Page 57 of Wicked Tides #1

I couldn’t take my eyes off of them. They were joined by Mullins and David, who was smiling for the first time since Vidar had taken him from the other ship. One of the young girls was trying to keep up with his rapid foot movements and laughing at her inability to.

The dance was in good spirits. Everyone was switching partners and enjoying themselves, but time and time again, the woman found her way back to Vidar, her hands touching his body every chance she got.

And she was beautiful. There was an innocence to her youthful face that put light in her eyes.

A light I knew I didn’t have. Long, umber hair was braided to her waist and she had a round face untainted by scars and violence.

I took a deep breath and snatched a piece of salted fish off a platter in front of me, tearing into it with my teeth. Meridan’s hand came out to touch my arm and I glanced at her, realizing my emotions were getting the better of me.

I’d never wanted to claim Vidar in any way besides a fatal one.

For eighteen years, I imagined what he looked like and I saw myself killing him in so many ways.

I prayed to Lune that I would one day get that chance and hoped another wouldn’t steal the opportunity away.

Now, seeing a young woman practically parading herself in front of him was making me seeth.

She was touching him, offering him drinks, and it all made my teeth gnash. It shouldn’t have… but it did.

Whether I wanted to destroy him or not, he was mine.

A very possessive, overwhelming part of me knew it and it burned in my chest like a pit of flames.

I didn’t want to look at the young woman for fear of imagining terrible things.

One last glimpse in their direction and I saw Vidar pulling her close and teaching her the foot movements of some dance that matched the rhythm of the music.

The woman was stumbling and both were amused.

The big smiles on their faces fed the flames of my jealousy.

It was so easy for me to see myself sinking my nails into the woman’s eyes, plucking them out, and popping the orbs between my molars. How simple it would be to bite into her throat and drown her in her own blood. I wondered what one so innocent would taste like.

No.

It was my nature to wonder.

What wasn’t my nature was the desire to cage those urges so that I did not disrupt the happiness unfolding around me. I didn’t want to ruin it. I didn’t want to be the reason everything fell apart nor did I want to be the reason another blameless child’s life was destroyed .

So I watched Vidar and the woman have their fun.

I watched until both were out of breath and they finally parted ways.

Beside me, even Meridan had a smile on her face and that was something I never thought I would see.

Eventually, Mullins swayed his way toward us, gulping down another cup of the fermented drink, and held a hand out to her.

Meridan hesitated and then giggled— giggled —at Mullins and took his offer.

I was dumbfounded as I watched her prance away with him and join the fun, but I wasn’t pleased by the looks on some of the men’s faces as they passed. Uther and a few others sat by themselves at a table, watching, but not participating in the celebrations. I feared they would never warm up to us.

Not that I should care.

I was surprised by Mullins as much as I was surprised by Meridan. Though he’d been civil most of the time, his dislike for sirens had never waned nor did his expression of it. Now he was dancing with one and smiling about it.

Meridan never allowed herself to have fun. I watched her join a circle of skipping girls around the fire and couldn’t help myself. Vidar and the woman were forgotten. Seeing Meridan let down her guard and wash herself of her sorrows and fears was perhaps the brightest image at that feast.

Long into the night, things finally began to die down.

The younger members of the tribe retreated to their homes to rest. Then the elderly disappeared while the men of the Rose found corners and benches to pass out on.

Young ladies from the village gently coaxed a few to their feet to take them somewhere they wouldn’t freeze to death in the night while the stronger men dragged others away.

A couple crewmen still sat by the firepit singing slow shanties with drunken slurs, still sipping their drinks, but otherwise, everyone had gone.

Including Vidar. I saw him walk away on his own some time ago and had expected him to return, but he never did. My gut turned at the idea that he might have been with the young woman somewhere private. The image of the two sweaty in bed with her moaning beneath him made my nostrils flare.

I balled my fists on the table, recalling the direction he’d gone when he left. I took a big swig of water and then stood from the bench, heading out toward the cave. I thought it strange that he’d gone that way, but perhaps he and his little admirer wanted time alone somewhere remote.

The idea sickened me.

Nearing the cave, I saw the illumination of a torch deep in its cavernous depths and paused. Perhaps it was not smart to pursue him when I was so clearly unhinged about the thought of him fucking a woman. I was liable to kill someone and Teles had warned me against such things.

But I was not a smart woman when it came to my impulses and I trudged on, my soft, leathery boots crunching on the frosty ground.

I was prepared to see something I didn’t want to, but when I got closer, I realized my suspicions were wrong.

I smelled only one presence. A familiar one.

One that made me feel stripped all over again.

Through the darkness, I could see him, alone, standing in the cave with a torch raised toward the wall of the long passage where I knew the carvings littered the stone.

Beside him, he’d also built a small fire to stay warm. He was planning on staying a while.

I could have turned back at that point. He was alone and my jealousy was misplaced. I could have left. I should have left.

But I didn’t. I went forward.