Page 81
Story: Designed for Disaster
“That wasn’t for you to do.”
“I understand that now. But at the time, all I saw was an opportunity to salvage what might have been a relationship between you and your mom. Youknowhow much family means to me. I didn’t want you to lose out on the chance to have the kind of time with your mom that I’d do anything to have with mine.”
That knocked a tiny bit of the wind out of my sails. Ididknow what family meant to her—and the idea that my mom could have used that to trick her didn’t seem entirely far-fetched.
“I thought I might be able to help you reconnect,” Natasha continued. “That’s all I was trying to accomplish. So no,” she continued, glaring at me. “Ididn’tsell you out. I didn’t tradesecrets for money. Or do whatever the hell else you imagine I did.”
“Am I imaginingthis?” I said, gesturing to Jimmy and the massive bruise up the side of his face. Even if I could admit that my mom might have been lying about paying Natasha off, Jimmy’s state wasn’t something I was going to let go.
Natasha shook her head, giving me a scornful look. “Don’t be ridiculous, Trent. I didn’t hurt your brother. And the fact that you even contemplated that is insulting. After Jimmy heard about Nana Dee, he tried to hitchhike into the city and got himself robbed and beat up in the process.”
My heart beat in my throat at that news, my gaze landing on my brother. What the fuck?
“He was stranded and called me to ask for help,” Natasha said. “I borrowed my neighbor’s car so I could go pick him up. Then I brought him here.” She threw her arms out. “So now you know everything. Okay? Exactly as it happened. I didn’t betray you, Trent. But you betrayed me. You believed lies about me without even attempting to ask me for my side of the story.”
I held on to enough self-control to keep from wincing, even as her words hit the mark.
“You assumed the worst of me,” Natasha said, taking a step back. “And you used that as an excuse to burn my life to the ground.Again.”
“I didn’t burn anything to the ground.”
“I’ve gotten fired twice because of you, Trent. And sure, maybe the job at the coffeehouse wasn’t the greatest, but Saunders Furniture…I was really happy there.” She looked at me, her eyeshaunted. “This morning, I had a job I loved, and a guy I…well, a guy I thought cared about me, if nothing else. And now it’s all gone. You took it all away, just like that. I trusted you, and you ripped the rug out from under my feet.” I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about her parents, her ex, the stories she’d told me. “So, like I said before, consider me gone. And this time, I won’t come back.”
With that, Natasha climbed into her neighbor’s car and drove away.
I watched her disappear from the lot, feeling like I’d run a marathon today. When I glanced back at Jimmy, I saw something I’d never seen before. Jimmy was shaking his head at me, his eyes filled with disappointment, like for the first time ever, I’d let him down.
25
NATASHA
“Leave me alone!” I complained as the incessant pounding on my front door carried on. It sounded like a herd of bulls was attempting to break through. Stacy was deceptively strong.
“I’m not going to go away,” she yelled through the door. I flopped back over on the couch, stuffing a pillow against my head, hoping to drown her out. It didn’t work. She’d been going at it for five minutes straight, and I couldn’t tell if the pounding in my head was my own heartbeat or the echo of her knocking.
“C’mon, Tasha!”
“No!” I called.
“Natashhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaa!”
“Ugh, god!” I got to my feet, wrapped in my comforter like I was about to brave a winter storm. I could feel the achy, sticky mess of mascara under my eyes from crying so hard, but I didn’t care enough to clean myself up. I stumbled to the door, heaving thecomforter up over myself so I didn’t trip over it. “What do you want, Stacy?”
“You can’t wallow alone. You need the solidarity of female friendships right now.”
I rolled my eyes. What I really needed was to be left alone to wallow in a heap on the couch. I was good at wallowing.
“You need someone to talk to!” Stacy insisted. “Someone to bitch and complain to. I’m that person. Now let me in.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” It was bad enough when I’d texted her about what happened, reliving every nasty thing Trent had said.
“Are you really going to make me stand out here?” Stacy said, changing tactics. “It’s cold. And I’m small. So,sosmall, Natasha.”
I peered through the peephole. She wasn’t wearing her coat. It was almost November, for crying out loud. What was with her and Jimmy? “You have a perfectly nice, well-heated apartment to be in,” I said. “You don’t have to be cold.”
Stacy hammered on the door, and I jumped back. “Let me in,” she said. “I’m really not leaving until you do.”
“Stacy—”
“I understand that now. But at the time, all I saw was an opportunity to salvage what might have been a relationship between you and your mom. Youknowhow much family means to me. I didn’t want you to lose out on the chance to have the kind of time with your mom that I’d do anything to have with mine.”
That knocked a tiny bit of the wind out of my sails. Ididknow what family meant to her—and the idea that my mom could have used that to trick her didn’t seem entirely far-fetched.
“I thought I might be able to help you reconnect,” Natasha continued. “That’s all I was trying to accomplish. So no,” she continued, glaring at me. “Ididn’tsell you out. I didn’t tradesecrets for money. Or do whatever the hell else you imagine I did.”
“Am I imaginingthis?” I said, gesturing to Jimmy and the massive bruise up the side of his face. Even if I could admit that my mom might have been lying about paying Natasha off, Jimmy’s state wasn’t something I was going to let go.
Natasha shook her head, giving me a scornful look. “Don’t be ridiculous, Trent. I didn’t hurt your brother. And the fact that you even contemplated that is insulting. After Jimmy heard about Nana Dee, he tried to hitchhike into the city and got himself robbed and beat up in the process.”
My heart beat in my throat at that news, my gaze landing on my brother. What the fuck?
“He was stranded and called me to ask for help,” Natasha said. “I borrowed my neighbor’s car so I could go pick him up. Then I brought him here.” She threw her arms out. “So now you know everything. Okay? Exactly as it happened. I didn’t betray you, Trent. But you betrayed me. You believed lies about me without even attempting to ask me for my side of the story.”
I held on to enough self-control to keep from wincing, even as her words hit the mark.
“You assumed the worst of me,” Natasha said, taking a step back. “And you used that as an excuse to burn my life to the ground.Again.”
“I didn’t burn anything to the ground.”
“I’ve gotten fired twice because of you, Trent. And sure, maybe the job at the coffeehouse wasn’t the greatest, but Saunders Furniture…I was really happy there.” She looked at me, her eyeshaunted. “This morning, I had a job I loved, and a guy I…well, a guy I thought cared about me, if nothing else. And now it’s all gone. You took it all away, just like that. I trusted you, and you ripped the rug out from under my feet.” I couldn’t stop myself from thinking about her parents, her ex, the stories she’d told me. “So, like I said before, consider me gone. And this time, I won’t come back.”
With that, Natasha climbed into her neighbor’s car and drove away.
I watched her disappear from the lot, feeling like I’d run a marathon today. When I glanced back at Jimmy, I saw something I’d never seen before. Jimmy was shaking his head at me, his eyes filled with disappointment, like for the first time ever, I’d let him down.
25
NATASHA
“Leave me alone!” I complained as the incessant pounding on my front door carried on. It sounded like a herd of bulls was attempting to break through. Stacy was deceptively strong.
“I’m not going to go away,” she yelled through the door. I flopped back over on the couch, stuffing a pillow against my head, hoping to drown her out. It didn’t work. She’d been going at it for five minutes straight, and I couldn’t tell if the pounding in my head was my own heartbeat or the echo of her knocking.
“C’mon, Tasha!”
“No!” I called.
“Natashhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaa!”
“Ugh, god!” I got to my feet, wrapped in my comforter like I was about to brave a winter storm. I could feel the achy, sticky mess of mascara under my eyes from crying so hard, but I didn’t care enough to clean myself up. I stumbled to the door, heaving thecomforter up over myself so I didn’t trip over it. “What do you want, Stacy?”
“You can’t wallow alone. You need the solidarity of female friendships right now.”
I rolled my eyes. What I really needed was to be left alone to wallow in a heap on the couch. I was good at wallowing.
“You need someone to talk to!” Stacy insisted. “Someone to bitch and complain to. I’m that person. Now let me in.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.” It was bad enough when I’d texted her about what happened, reliving every nasty thing Trent had said.
“Are you really going to make me stand out here?” Stacy said, changing tactics. “It’s cold. And I’m small. So,sosmall, Natasha.”
I peered through the peephole. She wasn’t wearing her coat. It was almost November, for crying out loud. What was with her and Jimmy? “You have a perfectly nice, well-heated apartment to be in,” I said. “You don’t have to be cold.”
Stacy hammered on the door, and I jumped back. “Let me in,” she said. “I’m really not leaving until you do.”
“Stacy—”
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