Page 43 of Wrangled and Tangled (Raven Peak Ranch #1)

D riving away from Spencer and Briar felt like leaving a piece of my soul.

Ripping myself in half and driving away, the most important half of me is still there, haunting the house.

Laying in bed alone, in my trailer that I haven’t been in for weeks, depressing thoughts of Spencer replay in my mind.

His smile.

His steady heartbeat in my ear.

I miss it. The calmness of sharing a bed with him, the confidence in what we were building together. Tossed to the side over one stupid fucking comment. He didn’t even give me a chance, nor did he give me a reason to stay.

He didn't stop me from leaving.

Eddie’s bunked down not too far from me, and there’s no way I’m getting any sleep now, so I get up and make my way over to his trailer.

Knocking on his door reminds me of opening the door and finding Spencer on the other side of it. The first night we both felt a shift in our relationship.

Eddie answers in a t-shirt and boxers. I didn’t even look at the time, “Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize it was so late. I’ll just go.”

“Come on, Muffin,” he says with a yawn, “I figured this was comin’.”

My best friend lets me rant in his trailer for however long it takes until I’m calm enough to hear him when he tells me to rest and go back to Spencer tomorrow.

“He didn’t stop me, Eddie!” I shout, pulling at my hair.

“He was already feelin’ things he was scared to talk about,” Eddie argues. “You told me he assumed you were comin’ back to the rodeo without talkin’ to him. You didn’t set him straight. Instead, you asked him to give you a reason to stay.”

“He didn’t, though,” I whisper.

“Heath, he told you upfront he wasn’t lookin’ for complicated, and if he heard what you said at the press conference, what Staci told you to say, that sounds like a complication to me.

Take the night, think long and hard about what makes you happy, then go from there.

And Heath,” he says, stalling before his bedroom door.

“Make sure you fight tooth and nail, I’ve never seen you happier or more miserable over anyone like this. ”

“He doesn’t want me,” I confess, but I’m hoping I’m wrong. I’m hoping that maybe, just fucking maybe , Spencer feels some of what I’m feeling right now, and when I show up at his house tomorrow, he gives me the reason I asked for.

Laying down on Eddie’s couch, I look up at the ceiling, hand over my hammering heart, wishing I were looking at stars with the man I’ve fallen in love with.

***

Eddie helps me pack up our gear, we’re headed to the next stop about five hours from here. If we leave soon, we’ll be able to compete in the last event. The rodeo commissioner called me personally to tell me he’s looking forward to my return.

I didn’t get the warm and fuzzy feelings I’m used to at hearing his enthusiasm over my return. Possibly because my heart’s slowly decaying in my chest, and I still haven’t called Spencer.

I don’t think he’d answer even if I did, so I’ve been busying myself while I work up the courage to go over there and beg one last time.

“Incoming,” Eddie mutters, nodding to the rest of the crew and telling them to find someplace else to be. Looking up, I watch them walk away and turn, finding Spencer with his hands in his back pockets, standing at my truck.

My heart leaps as if it knows where it belongs and can’t wait to return.

“Got a minute?” He asks with a crooked smile.

“Only a few,” I snip, feeling the same hurt and frustration from yesterday rising.

“I’m sorry,” he says, “I shouldn’t have gotten upset with you about Briar. You were only helping, and I was… jealous that she called you.”

I scoff, tossing my hair back out of my face and turning back toward my trailer. “Okay.”

“Heath, I should have asked you about the interview,” he blurts, “I shouldn’t have assumed. I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, you said that already,” I remind him, picking up the last box of equipment I need and stuffing it into my trailer.

“So, you are leavin’ then?” He asks, watching me lock up the trailer.

“I’m a rodeo cowboy, remember?”

“I thought,” he starts, running a hand through his hair, pausing for a moment. “I thought we–”

“I thought so too, Spencer. But then, you couldn’t give me a reason to stay, I asked you.

Begged you, and you didn’t even hear me.

You were so set on words that I was told to say, by the way, that you couldn’t even give me the benefit of the doubt.

” I pause, wondering if I should even bother telling him this, and choose to throw the ball in his court as I say, “After that press release, I told Staci I was done with rodeo. She nearly tore my head off, but I didn’t give a shit because I knew what I wanted. ”

He opens his mouth to respond, but nothing comes out.

Shoving past him, I double-check that everything is in the truck and stew in my feelings. Trying to keep what Eddie said in the back of my mind. He wasn’t looking for complications, I know that, but if he would ask me to stay, I would.

I wanted him to ask. I’ve been fucking living with him for the past however many weeks, I wanted him to want me enough to tell me to stay.

“You weren’t comin’ back?” His eyes widen, and he steps in front of me. “You were gonna quit rodeo?”

Looking up at the sky, licking my bottom lip, I have to fight to keep my frustrated tears from falling. “I love you, Spencer. Of course I was going to quit.”