Page 44 of Wrangled and Tangled (Raven Peak Ranch #1)

I love you, Spencer.

His words play on repeat in my head as a tear escapes his golden eyes. He’s looking at me as if I hold everything in his whole world at my fingertips.

“You love…” choking on the last word, I have to swallow down my disbelief.

“Yeah. I love you, you fucking idiot,” he throws his hands up and continues, “or maybe I’m the real idiot.”

“No,” I stop him, “you aren’t, but I can’t ask you to give up your career. I won’t have that on my shoulders.”

He scoffs and shakes his head, “You’re a real piece of work. I just told you I love you, and you still can’t help but sabotage what we have.”

“I–” I start but stop when he holds his hands up in front of his chest.

“No more excuses, Spence. When you’re ready to admit how you feel about me,” he pauses to wipe the tears from under his eyes, “call me.”

With his last words, he disappears behind his trailer, and my heart plummets to my feet. Standing there like an asshole, I wait and wait for what feels like forever…

But he doesn’t return.

When I finally snap myself out of it, I head home, and sit down on the couch and stare at the wall.

He loves me.

He loves me, and he was ready to give up rodeo.

Am I ready to be everything for someone else?

The thought puts my hair on end. I promised to be everything for Pearl, but I failed.

I may be a halfway decent father, but I was an absent partner.

I loved Pearl with everything I had, but I was always too focused on being a provider that I didn’t give her everything she deserved before we lost her.

I’ve never regretted anything in my life as much as I still, to this day, regret that.

Tears pour down my face, and I release a frustrated breath.

Briar’s losing another person she cares about.

Because of me.

I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here before Briar flops down beside me after returning from her shift at the diner. She’s in much better spirits since we talked about what happened at Clara’s and set some new rules.

“Where’s Heath?” She asks, looking around the room as if he’s going to pop out from my room any second with his dazzling smile.

“He left,” I sigh, knowing this conversation has to happen sooner or later.

“What do you mean, he left?” She tips her head to the side and leans back. “Left to go where?”

“He was cleared, and the rodeo’s back on. They’re on the way to their next stop on tour.” I need to rip the band-aid off, tell her the truth, and move on. I know it’s going to hurt, and that’s what kills me more than anything.

“And you didn’t want to go with him?” She asks, eyeing me like I’ve grown an extra head.

“That’s not an option. I have a whole life here, with you, plus the Ranch and Garage. I can’t just up and leave.”

“Well, then make him come back,” she demands.

“He’s not coming back, Flower,” I tell her with as much softness as I can muster.

She laughs, “Ha ha, bad joke, Dad.”

“It’s not a joke,” swallowing down the lump in my throat, I watch as her eyes start to well and turn red when she realizes I’m serious. “He’s gone back to the rodeo.”

“But, you love him,” she demands, wiping her eyes, “and he loves you. Did you ask him why? What if I called him–”

“Flower,” I sigh, “love isn’t a reason to stay.”

“Yes, it is!” She shouts, standing from the couch and backing away. Thelma scrambles out of the way before she trips, and Briar twists her head. “Love is the only reason to stay!”

“I know you’re upset,” I start.

“No! You’re not going to give up like this! Y’all are in love damn it!” She’s screaming, throwing her hands in the air, and pacing the floor. “Call him, call him right now, and tell him to turn around!”

Her words tug at the last thing Heath said to me.

When you’re ready to admit how you feel about me, call me.

But I can’t derail his whole life for my happiness. I did that once already when I convinced Pearl we could be a happy family, and though I have a beautifully happy daughter, I won’t push anyone else into something because of what I want, ever again.

“Call him,” she demands again, as if I didn’t hear her the first time. “Tell him you love him.”

“I can’t do that, Flower.”

“You can!” She cries, tears falling down her face. “I love him too! You’re not allowed to push him away!”

With her last words, what’s left of my heart shatters. Pausing to gather my thoughts, I allow her the space to say what she needs. When she’s done talking a mile a minute, I stand, scooping her up into my arms and holding her while she cries.

“I’m not pushing him away,” I tell her, “I’m letting him go.”

“But what if he doesn’t come back?” She sobs, looking up at me with her identical green eyes.

“That’s the price of love, Flower.”