Page 28 of Wicked Salvation

Her eyes are wild, pupils blown.

She looks like someone losing her mind.

And maybe she is.

I wish I were someone else.

It takesme a day to compose myself.

By then, Anastazya is back—I can’t stay here with her.

Emotionally, I’m still a wreck, but this isn’t the first time that I’ve had to pretend I’m fine when my entire world is falling apart. The pale light streams through the window that Anastazya refuses to close, even at night.

I take a shower hotter than Hell, getting rid of the last bit of my tears. By the time I’m at the closet, slipping on my button-down and adjusting my skirt, I feel more like myself. My light makeup is perfect, my lips are glossed, my hair is cornrowed at the front, the rest of it falling down my shoulders is tight coils.

After I’m finished getting dressed, I sling my Birkin over my shoulder—it’s my first time wearing this bag to classes, but I need every bit of courage I can get, and it just so happens to cost £75,000. Then, I turn to my nightstand.

There, partially obscured by the antique lamp, is a velvet box. I know what’s in it, yet I walk over to it all the same, my heart pounding in my chest. I’ve had time to think.

Lucian doesn’t want me.

He may be right—but I also can’t just let go of my plans for the future for a man who didn’t even want to hear my side of the story about what happened. Pushing thoughts of the night we shared out of my mind, I pick up the box.

I hesitate.

Then I open it.

Sitting in it is a fourteen carat oval diamond ring, set in yellow gold. I slip it on, my stomach churning as it bring back memories of how Silas slipped it on my finger by the lake. I had taken it off before I went to see Lucian.

I guess a part of me always knew he would hate me for saying yes.

Doesn’t stop it from hurting any less though. Blinking quickly, I get the tears off my lashes before they can ruin my mascara. I’m smoothing down the edges of my skirt when I’m reminded that someone else is in the room with me.

“You have energy today,” Anastazya says, looking me up and down. She’s dressed for school herself, though there’s something off-putting about her that I can’t place.

Maybe it’s the thin brows that don’t really suit her face.

“Yes,” I say matter-of-factly.

She takes a step closer, enough for me to feel like I’m choking on the scent of her jasmine perfume. “Why were you so sad yesterday?”

I make a face. “Why are you questioning me, Anastazya?” I can’t help the irritation that slips out in my tone. “We are not peers, don’t forget.”

She chuckles lightly to herself, then her eyes land on my finger. There’s a shift in her expression that I can’t place. For a ‘Grand Duchess,’ shouldn’t jewelry like this be normal to her? After a few seconds of awkward silence, I turn to make my way out the door.

“That’s a beautiful ring…”

I clear my throat. “I know. That’s why I said yes to his proposal.” My tone comes off so severe, it makes me feel like I’m not the one talking.

Like my body has been possessed by someone else.

My mother.

“Who is he?”

I pivot on my heel to look her square in the eye. She’s much taller than me, but I still manage it. “Everyone on campus knows that I am being courted by Silas Peregrine-Ashford IV, the next Duke of Surrey.”

Anastazya gives me a terse smile. “He must love you very much.”