Page 126
Story: A Soul to Protect
Memories she didn’t want, things she hated, flashed behind her clenching eyes as she rocked. Disgusting sounds mixed in with the many from the wonderful night she just had, and scents and touches that once burned at her skin, did so again.
Her flesh itched, as if the liquid was trying to seep into her like needles.
Tears began to squeeze past her clenched eyelids, and they fell fast and with heavy drops.Stop it. I enjoyed it. It’s not the same. They aren’t the same.Yet, no matter how much she told herself the truth, she just felt sick. Everything felt wrong. In her heart, regret swelled, and her lips trembled.
Why?!She cried to herself, not understanding why she was having this reaction.W-what’s wrong with me? W-why can’t I just be normal?! I don’t want to feel like this – like my skin is crawling, like my own pussy feels wrong.Even her breasts felt too heavy from being touched too much, highlighting that theyexisted.
Why am I broken?She thought she was ready!
She’d been able to touch Nathair’s cocks without feeling like she wanted to expire or disappear afterwards. She hadn’t been faced with sinking regret, fear, or anxiety.
So why now? Why after the amazing night they shared?
She lifted her head with stark eyes.Where are my clothes?She wanted to cover herself, so she felt safe again. They were the only barriers she had, the only things she could wear to protect herself, even if they could be torn away.
Even if it didn’t truly matter.
She caught movement to her left and didn’t even realise Nathair had awoken or wasn’t in a trance until then. She’d thought he’d been out of it, giving her time to freak out alone. Knowing he was there, conscious, only made fear like she hadn’t felt in weeks choke her.
When he came into view, she sobbed and flinched away from him as if she’d been struck.Please don’t hurt me. Don’t pull my hair.Her scalp tingled in preparation for a harsh yank in order to try and assert dominance over her tears, to try and get her to stop panicking – which only ever worsened her fretting.
“I-I-I’m sorry,” she stuttered through hiccupping heaves. “I’ll stop crying.”
Refusing to unfurl herself, she let out a loud cry when he touched her. He scooped his arms around her body and lifted her off the ground.
Oh no. Where is he taking me?All she could do was tremble and let him do what he wanted.
Nathair lifted her above his head when he slithered into the water to stop her from going under. He settled her in the warm water gently to let it caress her skin, to let itcleanher. It did nothing to loosen her fright-filled muscles.
She noticed he dipped down until all that remain above the surface was his skull, and bubbles formed around his gills.Is he hiding from my scent?
Guilt only made her tears fall faster, and made her heave harder.
Nathair brought her to the ledge she’d kissed him, had reached for him,beggedfor him. Now she clung to the glowing crystals to get away, and was thankful when he let her go. She turned her head away as tears dripped on the ledge, and she brought her knees up when her belly just wouldn’t stop quivering.
“I’m sorry,” she sobbed around distressed hiccups. “I’m sorry.”
She wished she had an answer for him, or that she could make herself feel better. That she could explain she didn’t blame him, even if she couldn’t stand the sight of him right then, even if his touch currently felt like it had set her skin on fire – and he’d touched hereverywhere.
Just as she went to apologise again, he covered her mouth to stop her. Old habits burst into her, and she bit into his palm as hard as she could, only to flinch when she expected a reaction. She got one; he patted the top of her head in a single stroke.
She shuffled to get away from it, although thankful that was what she received.
For a long while, she clutched the ledge while trying to deal with her own body, her reaction. Being in his presence worsened it, but there was little they could do.
She doubted she’d be able to take a single breath and hold it to get to the other side of the underwater tunnel. She thought she may have preferred the darkness, rather than to be seen in the light like this.
Slowly her breaths calmed enough that she didn’t feel like she was about to spit out her lungs. She refused to lower her bent legs, wanting to keep her feet shielding her privates, but her muscles did begin to unlock. She wished the knot in her stomach would unravel, but she couldn’t do it with all the soreness she felt.
Looking for a way out, she finally braved talking to him.
“N-Nathair,” she croaked with a sniffle.
He gave her a grunt in answer. God! He was probably watching her freak out. Was he pitying her? Judging her? Angry with her?
“C-can you heal me,please?” she asked, and immediately noted a blue flicker in her peripheral vision before it faded.
She wanted everything to go away. She wanted to feel normal again, like nothing happened so she couldbreathe.
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