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He removed his hand from hers, gripping the railing.“Our COP was located in the eastern part of the region, very strategic.We had mountains on all sides for surveillance.Just down the road, maybe five clicks, was the village of Kushan Deh.They supplied us with fresh produce, and in return, we protected them.We had a translator who lived in the village.His name was Samiullah Rahimi, and I made friends with his son, Farid.Cute kid—about eight years old at the time.Big brown eyes, a crazy smile.He’d come to the base with his dad sometimes, delivering food or information, and we’d kick around a soccer ball.”
He swallowed again.
“Hunter and his MSOB group got word of a potential Taliban visit to the village and knew that some high-level Taliban leader would be with them, so he and his team deployed to capture the HVT—high value target.We were tasked with backup and possible engagement.”
He shook his head.“It went south almost immediately.It was dark out and the villagers had fled to their homes, but a few of the local men had stayed to fight the Taliban, so it was a mess.We didn’t know who was from the village and who was Taliban.Sami was trying to get to us to help identify the insurgents, but...”
Declan closed his eyes.“It was...chaos.And in that chaos, Sami was killed.”
She wanted to put her hand on his then, but he pressed his hand to his mouth as if reliving that moment.
He gripped the railing.“Friendly fire.”He looked at her.“Me.I didn’t recognize him in the darkness, and I panicked.I thought he was Taliban.”
Now she did touch his hand, wrapped her fingers around his on the railing.“How could you know?”
He nodded.“That’s what the inquiry decided too.”He glanced at her then, and even in the fading sunlight, his expression betrayed an inner haunting.“I destroyed their lives.”
She had nothing.
“And the Taliban took the village.So there was nothing I could do.They executed the men and did terrible things to the women—even killed a few of them too.It wasn’t long after that that the brass shut down the COP and moved us to a larger FOB.”He glanced at her.“I lost track of Farid, although I kept asking about him even after my tour ended.”
He turned his back to the sea, leaned against the rail, crossing his arms over his chest.“He finally landed on the radar with a refugee group that fled the area.His mother had died a few years earlier, and he ended up at an NGO in Kabul.In a fluke of fate, which I’d call providence, one of our translators reached out to me after Farid asked for me.”
“When was this?”
“About ten years ago.I had just sold MapGrid Solutions and was looking at where else I wanted to go.I ended up heading back to Afghanistan and wrangling through the legal work to sponsor him and bring him to America as an orphan refugee.One of my former Marine buddies took him in as a foster child.”
“Wow.”
“I just...I couldn’t live with my mistake.”He glanced at her.“He’s now in college at MIT.So smart.Has a girlfriend.”He offered a grim smile.“But I’ll never get out of my head that moment when I realized I’d shattered his world.”
Oh, Dec.
Guilt.Thatwas his terrible secret.She stepped in front of him and reached for his hands.Met his gaze.“It was a mistake.And you made it right.You need to forgive yourself.”
One side of his mouth tweaked up.“Trying.”
“Maybe you need to swim with the sharks.”She winked.“The potential of being eaten sort of shakes away the voices.”
He laughed, something small, warm.Then his blue eyes met hers.
Oh.His gaze heated through her.“You’re good for me, Austen,” he said softly.“I wanted to tell you before, but...”
She raised an eyebrow.
“Hiring you made it complicated.”
She swallowed, studying his face.“I don’t...I don’t work for you anymore.”
He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, let his hand rest there, cradling her face.“No.No, you don’t.”
He took a step toward her, and she didn’t move, just lifted her head.
His eyes searched hers, landing on her lips.
And this time Stein wasn’t here to stop her.“Yes,” she whispered.
He bent to kiss her?—