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Chapter Sixteen

Talia

K nocking on the door to Drayton’s office, I bounce up and down on my feet, anxiously waiting for an answer.

Drayton and Alaric disappeared earlier after the talk on the porch and nobody’s seen either of them since.

Penn said this only happens when some bad shit is going on in the pack or against the pack.

When neither of them showed up for dinner, I decided to put together a couple plates and bring them some.

Now that I’m here, though, I’m freaking out that this is exactly the wrong thing to be doing.

Maybe they can’t be disturbed and I’m going to make them angry.

I don’t know the etiquette when it comes to stuff like this.

Is it kind?

Is it annoying?

Is it rude?

I honestly don’t know.

The door opens suddenly, pulling me out of my thoughts.

I put on a smile to try and hide my uncertainty.

Drayton stands in the open doorway, his black hair in disarray and his blue eyes half shut.

Concern for him floods me, my magic jumping out of my skin at the emotion and scanning him from head to toe.

My magic can’t find much wrong with him aside from some stress that won’t budge, even with the warmth of my magic nudging it.

Sighing, I step forward and look up into his tired eyes.

“Hi. I, ah, brought you and Alaric some food since we didn’t see you guys at dinner. I was worried about you both,” I murmur softly, holding the two plates in my hands between us.

“I didn’t want you guys to get hungry.”

“Thanks, beautiful. Alaric left to take care of some pack business a couple hours ago, though. I’m afraid it’s just me in here,” Drayton answers, brushing a finger down my cheek.

“Why don’t you come in? You can keep me company while I eat this delicious food you brought.”

“Okay.” Following closely behind him, I ease the door shut after he takes both plates of food from my hands.

His office is large, yet dark.

It’s almost like a cozy cave with only one window that’s completely covered in dark red curtains.

His desk is massive, sitting in the middle of the room with a wall of TV’s on one side, and a bunch of cabinets on the other.

There’s a seating area off to the right, along the same wall as all the televisions.

It has a leather couch and a plush carpet, with a solid, low table in front of the couch.

Dray heads to the couch, placing the plates on the table and patting the seat beside him on the couch.

Once I’m seated, he wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me into him, burying his face in my hair.

Without saying a word, he breathes in deeply, his exhale afterwards tickling the side of my neck.

In between my legs tingles, my body becoming flush from the simple movement.

“I missed you,” I whisper to him, trying to take my mind off of the strange, distracting feelings flooding my body.

“Are you okay? You disappeared and when you didn’t come back out, I got worried about you.”

Drayton pulls back to look at me, brushing some hair behind my ear.

“Yeah, I’m okay. We have a pack member that’s been instigating a rebellion within the pack recently. We’ve been trying to quietly snuff it out, but he’s taken it outside the pack now which is something we can’t deal with quietly anymore. We’re trying to move as quickly as possible to do damage control with the other shifter packs, as well as get the evidence together to finally exile him.”

“Is it Marcus?” I ask, hoping I remembered the name correctly from a few weeks ago.

Helen and Penn both hinted that he was doing stuff like this to try and upend Drayton from his role as alpha.

“Yeah, it is. How did you know? Did he approach you?” Drayton is all business, his eyes drilling into mine, the sweet, snugly mate from before replaced with pack alpha in an instant.

“No. No, no, no. Helen and Penn were telling me about the history there,” I explain, wincing at the next part, knowing it will make Drayton uncomfortable.

“Penn started explaining to me why Forrester may reject the mate bond between us and why he’s calling you a murderer. They told me about Forrester’s mom and your dad, and the type of people they were. Marcus came up because Helen believes he’s trying to follow in his sister’s footsteps to get rid… of you.”

“That makes sense. I’m glad they told you. Did Forrester also talk to you about me?” Drayton shifts a bit, pulling more away from me and turning to the food.

He doesn’t make eye contact as he takes off the tinfoil and dives into the stuffed chicken casserole.

Placing a hand on his thigh, I squeeze softly, letting him know without words that I understand how hard this is.

“He did. I reminded him in no uncertain terms that I know who you are, I’ve seen how you act, and I don’t believe you to be the murderer he claims you are.”

“But I am. I killed my father and took his place as alpha,” Drayton says without emotion, like he’s reciting facts about someone else.

“That constitutes a murderer, does it not?”

“I want you to look me in the eyes and tell me why you killed him?” I say, dropping to my knees off the couch and forcing myself into his space.

Drayton looks down at me, his blue eyes red and solemn.

“I killed him because— because if I didn’t, he was going to kill me and then Forrester. He wanted the Forntida pack to cease existing and was ready to destroy myself, Forrester, and light the packlands on fire to do it. He was spouting off so many crazy things, so when he came at me with a dagger, I shifted and killed him.”

My magic flares inside of me at the pain in his voice.

Drayton is so strong, but the emotional scars he’s holding onto are weakening who he should be.

My natural instincts to soothe away the sting of his pain have me reaching towards him.

“And you think that makes you a cold-blooded murderer? Or do you think it makes you a saviour?” I ask, pushing up and placing both of my hands on his face as my magic flares at my fingertips.

“Because I think it makes you a saviour. Sometimes an old chapter needs to end so that a new one can begin. You didn’t end a life for your own benefit, you ended a threat to your life, Forrester’s life, and your pack.”

“Is killing in defense not still just killing?” Drayton whispers, so much self-doubt and self-deprecation in his tone.

“If you look at everything as black and white, yes. The world isn’t black and white, though. Everywhere you look is a blinding landscape of colour. Life is far too complex to look at things in such a rigid way.”

Drayton smiles a small, sad lopsided smirk that doesn’t touch his eyes.

“Maybe one day I can see the colours that you do.”

Looking down for a moment, I gather the courage to tell him a bit more of my own story.

Sharing my own vulnerability with him so he knows that he isn’t alone.

“Living in the cell, I saw so much of the bad parts of life that I questioned whether there even was any good in the world. When you only see and hear so much, it’s easy to get lost in the idea that there’s nothing else out there. My peryton was a big reason that I didn’t fully fall into that ideology. Lying with her in the valley, I would lean on her strength and love, reminding myself that something as pure as her couldn’t exist in a world of only evil.” I smile up at Drayton, letting my own glow come forward for my peryton.

“She cuddled me through the worst of the experiments. She set me straight when I would get far too deep in my own head. She showed me that colours are everywhere, you just need to shine some light to chase away the shadows.”

“I’d like to meet her someday.” Drayton tips my head back, brushing his nose lightly against mine as his breath whispers against my lips.

“Thank you for trusting me.”

A noise escapes my throat, it was supposed to be some semblance of words, but both my brain and my mouth are short-circuiting right now.

Drayton’s hand slides in my hair, lightly tangling in the teal locks at the back of my head.

My breathing grows rapid, those tingling feelings from earlier flooding me from head to toe.

The parts of me that still bear the reminders of my time in captivity cause me to pause for a moment.

Is this something I should do?

Is it what I truly want?

Yes immediately floods my mind, the feeling of the mate bond and my own magic solidifying my gut reaction.

Drayton is my mate and I want him on every level.

Those people stole twenty-four years of wants and needs from me, but not anymore.

I want this and I’m not going to let the fear they instilled in me take that away.

“Tell me to stop if you don’t want to go any further. I don’t ever want to push you to do anything you don’t want to do or aren’t ready for, yet,” Drayton whispers a hair's breadth away from my lips. His blue eyes are staring intently into my own, his body holding me close yet making no further moves to deepen this moment until I give the okay.

“I will. I want this,” I confess, shifting on my knees to put pressure on the ache between my thighs. “I trust you, Drayton. With my heart, my life, and my body.”

A rumbling sound vibrates through his chest, his eyes closing tightly as he rests his forehead against mine. His hand tightens ever so slightly in my hair, tipping my head back so my neck is fully extended, open for him in a sign of submission.

The animal side of me connects with the human, combining my instincts with the raw human emotions running through me. My peryton and I aren’t the type to want control, we’re submissive by nature whereas Drayton, and the rest of my wolves, are pure control and domination.

“Please,” I beg after a moment when Drayton doesn’t make any attempt to kiss me. “Please, kiss me.”

“Say my name,” he growls, brushing his nose against my cheek softly, his breath sending shivers down my spine as it caresses my skin. “Say my name, Talia.”

A whimper escapes when I open my mouth from his lips gently running along my jaw. I release a shaky breath, pulling myself together long enough to whisper his name reverently.

“Drayton.”

Without a word, Drayton tangles his fingers deeper in my hair and descends on my lips. His soft, warm mouth touches mine softly at first, sending waves of magic through my body that sparks everywhere we touch.

Drayton’s tongue lightly runs along the seam of my lips, silently begging for entrance. My own mouth opens, eager to deepen the kiss with my mate. Our magic is coming alive as our bodies do the same. His other hand is running down my side, his fingertips delicately tracing the skin peeking out from my tank top.

He pulls back suddenly, his blue eyes searching mine. "Before this goes any further," Drayton murmurs as his eyes trace my face. "I need to say something. The moment I saw you running towards me in that chaotic hallway, I was hit with the force of our bond. I could barely take my eyes off of you, and then you were hurt right there in front of me."

My hand cups his cheek as his voice breaks slightly, his eyes going red with unshed tears. Pushing up off my knees, I climb into his lap, kissing up his jaw before resting my forehead against his temple.

"I hadn't even met you yet, and I thought I had already lost you. I picked you up after Penn went after the woman that hurt you, and I shed a tear of relief when I heard your heartbeat still going strong." Drayton's hands go around my back, hugging me tightly. "You're my mate through the fate of the goddess, but as I get to know you, I know that fate be damned, I would have picked you anyway."

"You would?" I whisper, pulling back in shock to look at the sincerity on his face.

"No matter how many lifetimes we lived, I would pick you every fucking time. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met and that extends to your heart and soul. Seeing people's emotions the way I do, I see even the things people try desperately to hide. I see the bad, the ugly, and the evil. You? You're brighter than the sun, with how pure your heart is. I would drown in your light if I could, and die a happy man."

Brushing my fingers down Dray's face, I smile through the happy tears. "You sure know how to make a woman feel special."

Drayton grabs my hand, kissing the palm before slowly kissing down to my wrist. "You haven't seen anything yet. I'm going to make you feel many things tonight, if you'll let me. Special." His tongue flicks out against my wrist, bringing a gasp to my lips. "Euphoric." Another swipe of his tongue has my hips shifting against the large, hard bulge in his jeans. "Loved."

The last word leaves his lips, hanging on my skin and lighting a fire that starts in my soul and spreads over my entire body.

"Yes," I moan, pushing down to get pressure right where I need it most. "Make me feel everything, Drayton."