Page 32 of You Rock My World
DORIAN
On Saturday, I wake up restless. An entire weekend ahead, and I can’t see Josie either day because of Billie. We can only video chat.
“Morning,” she rasps, still groggy.
“Morning, beautiful,” I drawl. “Looking cozy.”
Her nose scrunches adorably. “Look who’s talking. Is that bedhead I see?”
I run a hand through my mussed hair. “I am in bed, so technically, yes.”
“Don’t say you’re in bed with that husky voice.” She groans. “Please tell me at least you have your shirt on.”
I dip the camera to show her my bare collarbones. “Err…”
“Oi.” She theatrically puts a hand over her face, only to peer between her fingers. “Don’t assault me first thing in the morning with all that sexy ink.”
I bring the screen back up. “I thought looking wasn’t against the rules.”
“Should I leave my camera on when I go shower, then?”
I drop the phone on my chest and bite my fist.
“Hello?” she calls. “I’m seeing black.”
“As you deserve”—I right the screen and glare into the camera—“after putting that image in my brain.”
She grins. Goofy, unguarded, radiant. “Hey, I was only demonstrating the unfairness of subjecting me to extremely tempting skin art.”
“Noted,” I say pointedly. “Join me for breakfast? Virtually, of course.”
“You want to watch me cut the crusts off my toast? You’re weird, but okay.”
I’d watch her clip her toenails if it meant spending more time together.
“What are you having?” she asks.
I glance at the breakfast tray resting on the mattress, holding a parfait of non-fat Greek yogurt, homemade protein granola, and mixed berries, alongside a glass of grapefruit juice. “My nutritionist is in cahoots with the chef so nothing wild.” I show her the parfait.
She bites her lip in that maddening way, but her expression is serious like she’s unsure what to say next. “Do you watch your weight, or—I’m not judging if you do but…”
“No, I don’t. Not really. It doesn’t help that whenever I put on a quarter of a pound, the press declares I’ve got a beer belly.
But it’s more a healthy thing.” I mix the parfait before eating a spoonful.
“After getting out of the relationship with Billie, I’m trying to follow a more balanced lifestyle. ”
“Makes sense.” She nods. “Lily is my veggie police. She makes no distinctions between Penny and me.”
“Should I tell your sister about the vending-machine purse?”
Josie points a finger at me. “Don’t you dare.”
She props her phone against something as she makes coffee and butters toast. I wedge the phone between my bent knees and eat my yogurt as we chat.
“What are you doing today?” I ask.
“Whine on the couch all day about not being able to see you?” Josie shrugs. “You?”
“Same.” I lick off the spoon. “This may sound paranoid, but can I ask you to do something for me?”
She sips her coffee, scrunching her face. “I have no idea what you’re about to ask.”
“Nothing terrible. But I’d like you to bring your car to a shop and have them install darkened windows. If it’s okay, I’ll arrange everything.”
“Why?”
“If Billie has someone watching the house, it’s the only way your car can come and go from my place without anyone knowing if you’re in it.” I take a sip of juice. “Otherwise, if the rest of the team leaves and you stay behind, they’d notice.”
Josie pulls a face. Good, bad? I can’t tell.
“Too much?” I ask.
She shifts in her seat. “Can I make a confession?”
“Sure.”
“All this spy-movieness is turning me on. Not the Billie thing, of course. But the sneaking around is hot.”
I smile. “Do I get extra points if I start using code names?”
“You don’t need extra points.” Josie turns shyer as she adds, “You’ve been back in my life only for a week, and I don’t know how I survived the last year without you.”
“Spotify?” I joke despite the heat flaring in my chest.
Her face gets emotional before she crumples, laughing. “You have no idea.” Her eyes get shiny and she does that rapid blinking thing. I can’t tell if she’s about to joy-cry or just-cry. “It’s so accurate, it’s not even funny.”
“I know.” I sigh. “Let me arrange with the auto-shop. I’ll send you the details.”
She toys with the neckline of her sweatshirt, letting it drop off one shoulder. “So it’s definitely camera off during the shower?”
I fix the camera and sing a line from one of my songs.
“Your breath on my skin leaves scars.”
Her eyes go saucer wide, and her blush is glorious even through the screen. “That’s—that’s below the belt.”
“Blame the muse.” I use my “seduction voice,” as she calls it. “She’s very inspirational.”
“Alright, I’m off to, uh… cool down. Talk later. Byyyeee.”
She hangs up before I can reply. I toss the phone aside and sling an arm over my eyes, unable to stop grinning.
Mid-afternoon, she sends me a picture of her standing in front of her car with newly tinted windows at the repair shop. She’s in a silly bodyguard pose despite her milkmaid dress: dark shades on, arms crossed over her chest, serious expression.
I trace her silhouette on the screen and am even jealous of the mechanic who must’ve taken the picture.
As I stare at the image, my heart turns into a glowing flare that sputters out too fast as I remember why she’s there. This isn’t the life I want for her—sneaking around, looking over her shoulder, hiding behind tinted glass. She deserves better.
But I’d do anything to keep her safe, to allow us to be together.
Dorian
Totally badass, Monroe
Josie
I know. *cool emoji* Try not to swoon
Too late.
* * *
Later that night, I’m in my home recording studio. I’m still working, refusing to let the day be a total waste. I’m half-heartedly composing the chorus for a new song when my phone pings.
Josie
Want to play a game?
A thrill crawls up the back of my neck, making the short hair stand to attention.
Dorian
Sure
Josie
Are you in bed?
I rush out of the studio and take the stairs two at a time, launching myself over the mattress.
Dorian
Am now
Josie
Did you run? You sound winded
I grin. Always with the sass.
Dorian
How can a text sound winded?
Josie
Sixth sense
Dorian
What’s the game?
Josie
If I were in bed with you and you could look and talk but not touch, what would you do?
Ah. Fuck. I’d probably lose my mind and beg. How do I reply? She has no mercy.
Dorian
Should we play on a call?
Josie
No, I’m too shy. I can only handle texts
Dorian
Nothing about this game seems shy to me
Josie
Trust me
Just spill, what would you do?
I have to think. What would make Josie lose it? How can I torture her back? My gaze lands on my nightstand and a slow grin spreads on my lips.
Dorian
I’d grab a fantasy paperback from my nightstand and read a fight scene aloud to you using my *seduction voice*
I’d make the gore sound particularly dirty and bring the hero’s sword thrusts to life so vividly, you’d feel each one
I hit send and, two seconds later, my phone rings.
I smile as I pick up. “I thought we weren’t playing on the phone.”
“You have a devious mind.” Josie sounds parched. “I have a request.”
“What request?”
“Would you—would you read me a bedtime story?”
“Let me guess, are we going for fantasy?”
“I believe I was promised a fight scene.”
“What about me? Don’t I get to ask a ‘what would you do’ question?”
“You will tomorrow night. Now read, please?”
I grab the book I was in the middle of, go back a few chapters, and, setting my voice extra low and coarse, I start reading.
“Cassian didn’t much care for mud, but the battlefield seemed determined to drown him in it.
Thick and sucking , it clung to his boots like a jealous lover, slowing every step.
He twisted his blade free of a gutted enemy, ignoring the wet sound it made, and stepped over the body, directly into more muck . ”
Josie groans on the line. “Oh my gosh, this sounds sooo dirty.”
“Should I stop?”
“No, please, I’m already invested in this Cassian character. Go on.”
I continue, “The sludge made every movement treacherous , but Cassian moved with practiced efficiency.
His sword found purchase in throats, bellies, and hearts with grim regularity.
He navigated the carnage, more inconvenienced than disturbed, his boots squelching with each step.
Once, he nearly slipped on a severed arm, its fingers still twitching as if unwilling to accept their new situation.
“Still there?” I check on Josie.
“Yep.” She yawns. “And I’m never falling asleep without a bedtime story from you again.”
“Ah, enjoying yourself?”
“I’m so turned on, it’s embarrassing. Is Cassian hot?”
“Dark, unruly hair, piercing blue eyes…”
She sighs. “Reminds me of someone. Keep reading…”
I resume from where I left off, taking my voice an octave lower.
“Cassian brought his blade up in an arc, the point slicing through his attacker’s abdomen.
Blood sprayed, warm and sticky, across his face .
He wiped it with the back of his hand, smearing it into the grime already caked there.
‘Charming,’ he sputtered. ‘Really, this day just keeps getting better…’”
I keep reading without pause for an hour before checking again on her. “Josie, are you still there?”
She doesn’t reply.
I close the book in my lap and listen to the soft, rhythmic sound of her breathing through the line.
“Goodnight, love,” I whisper, knowing she won’t hear me, and hang up with a smile.
Maybe today wasn’t so useless after all.
* * *
The next day, I make it only until eight thirty before sending my evening text to Josie. We’ve been on multiple phone calls during the day, but this is the moment I’ve been looking forward to the most.
Dorian
Want to play a game?
Josie
You’re in bed already?
Dorian
There are other places we can play
Josie
*heart-on-fire emoji* color me intrigued
Dorian
What would you do if I told you I’ve never wanted anything as much as I want you?
I’d meant to be playful, but my brain went from zero to a hundred in less than a heartbeat.
Josie
I’d swoon
In fact, I’m swooning…
I live alone, this game is getting dangerous
If I face-plant in my living room, no one is going to find me for days
Dorian
I’d come find you *wink emoji*
Josie
You’re making me swoon again
Is that your question?
Is the game over?
Dorian
No
That was a warm-up, here’s the actual question:
What would you do if I asked you to pick something in your apartment and pretend it’s me?
The dots signaling she’s typing blink and blink until I’m bursting with impatience. When her reply comes in, it’s a mile long. I eagerly scan the text, each word stoking the fire burning low in my spine.
Josie
I’d pick up the bottle of wine I left out on the counter earlier.
First, I’d let my fingers slide around its neck, gripping it firmly just below the lip as I pop the cork with my thumb.
Then, I’d lift it, watching the dark liquid swirl through the glass.
Bringing it close, I’d let the cool rim brush against my bottom lip long enough to inhale the earthy flavor.
Then, I’d take a slow sip, directly from the bottle, letting the rich, velvety red coat my tongue.
I’d hold it there, savoring every bit of the warmth as it spreads.
When I finally swallowed, I’d set the bottle back down, dragging a finger along the rim to catch the drop that tried to escape.
And then, well… I’d stare at it, wishing it was something—or someone—else entirely
Fuck. Oh, fuck. I drop my phone and push both my hands through my hair, pulling at the roots until a new notification pings in.
Josie
How’d I do?
Dorian
How you did?
I might never recover
Are you happy?
Josie
*smug-face emoji* so dramatic
Dorian
Is there any of that wine left?
I need a drink
Josie
I can check if you want
Take another sip
Tell you about it in detail?
Dorian
Please, don’t
Nearly didn’t survive the first text
Can’t take another one
Josie
You’re no fun
Dorian
And you are all heart
Josie
I try
Dorian
Try harder
Josie
Hey, shouldn’t that be my line?
Dorian
Trust me, baby, after I print that text, frame it, and put it on my nightstand you’ll never need to tell me to try harder at anything
Josie
You called me baby, then put sexy visuals in my mind, and now my brain’s mushed and I can’t fight back
Dorian
Truce?
Josie
Yeah
I can’t wait to see you tomorrow, this has been the longest weekend of my life
Dorian
Me too
Want me to read to you again before bed?
Josie
Would you? Really?
I was joking yesterday, you don’t have to do it every night
Dorian
I wouldn’t mind if it became an every-night thing. Honestly, I’d look forward to it more than you would
Josie
You make it hard to say no
Dorian
Easy pun there, Monroe, but I’m not gonna breach the truce
Josie
As long as no one’s breaching
I chuckle but don’t take the bait.
Dorian
Call me when you’re under the covers
Josie
Aye aye *military salute emoji*
I put the phone down and pace the room to shake off the restless energy buzzing under my skin. She’ll call any second, and somehow that makes me feel like I’ve got everything and nothing under control.