Page 93

Story: Electricity

My stomach was in knots by the time lunch came around. Had I brought my own lunch? No. And the pink card that got me free lunches wouldn’t let me leave the cafeteria again. Maybe Sarah would let me have some of hers.

I caught up to her by the gates and we hugged like we hadn’t seen each other in days and then walked out to the fields together. None of her classes overlapped with Ryan’s because of their age difference, so this was her only chance to see him during the day, even if he was busy. He trotted over to us once we’d sat down in the bleachers, like some kind of golden stallion, kissed her, nodded to me, and proceeded to be generally cool until Coach Griffon yelled at him to get back to work.

Where oh where was Danny? I leaned forward while Sarah chatted, scanning the field.

There was a thundering coming down the bleachers behind us and both Sarah and I squealed in surprise turning to find him looming.

“Hey,” he said. He was bigger than I remembered in daylight, and standing one step up made him huge.

“Hey,” I said back weakly. Why had I sent him that picture? I could see him remembering it in his mind. “I came out to watch.”

“I’ll try to put on a good show then,” he said, with a slow steady smile, then bounded down onto the field, running across to join the other players.

Sarah waited until he was out of earshot. “I thought you were here for Liam, not Danny?”

“I am!” I protested, too hard, too fast. She squinted at me like I was guilty.

Nothing happened during lunch. Balls were thrown, batted, caught, players ran all over the field, and Coach shouted a lot, but not a single one of them sent a revealing text. I listened to Sarah half-way, the other half-of-me waiting for a telling electronic transmission. I tried to watch who Danny hung out with—if I was wrong about Mason, I couldn’t get close to every member of the baseball team before prom, there just wasn’t time. But even on the field, I could tell Mason was almost Danny’s—I don’t know—puppy? Danny would make exclamations and Mason couldn’t help himself but to shout, “Yeah!” afterwards, as though the words had come from his own mouth, and I could tell from the way he looked at Danny how eager he was to follow.

I knew it was what it looked like, because once upon an embarrassing time in middle school, I’d felt that way about Sarah.

At the end of lunch hour, I hugged Sarah and walked away slowly, heading back to linger outside the gym, hopefully someplace I wouldn’t be seen, but where I could listen in if anyone said anything. It was hard to look nonchalant. Must’ve been easier back in the day when kids were allowed to smoke.

Then the guys were inside, I heard their voices echoing up the hall. There was a lot of cement between me and them, and Darius and I hadn’t tested that out yet, but a shower of sparks came through—ZB checks, GPS checks, and?—

Another trailer trash whore?

Can’t help it if she wants the D.

Then this time, share the P after she gets drunk.

Wants the D—the Danny?

Or…the dick.

My empty stomach roiled but I waited another thirty seconds in case there was anything else. When there wasn’t, I practically ran down the hall.

I was super on time to chemistry, the first person in the class, and Ms. Goodman smiled at my eagerness to learn. I gave her a brittle smile back, trying to ignore the taste of stomach acid inside my mouth.

When Liam walked in, freshly showered, he made a beeline for me. “Saw you in the bleachers at lunch.”

“Why didn’t you come say hi?”

“Because.” The look he gave me then—it was as confused as I felt. “I can’t figure you out, Jessie.”

“Um—okay?”

“Like—do—you want to study? Or not?” He seemed unsure, and even a little mad.

“Yeah. When?”

“Tonight? I’ll come get you after practice.”

“Sure,” I agreed, and watched him walk back to his seat behind me.

Liam walked away after class without further explanation, and I willed myself to ignore the bus ride home by texting Lacey.

How’s your mom today?