Page 24 of Whirlwind (Seattle Blades #4)

W e fell asleep gazing into one another’s eyes like a couple of lovesick goobers.

It was the best night of my life, after I came down from the rabid thought processes at the arena.

It’s easy to believe that every new step on my sexual journey is going to be the best time, beating out the last. Because I thought masturbating with him wouldn’t be topped so easily.

In that, I had all the control, which is what I thought I needed for so long. Last night, though, I gave that to him and realized every orgasm I’ve had before was a microdose in comparison.

Analyzing that…it should mean that when we make it far enough for his penis to enter my vagina it will, once again, be the best night of my life. Or maybe morning. Because as I lie here, waking from a few hours of great, deep sleep, I’m horny again.

If his bulging dick is any indication, he’s right there with me.

The blankets have been kicked off. Probably because our bodies were so wrapped up with each other, we didn’t need additional warmth. Even though a chill settles on my skin, now, I don’t pull them back up. The view is very good. Tyson’s body is unreal.

There’s a bruise on his side, fresh from last night’s game. It shouldn’t, but it turns me on more, the proof of his physicality and that he doesn’t make a fuss about it.

Willa always comments about Zander’s “hockey thighs.” I get it now. Tyson’s are thick, tight, and toned. As is the rest of his body. Nothing about him is small or weak. While that would have scared me before, it never has with him. Instead, it makes me feel safer.

Tyson has become a safe space. I’m not sure he understands how profound that is. Perhaps he does, since I think he’s safety for his sister, as well.

It’s been a long time since I’ve felt safe. Or bold. I feel bold right now.

I also really need to fucking pee.

Sneaking out of bed as carefully as I can, I manage it without waking Tyson. After a potty and a toothbrushing, I stare at myself in the mirror. It’s not right that we don’t appear differently after big, life-altering moments. Like, my smile should be brighter, my hair shinier, or my boobs bigger.

It’s not only that I’ve climbed a rung higher on the sexual ladder. Honestly, that’s the least important thing that happened last night. The substantial change is what happened inside me. My inner child stood up to one of the monsters under her bed. There is more to the war, but I won one battle.

It’s something to be proud of, and I am.

Tyson has a discarded T-shirt on the floor of the bathroom.

It smells like him, so I throw it on, and I ride a high as I quietly walk downstairs and let Nightmare out for his own potty break.

It’s early still, barely four in the morning.

After he’s done his business, I pilfer through the kitchen, looking for something to feed my little buddy.

Leave it to a pro athlete to have copious amounts of protein cooked up and ready to grab.

Picking some chicken breast, I shred it up and give it to Nightmare, who happily scarfs it down.

Before I head back upstairs, I grab my cell phone from the bag I discarded by the front door.

At the end of the bed, I watch his chest rising and falling, like I’m a sparkly vampire in that one young adult book.

If it was later in the morning, I’d consider waking him and asking him to…

how do you ask someone for sex? He needs more sleep, though.

I don’t know how professional athletes keep up with their schedules, let alone their training routines.

When I get back on the bed, I keep as much distance as I can.

Not an easy task, since his large frame is sprawled in the center of the bed.

Making sure my volume is silenced, I pull up a favorite porn site of mine.

It’s produced by a woman, so it isn’t filled with videos of women who look too young to be legal or videos that should be reported to authorities.

I’m curious if my preferences have, or will, change.

They should, I think. I mean, I imagine that’s how kinks evolve.

And while my preferences haven’t changed so much since I first started watching porn, they have shifted some.

The first time I watched anything, it was a man pleasuring himself.

That’s still something that turns me on, but eventually, I branched out to couples.

Nothing extreme, or hardcore, or with multiple partners.

Vanilla, mostly.

There have been many times I’ve almost clicked on categories outside of that, but I wasn’t confident in my own mental state to be able to handle it. Since I’ve only ever watched it by myself, there was never anyone there that would be able to help calm me if I got too anxious watching it.

Glancing over at Tyson, I tempt myself with the idea.

Scrolling through my phone, I pick a video I normally wouldn’t.

It’s in the “rough” category. I’m not sure I fully understand what that means, but I won’t ever know if I don’t look.

It starts off the same as so many do, with the normal foreplay of him undressing her.

Except, once he has her naked, his hand finds purchase on her neck.

Not heavily, or overly forceful, but with enough directness to guide her to the bed, where he lays her down with her head hanging over the side.

Quickly, the man unfastens his pants and pulls his dick out.

The woman opens her mouth for him, and he begins thrusting in.

It’s deep and quick, but at the same time, he leans forward to place his mouth on her pussy.

I turn my phone, so the video takes up the whole screen; I want a closer view.

He’s heavy atop her, but he also pauses his fucking of her mouth on occasion to let her swallow and catch air.

That makes it hotter, him showing his concern while also getting what he wants.

One-sided sex isn’t anything I ever want to experience again.

Tyson trying to talk me out of a blow job last night only made him more endearing.

The truth of it is, I enjoyed it. Once I got past being self-conscious about it, anyway.

I’m sure he’s received amazing oral before, I know I can’t compare, but I still made him come.

That alone was a huge boost to my confidence.

He’s still asleep when I scroll to a different video. Then, to another and another. I analyze each of them, looking less for my own pleasure and more to understand or learn techniques, something that never occurred to me before, since I never expected to have a partner.

By the sixth or seventh video, I’m finding a few things that intrigue me. One in particular. It’s another unexpected realization.

“That’s the best one yet,” Tyson says next to me, startling me so much that I drop my phone on the bed between us. He laughs deeply. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

“I thought you were still asleep.”

“Been awake for the last few videos, you pervert.” He rolls toward me, handing me back my phone.

“I couldn’t sleep,” I say, as if that’s enough of an explanation for why I’m watching porn in bed next to him.

“You should have woken me up, I’d have watched with you.” He snakes an arm around my waist and pulls me into him, back to front.

“You need sleep. I was only trying to stay turned on until you woke up, but I kind of fell into a rabbit hole.”

“Again, you should have woken me up. I’m happy to be of service,” he says, kissing the back of my neck. He pulls at my collar, baring my shoulder so he can press kisses there. “Did you see something you liked?”

“Besides the naked hockey player in bed with me? Yes, I think so.”

“What was it?”

I roll around to face him, nervous to say it. Not sure why I liked what I did, or what it says about me that I did.

“I like when he fucks her,” I say timidly. “As opposed to when she fucks him. Does that make sense?”

“Absolutely, it does.”

“Then, why do I feel weird about it?”

“Maybe because you’re looking at it the wrong way,” he says after a moment of thought. “It’s not about him controlling the experience, it’s about him putting in the work.”

“Oh, maybe you’re right,” I say, and ponder what he’s said. Every orgasm I experienced prior to Tyson was solely by me putting in all the work. It is nice to relinquish that, to have someone who wants to bring me pleasure themselves. “Will you…” As bold as I feel, I still can’t say the words.

“Fuck you like that?” he offers easily.

I nod, several times. More times than necessary—I only stop when I start pressing kisses below his chin, the stubble there tickling my lips.

“Yes. The same rules apply, okay? Say the word and I stop whatever I’m doing that makes you uncomfortable.”

“Okay.”

“We haven’t talked about protection, which, in hindsight, seems fucking stupid.”

“I have an IUD that I hate with the fiery passion of the depths of hell, but it serves its purpose,” I say, leaving out the part that it’s protection against predators, not accidents on my part.

“I’ll still use a condom. I haven’t been tested in a few weeks.”

“A few weeks?” I crinkle my nose.

“It’s part of our routine testing with the league,” he says. “I promise, I’m not that big of a slut.”

“I watch Shoresy , you’re all sluts,” I tease, also remembering how many women I saw leaving here before he started showing interest in me.

“She’s brilliant, beautiful, and she watches Shoresy ,” he mutters, reaching behind him to dig through his nightstand. “I’m done for.”

“Is it weird that we talk so much? I mean, during sexy times.”

“I don’t think so. It’s different, but I don’t get turned off by it. The opposite, actually. I like that you’re vocal,” he says, then rips the condom wrapper open with his teeth. He doesn’t pull it out or put it on, yet, just readies it while he watches me watch him. “I want you wet, Kit. Soaking.”

Jesus. If I wasn’t already, those words would have gotten me there.

“Not a problem,” I mumble, my voice raspy.

“Let me see,” he says. His hand snakes under the shirt I wear, landing on my hip, first, then traveling to my center. Instinctively, I spread my legs wider for him to dip a finger in, then another as he curses. “Fucking hell, I love how responsive you are.”

“I’ve been awake with your hard dick for the last ninety minutes, how else was I supposed to respond?”

“If I get my wish, always exactly like this,” he says, coating my clit with my own wetness as he rubs a finger around it. “Kiss me, Kit.”

He leans down, stopping when our noses touch, and waits for me to close the distance.

As soon as I do, his tongue dips between my lips.

He’s warm, soft, and slick. Our tongues fight a battle, neither winning nor losing.

All the while, Tyson continues to play with my pussy.

When I can’t take any more, I moan and hike my leg up over his hip.

He rolls us so I’m atop him, propping me up to sit high on his chest, his hands busy behind me, sliding the condom down into place.

“Lean down for me, Kit. Your eyes stay with me, okay?”

As instructed, I run my hands up his sculpted chest and over his shoulders until they land on either side of his face.

“You ready?”

“More than,” I say truthfully, even as my eyes fill with unwanted water. “Please, Tyson.”

His hands hold the globes of my ass, positioning me where he wants me. Then, I feel his tip at my entrance. I gasp. Not in fear—in anticipation. I don’t look away as he inches farther in. Slowly.

Excruciatingly slowly.

“Tyson.”

“I’m with you, Kit.” He presses kisses all over my face until he’s in as far as he can go. “Is it okay?”

“No, it’s more than that. It’s so much more.” My voice shakes, a tear spills out. “Move, now.”

“Whatever you want,” he says through a wide smile.

Then, he slides out almost all the way. I clench around him, not wanting to lose the connection.

Then, he slides back in, never breaking eye contact.

Keeping us connected in every way. His hips thrust further each time, slowly increasing his speed. Still, he holds me steady.

Doing all the work.

It’s exactly what I asked for. It’s everything I wanted. The friction as he glides in and out of me is amazing, and yet, not enough. Pulling at the T-shirt, I yank it over my head and throw it…I don’t know where, but away.

Skin. I need all of him pressed against all of me.

“Talk to me, Kit,” he says. “What do you feel?”

“Good. It’s so good, Tyson.”

He rolls us again. Laying me on my back, he sits up on his heels. Hands travel over my breasts, down my belly, around my hips.

“The way you take me,” he says quietly, almost as if he’s talking to himself. “Goddamned beautiful, Kit.” He looks from where he’s fucking me, to my face—it’s overwhelming. I want to look away, to hide from the connection that feels too intense. But I don’t. I’ve been doing that for too long.

I’m stronger, now. Braver.

“I need to move, too.”

“Do it, Kit. Get what you need.”

Moving my hips, I match his flow, and we move together.

A dance, delicate and beastly. Graceful but instinctual. I let my mind go and just…be. Just movement. Sex. Sensuality. Touch. Fucking.

When I reach above my head to grab on to his headboard, he clasps one hand on my breast and the other to my clit. That spot he’s getting so familiar with.

“Gorgeous cunt, gorgeous body. I’m fucking a goddess. You gonna come for me, Kit? Explode all over my cock?”

“Oh my God,” I cry.

His dirty mouth does me in, and the next time he applies pressure on my clit; it sends me over the cliff. There is no breathing, no air, no words.

Just a pulsing blood rush staccato. Every muscle tenses; time stands still as I become tiny bits of energy floating in the ether.

Tyson grunts as he starts to follow, and pulls me back into my body, back to the moment and reality.

I pant through it, catching my breath and losing it again when he comes into focus.

Bliss veils him, like he’s experiencing the same ecstasy I am.

That doesn’t seem possible. He’s done this so much more than me.

“Is it like that every time?” I ask when I’m able to find my voice again.

Tyson falls alongside me, removing the condom and tying the end before he drops it to the floor.

“No, but it should be,” he says, craning his head to look at me. “You’re amazing.”

“I didn’t do much.”

“Don’t sell it short. You vanquished a demon,” he tells me, his own eyes misting up.

“Thank you for being my sword,” I say, then wince. “This is a really weird time for me to be imagining a Dungeons and Dragons scenario. Sorry.”

I bury my face in his laughing chest, and he holds me until I doze off.