Page 51

CHAPTER

TWENTY-FOUR

CLARA JUNE

“So glad we aren’t taking the damn bus back tonight,” Tanner says, sawing through a thick, birthday cake flavored waffle.

It’s even got sprinkles and whipped cream.

Goode’s has the best waffles, and this morning, since I had to work really early, Dean brought the boys here before school so the five of us could eat together.

It’s a busy day, and aside from the game tonight, I won’t see the boys again really until tomorrow. I’m grateful he did this.

“I am, too. I’m so glad the school pulled through with hotel rooms. Last year I was up for hours with a nervous belly, watching the news, scared to death something would happen.

” I bite into my blueberry waffle, and practice the fine art of chewing and swallowing before I speak.

One day my offspring will learn this, I’m certain.

“I wasn’t the only one. There was a phone chain of nervous parents. ”

Dean dunks his fork into maple syrup and I notice that Archie is eating his the same way.

Instead of dumping an entire bottle of syrup onto his waffle, he's dipping each bite into a little bowl. I want to smile, and watch them forever, but my break is fifteen minutes, and we’ve got more ground to cover.

Busy moms don’t have time for long sentimental moments mid-brunch shift.

“Absolutely no drinking in the hotel room,” I warn Tanner, pointing the tines of my empty fork at him.

Beneath the table, Dean’s palm slides over my thigh, and he gives me a little squeeze.

“I’ll be giving that speech in a few hours, too,” he tells me, then turns to Tanner.

“But you’re the quarterback, sophomore or not.

You have to lead by example. Make sure everyone is respectful of the hotel room, no fires, no alcohol, no theft, no trying to take things that are bolted down. "

Tanner arches an eyebrow. “Is that something you’re worried about? Us trying to steal bolted down items?”

Dean stabs a piece of pineapple from the dish of fruit centering the table. “A bunch of boys together results in feats of strength tests, and bolted down TVs have more than once been the victim. I don’t think you will, but I have to say it.”

Tanner stretches into the vinyl booth, pushing his plate away. “I know the drill. I won’t do anything dumb. Plus,” he says, his eyes darting toward me. “You’re gonna be there.”

“I’m comin’, too!” Archie offers, syrup resting in the corners of his mouth.

I know what Tanner means, and I give him a look only a mom can give. “It shouldn’t take me staying in the same hotel to make you behave.”

Rawley laughs. “Yeah, but it does.”

I turn my focus to Rawley. “Jake and Riley are allowing you to spend the night, so you better be on your best behavior, too. Hands to yourself, everything above the blanket.”

His cheeks flush, but once when Jo Jo was over, they were watching a movie on the couch and the room went suspiciously still when I passed through to the kitchen.

Young love is sweet, young love is passion and all consuming, and I get it.

And, I love Jo Jo like my own. But I’m not looking to add “grandma” to my list of titles at age thirty-seven, you know?

“I know,” he says, embarrassment briefly coloring his features.

“You excited to sleepover in the hotel room?” Dean asks Archie, reaching across the table to help him cut through a particularly tough piece of sausage. He passes the fork back to Arch, and I find myself putting my hand on his thigh, giving Dean a loving squeeze.

And it is a loving squeeze, because I’m in the terrifying and wonderful position of loving Dean McAllister.

The idea of him not loving me back, or the idea of him loving us all just for a season—it shakes me to my core.

I can’t even think about it. So I eat pancakes, and plan the day and evening with the boys, and force myself to ignore the fast-growing, vehement, engrossing love burning in my chest for Dean.

When the first tears fall, I swipe them away, hoping that Archie doesn’t notice. He outed my broken box. He’ll surely out my tears.

But then, as Tanner throws across the field, strong arm extended, nailing a pass to his receiver that has the entire stadium whooshing in awe, more tears fall. As the away side of the stadium roars my son’s name, cheers him on, claps at his every beautiful play, the tears don’t stop.

I don’t know why I’m so emotional. I guess when Tanner got hurt, I worried for him more than I even realized.

I worried he’d lose a future he’d already invested so much love into, and I worried that he’d be unhappy and feel lost. And now that he’s healed and better, back to doing what makes him feel the best, I find myself inexplicably happy.

Archie’s hand slides into mine as he shouts and whoops happily for his older brother, one of his two heroes and best friends. “Mama, did you see that? Tanner ran so fast! He scored again!” he says, extending a finger to the field, pointing right at Tanner’s jersey.

Just then, I take my phone out, snapping a few photos.

First of the scoreboard, then of Tanner on the sideline, profile exposed as he squirts water into his mouth, helmet tipped upward.

I send them to Rawley, then I send him a picture of Archie, his cheeks painted with blue and gold, giving a double thumbs up.

Miss you! Tanner’s doing great. Hope you guys are having fun!

I don’t expect him to message back, but he does.

Rawley

Awesome. We’re watching on cable access. Tell Tanman he’s killing it.

Will do. Love you R.

Love you too

After shoving my phone away and making another swipe at my watery eyes, my gaze catches on Dean. And as if he senses me, he turns, looking big even though he’s far away on the sideline. His eyes sparkle, and he casts me a wink before giving Archie an adorable little wave.

Then it hits me.

Not another wave of tears, but why I’m so teary.

Everyone is happy, including me. And we’re not just happy, but excited for the future.

Excited for what’s in store. And I feel comfortable in a way I haven’t ever felt.

I don’t compare Dean to Troy, because that’s like comparing a stand-up man to a rusty thumbtack.

But I can’t help but note that Troy never gave me comfort, or brought me solace.

I made all the choices, with little to no input or help.

Even talking with Dean over pancakes, having him reiterate rules and speak to the importance of following rules, it felt like we were in it together. Togetherness brings me comfort, and that’s something only a healthy relationship can give.

I’ve wanted that mental and emotional security for so long.

With happiness and a fleece blanket keeping me warm, Archie and I cheer our hearts out until the timer buzzes, and the scoreboard tells us what we already knew: Bluebell rules, and Tanner’s future is bright.

“Are you sure?” I look between Hudson and Dolly, who came up for the game with their kids. They’re all too young to play football, but the Gray family supports all things Bluebell, including the high school.

Bear and Archie continue with their secret handshake, neither of which can truly remember the steps. There’s a lot of hand slapping, and the occasional spin, and tons of giggles.

Dolly tips her head against Hudson’s chest, rubbing her burgeoning belly. No matter when I see Dolly, she’s either pregnant or has just had a baby. At least, it feels that way, despite the fact they’ve only got three kids.

“We’re so sure. We got adjoining rooms, too, so there’s just one internal door between us if they need anything.” She waggles her eyebrows at the boys. “Have you guys ever slept in a king sized bed?”

The boys immediately begin discussing what being a king must be like, and after a moment, they take turns knighting one another.

“Can I at least pay you for half of the room?” I offer, but Hudson shakes his head, as if he won’t even consider it.

“No, Clara June, you aren’t paying us. Bear’s been begging us to let Archie sleepover, and since we’re already all here, why not make it extra special and let them have a hotel room sleepover?

” He smiles and presses a kiss to Dolly’s temple.

“We’ll walk him back to your room after breakfast in the morning. Text Dolly your room number.”

I pass Archie’s small overnight bag to Dolly, then send her a text, telling her I’m on the fifth floor in room 508. Archie gives me a kiss goodbye, and moments later, Tanner appears, wrapping his sweaty body around mine in an excited hug.

“Mom,” he breathes, still out of breath from the post-win commotion on the field. “Did you see that last touchdown? One-handed catch in tight coverage?” He smirks. “It was awesome.”

“I saw, you were incredible. Seriously, Tanner, I’m so proud of you,” I tell him honestly, fighting the emotional cramp creeping up my chest. If I start crying now, he’ll be so annoyed and I wouldn’t blame him.

I change gears, because while I was in awe of him, I also worried about how he was feeling.

“How’s your head? Sore? What about your collarbone and shoulder?

Is anything overworked? Are you icing here even though it's an away game?”

Tanner laughs, clapping a hand on my shoulder. “I’m okay, mom. I mean, I’m sore, but I’m gonna go ice for 30 minutes, then the buses are going to the hotel. There’s a spa, and coach said we could use it, so I’m gonna soak and binge on pizza then go to bed.”

I believe him, because he’s given me no reason not to. I kiss his slippery cheek. “Good. Don’t forget the Tylenol, though. Do you need me to text you and remind you?”

He shakes his head.

“What floor is the team on?” I ask, wanting to know if we’re on the same floor. I’d like that, but I’m sure Tanner wouldn’t.

“Three.” He collects a high five from a student passing through the crowded field, and tips his head at another kid who says his name, then tells him good game. “What floor are you and Dean on? What room?”

Mentally, I stumble back. “We’re not staying in the same room.”

Tanner’s forehead rumples with confusion. “Why not?” His face morphs from questioning to happy, and I turn to see Dean approaching, the stadium lights and cowboy hat combo casting shadows over his face, making my chest flutter.

“Hi there, mama,” Dean greets me, tipping his hat back and holding it there as he bends down, placing a kiss first on my lips, then one on my cheek, right in front of Tanner.

And Tanner, when my eyes veer to him, has no reaction. “Coach, what room are you guys in?”

Dean takes my hand in his, and my insides go electrical, a spark of desire sweeping through every inch of me. “We’re in 509.” His hand is warm and so much bigger than mine, and the feel of him at my side again is almost dizzying.

“I’m in 508,” I explain, confused.

Dean looks between myself and Tanner. “We have 508 and 509. They’re adjoining,” he explains. “Archie’s got his own room, and me and Mama have ours,” he says simply.

Tanner nods. “Cool.” He faces me again. “Okay, gotta ice. The weight room here isn’t open much longer.”

Dean shakes Tanner’s hand. “Proud of you out there tonight, kid.” I can feel Tanner’s smile in my chest. He gives me a kiss on the cheek, and jogs off, disappearing into the sea of sweaty football players.

Dean links our other hands together, bringing our bodies flush. He kisses the end of my nose. “I hope you don’t mind I did that, you know, with our rooms.” He looks around us, but keeps me rightly pressed to him. “Where’s Arch?”

“He’s sleeping in Bear’s room, with Dolly and Hudson. They got adjoining rooms, too.”

Dean’s eyes flash with something sinister, and desire blooms in my groin, making my stomach clench. “So we have a hotel room, just me and you, for the entire night? Am I hearing that right? And we don’t gotta worry about Arch hearin’ us?”

I almost faint at the reality of it all. That’s how much I want him. I lick my lips and push to my toes to get my mouth closer to his ear. “You’ve been so good to me. Maybe tonight I can be good to you, too.”

The night he draped his dick over my face, letting his orgasm pour into my mouth without being able to actually lay my eyes on him—I think of that moment on the field, I think of having more than that. Having him inside me. Having all that cum oozing out of me instead of dripping off of me.

All he does is wink, then tell me we’re gonna go say hi to some folks then get some late dinner. And I go with him, only partially tuned into the people he introduces me to, more excited to hear him call me his girlfriend than anything.

Then it’s just me and Dean in his truck, heading for the hotel.

The engine is quiet, and the radio is off.

He slides his hand across the seat and finds my thigh.

“How about we order room service?” he suggests, his dark eyes traversing my body before coming to meet my gaze.

“I want you in that room all to myself for as long as possible.”