulse picks up. I’ve been here before. With Naomi. I know this is how it always starts. Curious and innocent. Then they dig their nails in, break the skin, and start peeling back the layers. A million fucking questions. Needing to know more. And once they get to asking about the real me, I know it’s only a matter of time before it’s time for me to run.

I take a deep breath.

I don’t wanna run from her.

And that’s scary as hell.

How would I know if I’ve been in love?

…

It’s too much to type in a text.

I blink at the screen.

I expected it to be a simple answer.

I hesitate, then I type:

Come to my room and explain it to me

Now, she hesitates. Then:

I don’t wanna leave the girls alone tonight.