Page 90 of White Raven (Nevermore Duet #2)

“She was rife with joy. With tenderness for you…even when she knew she’d raise you alone.

I couldn’t keep the truth from her. She deserved to know that the impossibility of what grew inside her body, might very well be the death of her.

And so, I revealed myself again. This time at her home.

At first, she was grateful. She was glad to know that my knowledge of your existence wasn’t a burden.

That I’d be glad to be in your lives, and even if we never became more…

we would raise you together.” He turned toward her, and the pain on his face was almost heartbreaking.

“My darling…I truly wished for… nothing more .”

Nothing more…

But he couldn’t. Because he was what he was. Athan’s body stiffened against her back, and Sarah’s heart broke. For her mother. And for her father. Poe returned his hands to his lower back, taking a long breath.

“It was such a cruel price to pay. Crushing that beautiful spirit to give her the truth. But there was no way to be there for the two of you without it. I was at her mercy. At first, she didn’t believe me.

But I drew my own blood—let her see me for what I truly was, and then…

she was terrified. Not of me…but of what it would mean for you .

She told me she would birth you, even if it killed her.

And she did. I was not to be near. Katherine gave birth to you…

on January 29th. Only minutes after midnight.

On one of the coldest, and rainiest nights Seattle had ever seen.

The day that so many years prior—I published the poem that brought me fame.

Like The Raven , you…you were my legacy, Sarah. ”

Once upon a midnight dreary…while I pondered, weak and weary…

“Sarah…” Athan breathed, almost to himself…

“It was as if my haunted mind had foretold you. I wanted so desperately to see you. To be near you. The bird revealed your good health. Katherine’s.

Your hair, the color of the feather I’d left on her pillow that morning.

Your eyes as wide and entrancing as hers.

I spent nearly a week distracting my mind with books.

With writing. With anything that would keep me from breaking my promise to your mother and letting you both live in peace.

I thought that knowing a part of me lived… would be enough. But it wasn’t.”

Eagerly I wished the morrow;—vainly I had sought to borrow

From my books surcease of sorrow—sorrow for the lost Lenore—

For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore—

Nameless here for evermore.

“In my mind…I had named you. I didn’t yet know what she called you, or if she’d even cared.

She did not seek me. She was just as spelled by your very existence, and so in love with you, that I, like every other time in my life…

was forgotten. And so, again…I came to her door.

I brought with me a piece of my childhood.

A piece of myself to leave with you. I told myself that I would hold you once…

leave you with the secret reminder of your blood—your heritage—and be grateful that you were alive and loved by someone as pure as Katherine St. James.

You would grow and thrive. She gave me that dignity.

And the moment I wrapped you in that coverlet…

the moment you looked at me with her eyes…

my heart belonged to another. To my daughter … to my little bird.”

A tear rolled down Sarah’s cheek, cooling as it reached her chin. She met her father’s eyes. “The blanket…it was yours.”

“Created by my mother’s own hands when I was a small child. One of the only things I had left of her when I parted ways with my sisters, and went to live with John Allan. It followed me everywhere I went. As it also seems to do with you.”

“It—It gives me so much warmth…comfort…I’ve always loved that ratty-ass blanket.”

Poe smiled. A genuine smile. One filled not with insanity—but adoration.

“I named you that night. If Katherine had chosen another for you, she never said so. She was happy. As was I. There are only a very few times in my life that I’ve been able to shed tears…

and that night, they flowed like rivers of spring.

Like the rain on the night you were born.

I agreed to leave you, and never return, keeping watch on you both with the bird’s help.

I marked myself with the ink I continued to use, and the very quill I scribbled my notes with—the true nature of a writer—the significance of you in my flesh… forever .”

“So, you left us. Because she wanted to protect me from the truth?” Sarah asked, hoarsely. He nodded.

“It was the agreement we made. You would live without knowledge of me. Without the knowledge of this coven, and all the darkness that came with it. You’d live among angels, fighting that darkness with the light she gave to you.

But then…” He smirked, and his mustache twitched as he started to pace the floor.

All of them followed his figure with their stares, slack-jawed, and consumed by his story.

“I was in Portland, drowning my mind with research for the wolves, and their protection. A project that distracted me for a long while. A member of the coven informed me that Katherine was attempting to reach out to me…about your well-being. Your body was growing, and your blood—it was different. You were different. So, I traveled back to Seattle. I saw you from a distance…riding a bicycle and cursing when your mother wasn’t near enough to hear you every time it toppled over.

” He smiled, recalling the memory, and turned to pace in the direction of the window.

“I was careful that day to hide within the shadows of the sunset. She called you inside for dinner, and you threw that small contraption with strength that no child that age should have had. Your temper was amusing, but…I could see what was different about you. The fear any mother would have for her child. The uncertainty of what you might become.” He paused, and stared out the window, the deep navy of dawn creeping across the skies.

“I spoke with Katherine as you slept that night. Begged her to nullify our agreement. To let me study you, and make sure that you’d be safe. She refused.”

Sarah’s brows drew together. “She said no?”

Another nod.

“Instead, she gave me a sample of your blood. I had it tested. I tried to concoct a way to keep you from becoming what we are but found no answer. Eventually, your blood would grow with you, changing and…changing you with it. Years later, when it was time for you to graduate, I came back to Seattle after receiving an invitation to your ceremony from your mother. The graduation ceremony was at noon…of course, I could not attend. That evening, I watched you. Watched you dismiss your friend’s invitations to celebrate, and instead…

you read. Read books as you wrapped yourself in that coverlet.

On the couch, while you and your mother drank champagne, and laughed.

You were beautiful. Happy. Brilliant. I realized then that no matter what your body became…

you would be strong enough to live your own fulfilling life. You didn’t need me. But…I needed you .”

“You asked again,” Athan stated, clutching Sarah closer.

“I begged her. Again, she refused. She didn’t want to risk your happiness…

your simple life. I understood it, but…I could not accept it.

I argued that you were old enough then to decide for yourself.

And that eventually, some explanation would have to be made for the way your blood would change—your body .

We fought that night. I had never seen Katherine so angry.

So cross. My head, it—I was so damaged, and I fought so hard against it. I had to leave.”

This was…going somewhere he seemed strained to travel. Sarah could feel the tension build between them like a steel wall. His eyes changed. Sorrow began to fill them. The demon inside that he never had the strength to conquer.

Sarah…this—I don’t think…

He knew it too. Felt it. Saw it. Sarah went wholly still.

I need to hear him say it. Don’t coax him. I—it can’t be the truth.

But she knew deep down…it was. It was going to come out, and for a second, she wondered if she truly wanted to know.

“I drove back to Portland. I stayed there for two days. My mind was so restless. My fury outweighed my resolve, and…I knew she wouldn’t seek me.

I knew she wouldn’t reveal the truth to you, so that you’d seek me instead.

The demon won. I returned to Seattle and watched her.

She left a market late at night. She’d gotten a bottle of wine.

Stopped and fueled her car. She was humming in that beautiful voice as she watched the pump.

A song I remembered from the night I first saw her.

A fire raged in my blood. My head raged along with it.

I followed her home, and when she stepped out of the car, she turned, and—I… ”

Sarah’s chest heaved up and down. Her adrenaline rushed, and roaring filled her ears. “You killed her…”

His eyes were pleading. Guilt etched every line of his face.

He said nothing. Sarah flashed back to the way her mother looked in that plastic bubble.

Flashed back to Rachel Foster telling her that not a single drop was taken from her…

that it was murder …not an attack fueled by bloodlust. The perfect murder for one of his dark stories.

“By the time I’d bitten her, I realized it was too late.

Her eyes…the way she looked at me. A betrayal like no other.

I thought it was what I wanted…but it was too late to stop it.

The venom would smite her. Turning her would erase the woman she was.

That messenger from the heavens…the mother she was to you. The love she was to me.”

Sarah had asked her for a name.

“No! I wanna know the truth, Mom. You owe me that much. Tell me what happened, tell me who did this to you!”

“I can’t do that. I love you too much. You’re the best thing I ever had in my life. If you knew the truth it would only hurt you more. Put it behind you and move on. Please…do it for me.”

Her heart shattered.

“Please, Mama! His name!”

Her mother’s teary face being covered in claws of midnight blurred in and out of her mind.

“His name is John Allan…”

That name echoed through her mind. Whispers raged with it…her voice. Her warning. The truth she’d begged her not to uncover. Sarah’s vision focused on the man watching her from the window.

JohnAllan…JohnAllan…JohnAllan…

“She never knew who you really were,” Sarah croaked, grief dripping from every word.

“She really did give me the name of her killer. She gave me everything .” Poe’s thick eyebrows lowered, and she turned back to look at Athan, who was trembling with the need to rip that man apart.

“She gave me you. She told me in the veil…she pushed us together. She was the one who threw a wrench in his plans. She knew you were my mate .”

“Dear God,” Tony finally whispered under his breath.

Sarah slowly stood, Athan standing with her. Tony reluctantly followed suit. She took a step forward, and Poe didn’t balk. He lifted his chin, submitting himself as the raven on the bust next to them…spoke.

“Nevermore,” he trilled.

“Yes… nevermore .” She clenched her fists at her sides. “Never again. You took her. You fucked up my life. You took her from me …”

The whispers continued, and he glanced at the pendant around her neck. The remnants of a woman so pure, that she was allowed to actually be a messenger.

“The death of a beautiful woman…is unquestionably the most poetic topic in the world,” he recited softly, meeting her murderous stare. “Little bird.”

“Are you ready to die?” she asked, her voice like gravel.

Poe only smiled back at her, lifting his arms to the sides like a crucifixion.