Page 75 of Worse Fates

“I’m one of your people?” Ramy’s smile is slow, but wide.

Grabbing hold of Kai’s shoulders, I pull him into a fierce hug. He follows willingly, and holds back just as hard. I try to push all my love and apologies into this one gesture, hoping he’ll understand.

Body part, by body part, Kai relaxes. Rigid shoulders yield, taunt arms unravel and his stiff neck loosens.

“I couldn’t handle what was happening,” Kai, quiet and small, says into my hair. “And Ramy had to go clean up that bloody wreck. And Rurik is a bastard but he was…nice, okay? He kept checking in on me, and getting me warm drinks. Then when he hugged me it was just…for half a second the world wasn’t drenched in blood—it made sense. And the two times we had sex I felt a little bit more like myself again.”

“Dude, you did it twice?” I haven't even done it once.

“Mate!”

“Sorry.” I hug him harder. “And yeah it was scary. I thought…you weren’t awake when I woke up and I thought…”

“Yeah,” he breathes, the weight of it blowing my curls away from my neck. “Oi, Ramy. C’mon,” Kai says, soft but expectant, a big brother calling his siblings in for dinner.

“Oh, sorry…let me just, erm.” Ramy inches closer—arms up like he’s defusing a bomb instead of joining a group hug.

My fist darts out, grabbing his black t-shirt and tugging him forward, so he can awkwardly drape his arms over our shoulders.

Neither Kai or me care, our arms go around Ramy’s back and squeeze hard.

“Dude, what we went through was awful,” I say to Kai. “And I hate that you got hurt. I know I didn’t want you coming with me in the first place, but I also think I’d be lost without you, too. But if you’ve gotta leave once they take out these blood mages, I’m never going to be anything but grateful. You're my best friend, Kai. You look out for everyone else and I failed in looking out for you. But never again, alright?”

“Golden is right, Kai. Once the blood mages are dealt with, you can leave,” Ramy tells him. “We’ve been friends for a short time, but I’ve never had a fiercer one. I don’t want you getting hurt.”

Kai detangles from our embrace and drops onto the sofa, we follow suit and sit so he’s sandwiched between us.

“I’m sticking around. I can’t just up and leave you two.” Kai’s head drops back, and he gazes at the ceiling.

I’ve been friends with Kai most of my life—but when something has lasted that long, it can be cherished or taken for granted. Jace’s beatings didn’t only affect me, but Kai, too. And not just watching me go back to him time and time again. We used to see each other or talk every day, but when I started leaving, days would go by without a word. Weeks. This time it was months.

Kai thought Jace had killed me. And then he thought he’d killed me again last night. He’s also got his own shit going on, when was the last time he told me about the tattoos he was designing for clients? Or he ranted about his stupid little brothers?

I can’t let our friendship be one sided, I love him after all.

“I’m sorry, Kai.” My hand goes to his knee. “I really am.”

Kai glances at me and after a pause, smiles. “Don’t look so sad, Golden. We’re good. Promise.”

Lips pulling up, I roll into his side and cuddle into him. “Ramy, you gotta join our group hug again.”

Ramy chuckles, cheeks a little pink, and joins. A little smoother this time.

“So…” I begin.

Kai waves a hand. “Mate, just ask.”

“Was he good?” I blurt.

Kai grins. “We sucked each other off then fucked. It was great.”

Annoyingly, heat warms my cheeks. “That’s good…”

Ramy pats my leg. “You're so cute, Golden.”

“You haven’t sucked Lucero off yet?” Kai asks.

“He hasn’t….” my knee begins to bounce, “he hasn’t asked.”