Page 6 of Whispers of the Void (Voidborn Chronicles #1)

CHAPTER 6

RAIZ

* * *

T he quiet of the bridge normally puts me at ease, but as I take over for the night, I can’t help but feel as though something is off. There’s nothing near us, no ships within our range of detection, but I feel an overwhelming sense of dread. I pull all the ship systems to check for any issues, but all looks good. Sensors still show we’re blissfully alone; we should make it to the outpost ahead of schedule.

“Captain?” Hyva’s voice comes through my communicator. “I need you down in med bay.”

“On my way. Lieutenant, the bridge is yours,” I tell the young pilot who works alongside Vynia.

It’s not unheard of for our crew to get carried away in the sparring ring, so I assume that’s what I'm walking into downstairs. I’ll just have to broker some sort of peace and dole out a punishment that makes sense.

I stop short as soon as I see who is laid out on the bed. My speed increases as I take up a spot beside Altis while Hyva runs a scanner over her body. A bunch of numbers flash on his screen, but I don’t know what they mean.

“What happened?”

“I don’t know. Vynia told me Neev had mentioned a headache earlier, so I decided to go give her some of the medicine you gave me for mine,” Altis says to us. “I knocked, but no one answered, so I look in just to check and found her sweating on the bed. She was crying but wouldn’t wake up.”

“Do you know what’s happening?” I ask Hyva.

“No. It doesn’t make sense. Everything is normal aside from her brain wave pattern and heart rate spikes. I can’t get her to wake up.”

“Could it be from a headache?”

“I don’t know. My scope of practice on humans is quite limited.”

She whimpers and thrashes on the bed. Tears stream from the corners of her closed eyes. I look at Hyva and see the helplessness I feel mirrored back at me in his gaze.

“You could mind walk,” he says quietly.

“No.” My answer is quick and firm. The thought of entering her subconscious without her consent makes me ill.

“I know you feel it’s intrusive when you haven’t been given permission to enter someone’s mind, but something is wrong here. If I can’t get her heart rate under control, she could die.”

This feels like it would be akin to forcing myself on a female. Would this even work on a human? What if I do something that damages her while I’m in there? Not to mention, once a channel is formed, it’s so much easier for me to do it again.

Hyva grips my shoulder. “It’s the only shot we have unless we find a human somewhere in the outer belt of this shit hole system. One with medical knowledge.”

Fuck.

“Get me a chair,” I say to him quietly. While he clears out the med bay and grabs a chair from his office, I lean down over Neev. “Please forgive me for what I’m about to do,” I say quietly, wiping one of the tears from her hot skin.

I slowly lower myself down into the chair Hyva sets behind me. My fingers glide into her hair, settling just behind her ear. I shouldn’t take notice of how soft it is, but I can’t help thinking that it’s even more beautiful up close. And stars, she smells of my soap, which makes parts of me stir in ways I’ve never experienced.

I close my eyes and search for a way inside her mind. Her mind is frantic; she’s scared of something. It drives me to push harder, to find a pathway in. To save her. I weave my way through the barrier of her mind and halt at what I find.

* * *

Everything is white in every direction. There’s only an endless expanse stretched before me, empty of anything except a small form curled in a ball in the distance. I run toward it, my instincts screaming that it’s Neev.

As I come closer, I realize I’m correct. Her eyes are closed tight, and she rocks back and forth, tucked into a ball with her hands over her ears. I drop to my knees beside her and say her name, but she doesn’t acknowledge my presence at all. I try again.

Should I touch her?

The question is answered as soon as I notice her trembling. There is no way I can’t reach out to her. Slowly I reach forward and put my hands on her shaking shoulders.

She jumps at the contact and lifts her head. Confusion colors her gaze at the sight of me. She looks around as though she’s trying to figure out why I’m sitting in front of her.

I don’t move, and, stars, her skin is so soft beneath my rough palms. I wonder if her skin is actually this smooth or if it’s just some weird mind walking trick. She wraps her hands around my wrists and slides them up my forearms.

“Are you real?”

“Yes.”

“How are you here? In my mind?”

“I can mind walk. It’s a gift of my bloodline.”

The fact that she knows she’s inside her own mind is interesting. I wasn’t sure how she’d react or what I’d find. She almost seems grateful or at the very least relieved to see me.

“Do you hear them?” she asks, still clinging to me.

“Hear what?”

“The whispers. They get so loud I can’t block them out.”

“The only thing I hear is you.”

“Great.” She drops her head onto my arm. “Even in my mind, my mind is fucked.”

“Does this happen every time your head hurts?”

“Yes, but it’s rare. I take a daily medication for it on Oculus Nine.”

She’s still so pale when she looks up at me. Wet tracks cover her cheeks from the tears that keep streaming from her eyes.

“I’m going to try to bring you out with me, is that okay?”

“Can you do that?”

“I’ve never tried it before. But I never fail either.”

I stand and offer her my hand. She looks at me as she tentatively accepts my help up. I don’t release hers as she gets to her feet, and she doesn’t seem to want to let go of mine either.

Good.

I guide her in the same direction that I entered from. I should just be able to walk back out the same way I came in. At least I hope so.

The barrier of her consciousness puts up the barest hint of resistance, but I push through, dragging her with me. Then I open my eyes.

* * *

My fingers are still in her hair when I’m back in the med bay. I watch as her eyes flutter beneath her eyelids. Hyva says something, but I ignore him, staying entirely focused on Neev.

I can finally breathe again when her silver- and violet-flecked eyes open. They immediately lock on me. I didn’t realize how close I was leaning in toward her until I feel the warmth of her breath brush my lips. I should back up, remove my fingers from her hair.

But I don’t. I’m locked in this moment with her.

She breaks it when she looks around in confusion. “How did I get here?”

“Altis found you. He was going to give you a medicinal tea that helps relieve his headaches.”

“Oh. That was kind of him.”

“Is this something that happens frequently?” Hyva asks.

“No, but I’ve been taking medication regularly for as long as I can remember. I get headaches when I forget to take it.”

Hyva leans back against the edge of the empty bed beside her. “Do you know the name of the medication?”

“No. I’ve been taking it for as long as I can remember. There would always be a little cup with the pill in it when I’d get dinner. I never really questioned it.”

She sits up, causing my fingers to fall from her hair. I miss the softness immediately but back up to a more proper distance.

“It’s okay.” Hyva gently pushes her back down against the pillow. “Rest for a little while, and then I’ll release you to go back to your quarters.” He looks at me and then his office.

I take the cue and follow him, walking into the bright space while he presses the button to have the doors slide close behind us.

“Contacting the Order is out of the question?—”

He holds a hand up, silencing me. “I don’t want to do that. I mean, I do want to know what they were giving her, but I think something else was going on.”

“What do you mean?”

“It doesn’t make sense that they’d just give her medication every day without ever telling her why. Now I have to figure out if her headaches are from not having the medication, or if it treated her headaches.”

“Do you know enough about human medications to look into it?”

“I know nothing about their medicines. Keep everyone on board healthy for the next few days while I research.”

“What do I do with her in the meantime?”

“Keep a close eye on her.” He looks at the monitor showing all her readings. “Everything looks good now. She’s okay to leave.”

He stays behind, already beginning his research while I walk out into the main room. Her eyes are closed, the fringe of hair that grows along her eyelids fans out over slightly purpled skin. I move to place my hand on her arm but stop just before making contact. I have to stop touching her.

“Neev.”

Her eyes flutter open at the sound of my voice. She blinks a few times and pulls herself into a sitting position. “Am I good to go?”

“From med bay? Yes.”

“Good.”

She tosses the blanket that’s covering her off and swings her legs to the side. Her legs are bare from mid-thigh down to her bare feet. Altis clearly didn’t think to grab her shoes. The floors are clean on the ship, so I’m not concerned for her safety in the hall, more so just for her comfort.

But as I watch her stand and begin to walk toward the door my worries for her comfort seem to be misplaced. She moves like she’s on a mission. In fact, her speed is the quickest I’ve seen so far, not that I can’t easily catch up.

“Bet you’re having second thoughts about snatching me up, aren’t you,” she says when I fall in step beside her.

“Not at all. I did want to apologize for earlier.”

Her pace falters. “What do you mean?”

“For mind walking without your consent first.”

“Why would you be sorry about that? You did it to help me.”

“Yes, but it’s an intensely personal thing to invade someone’s mind like that. I could have seen things you wanted to be kept private.”

“Did you?”

“I didn’t see anything but you.”

“It’s unsettling, isn’t it? That void of anything within my head.”

“How long has it been like that?”

“Forever.”

“And you get stuck in there?”

“No, never like that. Whatever the Order gives me always stops me from having those types of episodes.”

Walking beside her while I’m fully dressed in my uniform and she’s in only her night clothes makes her feel fragile beside me. A protective need claws at my chest from inside me. I fight it back with logic and reason, reminding myself that no matter how small, how soft, how lovely she is, she’s still just a tool.

My mission is greater than the need for a female in my bed.

Which is why I bite back any questions or further conversations with her. She’s nothing more than means to an end for me. I wait by the door to my quarters as she disappears inside and then go straight to the training center. Even if I can’t spar, I can guide others.

* * *

Icy water laps around me as I swim away my thoughts. Every Zeahiri ship has a pool on board. As a species that evolved from the sea, we all continue to have the ability to breathe underwater. It’s a place we can go to recenter ourselves. It’s why at one end you’ll find benches built into the bottom of the pool floor.

If sparring doesn’t ease our frustration, the water always will. Each stroke across the surface soothes the savagery growing within me every time I let myself think about Neev. There’s something wrong, a lot of things wrong.

Why is her mind so clear of anything? No memories, nothing but her fear as she laid curled in on herself. Was the Order helping her or hurting her? She seems to be under the impression they were only doing what they could to help her.

But she also doesn’t seem to have a concrete grasp of what they actually do there. The way they claim to help, but the price is always to allow them to hoard the knowledge and power they help a species understand.

Despite a deep desire to trust Neev, I have to remind myself to stay cautious. Prior to entering her subconscious, I actually thought she might be deceiving us. Now I’m not sure.

She’s a distraction I can’t afford to have. Not with the revolution on the line. Each day that passes, the Sovereign gains more power. Power he’s held for nearly one thousand rotations.

We have to get the parts for the ship, get back to Zeahiri, and somehow get Neev to the text. If I can avoid being called upon for my High Lord duties, it’d be ideal. Unfortunately, it will be hard to keep my presence in House Aste a secret. I’ll be called on for at least several functions.

The sound of someone walking on the pool deck pulls me from my thoughts. I kick off the bottom of the pool and break the surface to find Vynia standing at the edge. She’s in her uniform, so I assume she’s not here to join me. I grab the edge and pull myself out of the water, landing on my feet in front of her.

“We’re approaching the outpost. Just a few hours out from landing.” She watches as I dry off. “When was the last time you slept?”

“Do I look that bad?”

“Yes. Stop deflecting.”

“My sleep schedule is outside the purview of my pilot.”

“I’m not asking as your pilot.” She adopts a familiar stance that means she’s not letting me walk past her without giving her answers. “Are you having nightmares again?”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll sleep once we’re home.”

“I’m not the only one worried. Altis is too.”

This is the part of having your two closest friends, basically only family, serving under you. No one else on board would dare question me. But these two have never been afraid of me.

“I’m fine.” I drop the used towel into a laundry bin at the door. “I’ll meet you on the bridge in an hour.”