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I CAN EXPLAIN

ANNA

Baby Caleb looked grumpy, with bubbly pink cheeks and a fixed glare in his big dark eyes. I gushed and cooed at the pictures of him sitting on his dad’s old bike with sunglasses and cap. His first time in the zoo with his stoic dad which made me smile seeing him hold the pink and blue baby bag and Caleb in other arm, his chubby fingers clutching his dad’s tee and giving a shy smile to the person who took the picture.

“That was when Olivia said you looked very handsome,” Cillian said fondly as we peered from the couch towards the coffee table where the album was spread open. “You asked her if you looked as handsome as me.”

“And what did Mom say?” Caleb asked, his hand squeezing mine, my smile growing as Cillian replied.

“She said you’re more handsome than me. That’s why you’re blushing,” Cillian pointed to baby Caleb in the photo and his pink cheeks.

Blush crept up Caleb’s cheek as he murmured something underneath his breath, making me giggle and kiss his flustered cheeks. “You looked adorable as a kid,” I said, his fingers rubbing a pattern on my knuckles.

“He still does,” Kyle whispered to us, my chest warm with them sitting on either side of me.

Cillian told us about the time Caleb peed in his bed when he was a kid to his first bruise on his knee from riding a bicycle and his first day at school. He cried all night the day before but looked angry when his parents dropped him to the school. His eyes were so red and swollen that the teacher had asked him if he had any allergies, and young Caleb had replied with a straight face, “I am allergic to children.”

We all chuckled, and Cillian told us to go through them, and Emma had an evil grin as she snatched an album to go through his pictures. I smiled at their friendship and went to help Cillian in the kitchen with the dessert.

We were quiet, slicing the blueberry cheesecake as laughter from the living room echoed into the kitchen.

“You have a lovely house,” I said, wondering how lovely it had been for Caleb to grow up there and run around the hallway to the backyard with the pool.

“Thank you,” he replied, his voice deep. “I regret not looking after him when Olivia…” he sighed, and that sigh was of a parent. I knew that sigh well. I had sighed like that when Aaron got in trouble at school or when Alice got stubborn. It was a sigh that meant we, as parents, didn’t know what or how to talk to our children.

“Sean, my friend, and my mom looked after him when I was away for work,” he explained as we kept the slices in small plates with a chrome dessert spoon.

“That must have been hard on you. Not being able to see him grow up,” I said, because I would feel like a terrible mother not being able to see my kids while I worked all the time.

“It was,” he looked at me and continued, “I can never make up for the time lost, but I’m glad he has you. And Kyle.”

Oh.

I blinked and nodded when he looked away and said, “Although I still don’t understand how you can have a relationship with two people at once, but all that matters is that all three of you are happy and content with it.”

I swallowed, looking at Caleb and Kyle in the living room. Emma was grinning, Caleb was glaring at her, and Kyle had a small smile playing on his lips as he watched them banter, his hand on Caleb’s back. I liked them both. More than like.

“I rejected Caleb and Kyle for two weeks, but Caleb was stubborn and showed up at my door with flowers every single day.”

“He gets it from his dad, I’m afraid,” Cillian said with a sly smirk, making me chuckle.

“I eventually accepted his offer for a date and… here we are.”

“I haven’t seen him smile or talk that much,” Cillian said, looking in the living room. “He’s charming but quiet. He never had many friends, and Anna, I hope you know he’s serious about this. When he was dating Emma, he never told me he had a girlfriend.”

I pursed my lips and asked, “Do you know why they broke up?” Emma was very attractive, and they looked like they had good chemistry, so why did they break up?

Cillian turned towards me, his brow raised. “He didn’t tell you?”

I shook my head. “He said he a made a mistake he still regrets, and she broke up with him.”

He sighed and massaged his temple. “I’m sorry. He can be stubborn, and he wants to maintain his good image in front of you two. You should ask him what he did.”

I took a deep breath and nodded. What did he do that his dad couldn’t tell me? Was it a huge mistake? But if it was huge, and he regretted it, then why had Emma forgiven him? It didn’t look like they had bad blood between them.

“And Anna, you can call me if he ever fucks up. I’ll straighten him out,” Cillian said, picking up the tray full of blueberry cheesecake and walking out of the kitchen.