Page 19

Daniel

I didn’t belong here. Who the hell was I kidding? None of that should have happened with Shawn. In what world did it make any sense? I’d gone from wanting to throttle him to shoving my dick down his throat. Though, it seemed like a good way to take out the aggression as well…

No, what was bothering me the most was how I’d opened up to him. I didn’t need Shawn to understand me. His friendship wasn’t one I wanted. Not after Art and Tilly. Something like that could only end in disaster again.

It didn’t change the fact that it had been one of the most mind-bending sexual experiences of my life. Missing pieces had clicked into place. Things I’d been craving became reality, and I’d more than enjoyed it. I wanted to experience more of it, but not with him. It couldn’t be with him.

But I wanted it to be him.

And that was the most fucked up part.

My phone pinged with an incoming message, and I snatched it off the nightstand. It was only three in the afternoon, but after orgasms and naps, it felt so much later.

Chase: No one has killed anyone yet, right?

I laughed, sending back the middle finger emoji.

Chase: Well, that’s a sign of life, at least…

I probably should have engaged my friend some more and talked to him about where my head was at, but I didn’t get to dwell on it for long when there was a knock on the bedroom door. Shawn couldn’t take a fucking hint. I needed some space to think. I couldn’t do that with his sexy ass anywhere in my vicinity.

“Go away, Shawn.”

“Don’t think I will.”

I huffed in irritation but didn’t get up to let him in. A few moments passed in silence before the door handle jiggled. He really wouldn’t give up.

“I said, leave me alone.”

The handle jiggled again. “Daniel. Come on. Don’t be like this. You forget this place belongs to my parents. I know where the keys are and I can go get them if I need to.”

Well, fuck. He wasn’t going to give me room. Got it.

I stood from the bed and unlocked the door. The door swung open immediately after I released the latch. My mouth ran dry to see Shawn standing there in nothing but his underwear. Not that I was any better. I’d toyed with the idea of a shower when I got back to the room, and I probably should have. I still had dried cum on my chest, but I wasn’t quite ready to remove the evidence of what we had done.

When Shawn looked me over, heat flared in his eyes. Now I not only had his mark on my neck but painted across my skin as well. For someone who was attempting to set a boundary, I sure was sending a lot of shitty signals.

Mark me. Make me yours. I’ll wear it like a badge of honor.

It wasn’t what I should have been saying, but I couldn’t stop it. Couldn’t bring myself to tell him that this shouldn’t continue. No, I let him back me into the room and push me onto the bed. I didn’t hesitate when his lips slanted against mine and a pathetic mewl escaped my throat.

I’d been waiting for this. Wanting this. And I didn’t care who finally gave it to me.

What little clothing we still had on disappeared and the feel of all his skin against mine set my body on fire. I burned in ways I’d never burned before. How did one person turn me inside out so completely? I wasn’t just ready to hand over everything with sex. Even though I hated him, somehow, I wanted to tell him everything. Shawn had been so gentle with me so far and I wanted to trust that he wouldn’t break me.

“Shawn,” I whined as he trailed bites and kisses down my chest, licking at the dried stripes of his prior release.

He blinked up at me, coming back for a kiss. “What is it, babe?”

My face heated. It wasn’t the first time he’d called me that, and it was another thing I should probably tell him to stop. The endearment implied a level of familiarity and trust we weren’t at yet. But I wanted it. Fuck, did I want it. Why? Why the hell did I want it?

I shook my head, embarrassed to ask for what I wanted. My thoughts were too much of a jumble to process it all.

Shawn’s hips flexed against me, causing his cock to drag along mine. A hiss passed my lips as my eyes widened.

“You like that?”

Words caught in my throat. I’d never been shy about sex, but asking for this? Asking for stuff with another man?

Why did that feel impossible? It was like being a shy virgin all over again.

Then again, in some ways, I was.

“Yeah,” I panted, trying to form words and ask for more. More of what? Fuck if I knew. Friction? Skin? Something. I needed something. And Shawn must have read my mind when his hand dipped between our bodies and wrapped around our lengths.

My eyes rolled back, and I cursed at the pressure. That shouldn’t feel so damn good, but fuck. This was everything.

“Oh, I think you more than like this.”

I sort of wanted him to shut up. To stop talking. The more he spoke, the more embarrassed I became. Heat flooded my body at the sensations racing through it. The feel of his skin on mine, the way his breath puffed past my ear, and the press of his hot, hard cock against mine. I was doomed. This wasn’t going to last.

Popping off now would be humiliating. I needed to last, to savor every last second.

When Shawn latched onto my neck again, sucking and biting at the flesh, I cried out. Little sparks raised goosebumps on my arms.

I should stop this. Letting him mark me again would only complicate things further, but at least this time, it was further down, and I could easily cover it with a shirt. Then the wildest idea hit me. Would it be the end of the world if others saw it? Did I want my friends to know what we’d gotten up to while we’d been stuck up here?

“Oh, oh fuck.” That low tingle started at the base of my spine. My hips snapped again and again, forcing my dick to drag along Shawn’s in the tunnel of his fist.

“That’s it, babe. Give me your load.”

My eyes slammed closed. What the hell was it about him calling me babe that shoved me over the edge? A strangled cry left my chest as I coated our stomachs and his fist. I gasped as the warm rush of Shawn’s cum followed my release.

When my eyes popped open again, I stared into the hazel depths. They swirled with emotions that I couldn’t read, but that feeling of suffocation and panic was settling into my chest again. How could I let this happen again?

I wanted it.

I still wanted it.

Instead of continuing to let my heart beat out of control, my eyes slid closed once more and I took a few deep breaths. I could do this. This wasn’t the same. Where Art had teased me in the past for wanting the things I did, Shawn gave. He gave and didn’t make me feel bad about it. He was a willing participant and as much as he drove me crazy…

“You’re overthinking it.”

When I opened my eyes again, Shawn sat up. He pulled me to sit alongside him. Words still wouldn’t form on my lips to explain exactly what was going through my head.

Maybe I was overcomplicating it. Who said this had to be anything more than messing around for a few days? Why not have some no-strings fun while we were stuck?

“I’m just—just not sure what I want to say,” I said as Shawn wrapped an arm around my shoulders. He pulled me in closer, placing a kiss on my temple. The small gesture sent warm tingles through my limbs. The move was almost too intimate and if I was going to reduce this to a meaningless hookup, I needed to create space.

But how did you create space when the person you wanted to get away from didn’t know the meaning of boundaries?