Page 74

“You need to take lessons from him on how to be,” Carla told Alan. “Wow.”

“I second that,” Renee mumbled.

I squeezed his hands but focused on Gerald. “Yes, they’re golden. They were apparent when I was younger, but then I hit some level of power and they changed. Only people with a high enough power level can see them. I don’t exactly understand it since clearly it’s a quirk of my mother’s bloodline.”

He nodded that he should let it go, but I could see the questions swirling in his eyes.

Yeah, he could fucking get in line. Way,waybehind me.

“I spied on them and my stepmother until I got proof and confronted her.” I pulled my hand away from Ha-joon again to wipe tears. “I’m not sure anything ever hurt that much because I had truly loved her. She was the light that kept me going in that hellish coven with my monstrous father leading them all.”

“She was good to you?” Mrs. Clark pushed when I went quiet.

“Yes,” I rasped. “She was a doting mother. Diligent with my schooling. Some thought it was because it seemed I would be theonly child—everyone remembering the problems with my birth and being early. While Father tried to blame her, even the most sexist of the coven elders would bring up his curse and that he should be grateful he had such a smart, talented child.

“She was—I got the best of everything. She sat in on classes to make sure no one was sexist or demeaning to me. All of it. I was—she—” I broke down crying for the girl I’d been. I’d only told a few people of this, one being Amanda Hope who had saved me after I’d run and been on my own for too long. The world had almost eaten me and would have without her.

It was Mrs. Clark of all people who was hugging and comforting me. She’d taken Alan’s spot and was mothering me.

“You are such a good lass and she saw that. She realized she couldn’t stay detached and being a mother wasn’t about blood but love. You are worthy of love, my girl,” she comforted, whispering more and more kind words as I got myself together.

I nodded my head and focused on getting the rest out so I could just go home and rest. I wasn’t going to get any work done and it was better to let them handle the cleanup.

I wasn’t going to be of any use in it. It was better to admit that instead of making a mess for someone else.

“I was already having doubts because the guy was stupid. Like a fucking idiot and the deal was for him to take over the coven because there was no chance of a female coven leader hundreds of years ago. There are a handful even now and they’re from ridiculously powerful families. Most think it’s just a stunt.”

“But I heard you were to be the first,” Mrs. Clark pushed.

“That was later,” I sighed, scrubbing my neck again. “Long story short, I guilted my stepmother to help me blow it up and get me more time to settle with things after being lied to for so long. She owed me at least that, especially when I was thinking of what was best for the coven. She realized I was serious andwe staged something with the elders to show the guy was truly a fucking moron.

“The whole thing fell apart fast, and unfortunately they used it to humiliate Father. He went ballistic later and then called me a useless bastard. That was how webothfound out he knew. He would threaten to switch us out if I didn’t behave and marry whoever he quickly found next to clean up the mess—yeah, it was all a mess.

“But she got him to see that it was a small mess now instead of a huge mess later that he would have been trapped into. And if he ever fucking listened to us about anything, we could have gone to him instead of the elders who were the ones who embarrassed him. A miracle happened and he actually listened to reason.

“He was consumed with finding a better match for me and putting in more time, even publicly accepting the elders’ chastising. He said he was short-sighted to prioritize thinking of the glory for the coven instead of the true benefits the match would bring. He came out looking like a better leader and… At least it only got me one real beating. He’d never hit me before and then…”

I shook my head, comforted when Ha-joon kissed my hair.

“I’m so sorry, my sweet kimchi,” he murmured in my ear.

“She nursed me the whole time I healed,” I rasped. “She apologized again and again for me being hurt but not what else she did. I think in her mind she still saw being raised a coven leader’s daughter instead of a maid’s a blessing and didn’t understand what she’d really done. To her, maids were raped all of the time and at least this was useful and my mother protected after.”

“She was twisted by her own fears and how you’ve seen so many vampires be brainwashed,” Renee muttered. “Youcan’t forgive it—it’s unforgivable. But you better than most understand it.”

“Now. It’s taken alongtime to get here.” I sighed. “She also was too selfish with it all. She could act like it helped me too, but it was all for her real daughter. She might have loved me who she raised and knew better, but when it came down to it, she picked that fucking cunt. Again and again. She always will.”

“Yes, well, not to excuse her, but a mother can only—” Mrs. Clark started to say.

I said the words that I knew would shut her up and maybe pour some salt she deserved in her current wounds. It was mean because she’d been comforting me and was there to help.

But I did it for Ha-joon.

“Even after my sister tried to kill me.”

18

Ha-joon