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I need something to drown my thoughts.
Even though I’m surrounded by people at the bar, I couldn’t feel lonelier.
I’ve been so busy with Enzo that I’ve barely taken the time to meet anyone else, and I know Lilly won’t want to see me either, given how I’ve ignored her all week when she messaged me to meet.
I’ve dug myself into a hole, and I don’t know how to climb out of it.
And the worst part is, it isn’t even surprising.
Growing up, I was always the girl in my friend group who let herself be consumed by her relationships. In high school, it was my very first boyfriend. Later, it was Liam.
I got so caught up with the idea of being in love that I forgot about everything else.
With Enzo, I’ve started to do the same, even though there is no promise of a commitment from his side.
The bartender brings over my drink, and I quickly gulp it down.
What am I doing with Enzo?
It’s like I’ve completely forgotten what my end goal is. The reason I even came onto this trip was to further my brand, but the more time I spent together with him, the more I lost track of my goal.
This Italy trip has done so much for my brand already. I’ve gained thousands of new followers, and yet, instead of trying to network with the other influencers to tap into their audience, I’ve been spending every waking second with Enzo instead.
And for what? For him to act like he doesn’t even know me around other people?
If he wanted to claim you, he’d do that in front of his children. He’s told you how much their opinions matters to him.
I take another swig of my drink, tormented by the possibility of Enzo being embarrassed by me. The preppy little influencer from abroad.
Of course, he doesn’t want his kids to know.
I’m not usually one for self-pity, but today I seem to be drowning in it. So much for an amazing trip away.
There’s a tap on my shoulder, and I turn around to find Alessio standing there.
“I hope I didn’t disturb you.”
“Oh, um, it’s fine,” I manage to squeak out.
He’s the last person I want to be dealing with right now.
“I dropped by the hotel to deliver some papers, but I was hoping I’d run into you.” He smiles, oblivious. “Dad totally butted in our conversation earlier. He’s like that sometimes—always focused on work, and never the fun.”
I shift uncomfortably in my seat.
If only he knew.
“Is there something you had to tell me?” I try steering the conversation back to work.
“Depends. Would you want to listen?”
“Alessio….”
“Nah, I get that I’m a bit on the young side. I can see the hesitance from your side. But you don’t know what you’re missing until you try.’
I’ve met men like him before. It’s like they can never take the hint that you’re not interested, always in pursuit of the next girl.
For a brief moment, I wonder if he gets this from his father.