Page 9 of Whispers and Warriors (After #2)

NINE

William shifted restlessly in the back of the truck, his fingers drumming an anxious rhythm against his thigh. The plan had unraveled, spiraling out of control like a kite caught in a bad storm. Every bump and dip in the road jostled his already destroyed nerves.

He glanced around, taking in the tense expressions etched all around him. Bash looked even more stoic than usual, his mouth set in a straight line and even his eyebrows had drawn down. Alex seemed to have checked out, going god knows where, but he sat staring blankly while he bit his lip.

And then there was Emma.

She sat quietly, her brown hair tumbling over her shoulders, and her striking hazel eyes focused on some unseen point, similar to Alex’s eyes. Her legs were tugged against her chest, arms wrapped around them as if she could shield herself from their race. She’d sat beside him for awhile, but he’d moved to give Alex or Bash time with her.

They both seemed to out of it to take it, and Bash hadn’t let go of the latch, as if he worried the door would fling open.

William shifted in his seat, inching closer to Emma until their shoulders brushed. He sought the comfort of her proximity, craving the solace that only she seemed to provide. Tentatively, he took her hand, their fingers intertwining in a silent exchange of reassurance. The warmth of her skin against his sent a wave of calm washing over him, temporarily quieting the tempest of doubts that raged within his mind.

He marveled at how she could do that—bring him peace without even trying. It was as if her very presence could calm him soul.

As the truck jostled along the uneven road, William allowed his thoughts to wander, his gaze fixed on the passing landscape through the windshield without truly seeing it. He thought about the man he had become, so different from the na?ve boy who had eagerly joined the military in the wake of his family’s death. The weight of responsibility settled heavily upon his shoulders, a constant reminder of the lives that depended on his decisions.

“What would my father think of me now?” William mused aloud, his voice barely above a whisper. “The choices I’ve made, the things I’ve done...”

Emma squeezed his hand, her touch a gentle anchor in the turbulence of his emotions. “You’ve done what you had to do to survive, to protect the people you care about,” she said, her hazel eyes shimmering with understanding. “Your father would be proud of the man you’ve become, Will. I know I am.”

William swallowed hard, his throat constricting with the swell of emotions threatening to overwhelm him. He knew Emma’s words were meant to comfort him, but they also served as a stark reminder of the sacrifices he had made, the pieces of himself he had lost along the way.

“I’m not sure I recognize myself anymore,” he confessed, his voice trembling slightly. “The things I’ve seen, the choices I’ve had to make... It changes you, Em. In ways, I never thought possible. Not that I need to tell you of all people that.”

“He’d be proud,” Bash chimed in unexpectedly. “I remember the kid who showed up, ready to save the world after he lost his.” He gave a chuckle. “You’re not him anymore, not that there was anything wrong with him.”

Emma leaned her head against William’s shoulder, her curls tickling the side of his neck. “We’ve all changed,” she murmured, her breath warm against his skin. “But our love, our loyalty to each other... that’s what keeps us human, William. That’s what we’re fighting for. It’s why I wanted to leave the basement and find a real community.”

William nodded, drawing strength from the unwavering conviction in her voice. He knew that Emma was right, that their love was the one constant in a world turned upside down. It was the force that drove them forward, the light that guided them through the darkest of nights.

And yet, even as he clung to that love, William couldn’t shake the feeling that the man he had become was a stranger to himself. The importance of his role, the choices he had made in the name of survival...they had left their mark upon his soul, indelible scars that he feared might never heal.

As the truck continued through what had to be the bumpiest stretch of land in the world, William closed his eyes, allowing himself a moment of respite in the comfort of Emma’s presence. He knew that the road ahead would be fraught with challenges, that the ghosts of his past would continue to haunt him. Maybe, just maybe once this ferry took them where they were going, redemption for the lives he took might still be within reach, that the man he had become might one day make peace with the boy he had once been.

The truck lurched to a halt, the sudden stillness jarring William from his thoughts. The silence that followed was heavy, broken only by Ranger’s soft whine from the front seat.

“Alright, everyone out,” Chris announced, his voice cutting through the tension. “If you need to use the restroom, now’s your chance. But remember, no one goes alone. I’m not sure if my ID will work for fueling, and it’s abso-fucking-lutely a terrible idea to scan it, but we need gas. We’re not walking unless she gives out.”

William nodded, squeezing Emma’s hand one last time before rising to his feet. Suddenly, there was an undeniable to stretch his legs, to escape the confines of the truck and clear his mind.

“I’ll go with him,” Alex said, falling into step beside William.

William shot him a grateful smile, appreciating the company. Alex had a way of lightening even the darkest of moods, his irreverent humor a welcome respite from the constant strain of survival.

Surprisingly, Ranger bounded around the side of the truck, tongue lolling out the side of his mouth. “I suppose you need a potty, too?” William scratched the pup’s head with a smile. “Come on then. We won’t go too far.”

As they walked, William couldn’t help but marvel at the eeriness of their surroundings. At the way the sun cast long shadows across the cracked earth. It was a world stripped bare, a testament to the fragility of life and the enduring power of nature.

“You know, I used to dream of coming somewhere in the middle of nowhere when this all started,” Alex mused, his voice tinged with a hint of nostalgia. “Wide open spaces, no rules, no responsibilities... Just freedom.”

William glanced at him, surprised by the rare moment of introspection. “And now?”

Alex shrugged, his gaze distant. “Now, I’d give anything for a hot shower and a cold beer and want rules more than anything else I’ve ever wanted in life. Funny how priorities change, isn’t it?”

William nodded, understanding all too well the urge to bury his head in the sand and why he didn’t.

Granted, Alex’s was more noble. William’s was out of fear.

“I think I need some quiet,” was all he said to Alex. For some reason, the last few days weighed heavier on him than the last few years.

William’s boots crunched against the dry, cracked earth as he ventured away from the truck, his eyes scanning the desolate surroundings with a mixture of wariness and desperation. Ranger padded alongside him, the dog’s presence a small comfort.

The gas station seemed to have been long abandoned, the rusted remains of gas pumps standing like skeletal sentinels against the harsh sunlight. He wasn’t even certain the military would’ve kept delivering gas here. William moved cautiously, his hand resting on the butt of his gun as he searched for anything that might be of use to their dwindling supplies. But as he poked through the debris, it became increasingly clear that there was nothing of value to be found.

The emptiness of the surroundings seemed to mirror the growing sense of desperation gnawing at William’s gut. They needed more food, water, and ammunition. Yes, Liam and Alex had stockpiled, but it wouldn’t last forever.

With a heavy sigh, William paused, his shoulders sagging as he allowed himself a moment to simply breathe. The constant tension that had become his constant companion seemed to ease, if only for a moment, as he closed his eyes and let his mind drift.

Memories of the past few months flashed through his mind, a montage of images and sensations that seemed both distant and all too real. He thought of the day the toxin had first been released, the chaos and panic that had engulfed the world in a matter of hours. He remembered the loss of his family, the grief that had threatened to consume him before he had found purpose in the military.

And then there was Emma. William’s heart clenched at the thought of her, at the way she had come into his life like a beacon of light in the darkness. She had given him a reason to keep fighting, to believe that there was still something worth saving in this broken world.

“You good if I go take a leak?” Alex’s voice cut through William’s reverie, bringing him back to the present.

William shook his head, his expression grim. “Go for it. I’ve got you. Not sure I need to go, just wanted to get out. Ranger, stay.” He hadn’t noticed if the dog went yet, but he didn’t want Ranger wandering off.

Alex nodded and moved off just a bit. William kept his gaze just past Alex, not really watching for anything, but not trusting anything.

“All good,” Alex called before turning back around. “You sure you don’t wanna go?”

“Yeah, I want to just check for supplies. If Chris’s card scans at the pump, we should be able to get some food and water from inside.”

“Will, Chris didn’t say to do that.”

They only ever used part of his name when shit was serious.

“No, he didn’t, but I’m the one who rations our stuff. We’re together and one card is no worse than two. Except it confirms we’re together.”

Alex looked like he was going to say something, but snapped his mouth shut, gesturing for William to lead the way.

Ranger suddenly stiffened and stopped walking beside him, a low growl rumbling in his throat. William’s hand instinctively went to his gun, his senses on high alert as he scanned the area for any sign of danger. The dog’s hackles were raised, his teeth bared.

“What is it, boy?” he murmured, scanning the area for any sign of danger.

But before he could react, Alex was already moving, his long strides carrying him swiftly toward the source of Ranger’s agitation. William cursed under his breath and followed, his heart pounding in his chest as he rounded the corner of the building.

The sight that greeted them was one of pure horror.

A man lay sprawled on the ground, his body twisted at an unnatural angle like a broken doll. Blood seeped from multiple wounds, painting the once dry brown dirt a sickening shade of crimson. His face was contorted in agony, mouth agape as if frozen in a silent scream. His dark blue eyes bore into William’s with a pleading desperation, begging for help or mercy. It was a scene straight out of a nightmare.

“Jesus fuck,” Alex whispered, mirroring William’s thoughts.

“Please,” the man rasped, his voice barely more than a whisper. “Please, help me.”

William’s stomach churned as he took in the extent of the man’s injuries. It was clear that he had been run over, his lower body crushed beyond recognition. There was no way he would survive, even if they had the means to help him.

Alex crouched down beside the man, his expression grim. “What happened to you?” he asked, his tone gentle despite the harshness of their surroundings.

The man’s eyes fluttered closed, his breathing labored. “They left me,” he whispered, his words punctuated by a cough that sent flecks of blood spraying from his lips. “Said I was... dead weight.”

William’s heart clenched at the man’s words, at the cruelty of a world that could abandon one of its own so callously. He glanced back toward the truck where Chris still worked with the fuel pump, his ID likely deactivated and useless.

“Please,” the man begged again, his voice growing weaker by the second. “End it. I can’t... I can’t take the pain anymore.”

William met Alex’s gaze, saw the same grim determination reflected back at him. They both knew what needed to be done, even if it went against everything they had once believed in.

With a heavy heart, William reached for his gun, his fingers curling around the trigger as he took aim. He closed his eyes, sending up a silent prayer for the man’s soul, and for his own.

Then, with a deep breath, he squeezed the trigger, and the world went mercifully silent as his ears adjusted.

The shot echoed through the desolate landscape, a haunting reminder of the brutality of their new reality. William barely flinched as he lowered the gun, his eyes fixed on the lifeless body before him. He had taken countless lives before, but this...this felt different.

“You did what you had to do,” Alex said quietly, placing a hand on William’s shoulder. “He was suffering. You ended that suffering before I could.”

William nodded, swallowing hard against the lump in his throat. He knew Alex was right, but it didn’t make the weight of his actions any easier to bear.

The sound of running footsteps drew their attention, and they turned to see Chris rounding the corner, his gun at the ready. “What happened?” he demanded, his eyes darting between William and Alex.

“We found a man,” Alex explained, his voice steady despite the gravity of the situation. “He was badly injured, begging for death. William...Will ended his suffering.”

Chris’s gaze settled on William, and for a moment, he saw a flicker of understanding in the older man’s eyes. Then, just as quickly, it was gone, replaced by the steely resolve that had kept them all alive this long.

“Get back in the truck,” Chris ordered, his tone leaving no room for argument. “We don’t need to be here when anyone else hears that gunshot.”

William nodded, holstering his gun as he turned to follow them back to the vehicle.

“Thanks, Ranger. You helped today.” He rubbed over the dogs back just before climbing into the back.

“Alex, why don’t you come drive for a bit. They’ll be looking for me thanks to my ID scan. Liam, flip with Bash. We might be able to trick people into thinking we’ve gone separate ways.”

Everyone shifted without any words, and William moved to sit beside Emma, intertwining his hand back with hers the way it had been before they stopped.

“Are you okay?” she asked softly, her thumb tracing soothing circles on the back of his hand.

William nodded, his gaze finding hers in the dim light of the truck’s interior. “I will be,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “As long as I have you.”

Emma smiled, the warmth of her expression chasing away the chill that had settled in William’s bones. She leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, and for a moment, he hadn’t just killed a man and they weren’t on the run.

In that moment, there was only them, and the love that had become the anchor in the stormy seas of their lives.

William pulled away first, his thoughts drifting to just hours ago when he’d come undone inside of her. Everything had fallen apart so fast.

William turned his gaze to the window, watching as the barren landscape rolled by, a seemingly endless expanse of desolation stretching out before them. The sun hung low on the horizon, painting the sky in shades of orange and red, a stark contrast to the lifeless earth.

With no talking to be had, William was left diving back into his thoughts. He thought of the choices he had made, the lives he had taken, and the toll it had taken on his soul.

“What are you thinking about?” Emma asked, her voice cutting through the silence.

William turned to her, his blue eyes meeting her green ones. “I’m thinking about who I am,” he said, his voice raw with emotion. “About who I want to be. Without the military, I don’t know that I have any skills. Sure I’m good with tech, but not like Alex. Not like Liam too, though his tech is a little more specific.”

Emma reached out, her hand finding his once more. “You’re a good man, William,” she said, her words filled with conviction. “A man who does what he has to do to protect the people he loves.”

William nodded, his throat tight with emotion. “I know,” he said. “But I never want to lose sight of that. I never want to become someone I don’t recognize.”

Someone like Marcus and the safe haven directors . The bitter thought rocked through him and he closed his eyes, knowing that sleep might be the only way to drown it all out.