Page 31

Chapter 30

Adeline

A deline’s neck had healed—a thin scar trailed like a pink choker around her throat, the only evidence that it had been slit. Without fresh blood, though, her healing had taken longer than she wanted, and she still felt weaker than usual. Shadows played at the corners of her vision, and she was growing more familiar with the thought that her mental faculties were slipping. Sitting at the small vanity, she ran a brush through her clean hair, the scent of white amber and jasmine floating around her face with each stroke.

The delicate silver chain around her wrists clinked as she brushed a trail along the fresh tissue at the base of her neck. She hesitated, one of her fingers hovering at her collarbone, toying with opening it with her sharpened nail. She tongued her fangs, staring at the slow pulse in her neck.

If only it were that easy. Was she weak enough that a simple slice would open the fresh tissue up once more? Perhaps. She had never known of a vampire to bleed themselves dry before. Besides, something nagged at the back of her mind as she recalled Juliette’s plea from earlier.

Desperate, Juliette had said.

What does Juliette know of desperation?

She had looked at Adeline with such hope that, for a moment, Adeline had entertained helping. But then Juliette left, and she slipped back into the hopelessness. And now, in the quietness of the room, with a few candles flicking her shadow onto the wall, she wanted to end this nightmare. Just another game of Erik’s, but with what payoff? Why did he want her so badly?

It wasn’t like he couldn’t train someone else to take her place.

She may be one of the oldest vampires, but right now, she was so tired and alone. She was that poor young woman she had been before she was turned. When she had married the prince, against her mother’s wishes. When she had realized, too late, that he wasn’t at all the savior she thought him to be. When she wished that she had been stronger to resist his charms and wiles. When all she wanted was to be back with her mother and sister, in the old mill, next to the forest.

All this time, she thought she had become smarter, stronger. But at what cost? She landed right back in the place she wanted to leave.

She swiped her hands along the top of the vanity table, cursing. Items clattered to the floor, but still, her reflection disgusted her. She wiped away a stray tear. Her mother would know what to do. Her mother always knew what to do.

Stop this pity party and just do it already!

Adeline sighed, her fingernail sharpening to a fine point. It dug into her skin, a blossom of red welling at the tip. But her hand shook. She cursed her image in the mirror and pushed away from it.

Pathetic, spineless fool.

She hung her head in her hands, the chain clinking against her cuffs, and groaned. Just because she couldn’t be with the love of her life didn’t mean that Juliette had to suffer. She had suffered enough on Adeline’s behalf.

I’ve gone soft.

Or maybe she had been soft this whole time, but living under Erik’s thumb, softness was never an option. Instead, she tucked away the gentleness. Buried it under layers of dissociation and ruthless killing as a way to numb her regret.

Maybe this was her chance to do something right after all these years. Adeline would help Juliette get free, no matter what. It would be her atonement.

Atonement . The word rolled around in her head, marinating in her thoughts of Rolf.

Could it be that she never truly deserved the love she always sought? As an assassin, she had never once questioned Erik’s motives. The casualties were just poor souls who had been in the wrong place at the wrong time. But in the past century, out from underneath Erik’s thumb, hunting down were-shifters on his behalf, a seed of discontent had been planted. At first, it was Colin who had shown her that there was more to her immortal life. After he disappeared, when she got a taste of freedom, that was when she realized that she wanted more than just doing the bidding of a power-hungry egomaniac.

And now, that seed of disquiet had grown and sprouted into something more.

The door handle clicked, and she was startled back to the present.

“I’m here to help you get dressed,” Juliette said as she laid a few items down on the vanity and placed a dress on a chaise lounge. Then she grabbed the glass on the vanity and held it aloft. The liquid inside was even thicker, having sat out for a while, and Adeline’s stomach twisted a few times. “Erik requested that you drink this.”

Adeline pursed her lips, not wanting to vomit like she did earlier. “I can’t.”

“You have to, Adeline. He isn’t going to send you a willing, fresh food source—you’d get better too fast.” Worry lined Juliette’s face.

Adeline shook her head, but took the goblet full of old blood. She needed to find a living source of food if she was going to be strong enough to get Juliette out of here. “Fine, but one sip. That’s all.”

She choked it down, gagging as it slid down her throat and landed in her stomach like lead.

Juliette gave her a pained smile and unwrapped a leather mat.

“What jewelry?” she asked and held up an elaborate diamond necklace.

Adeline’s heart raced as she looked at what she was supposed to wear. The dress was a deep blue with a full skirt and a torturously low neckline. It had a full corset with delicate embroidery and pearl accents. On the dresser was an assortment of accessories—a fan, gloves, hairpins, necklaces, earrings.

“None.” Adeline shook her head.

She would leave her neck bare tonight, on full display for everyone to see that she was not ashamed to bear all the marks on her body. Each was a badge of honor for the horrors she had faced, even the ones Erik had carved on her, and she was proud that she had made it through. Her hands skimmed the faded marks on her wrists, where Erik had repeatedly bound her during his many attempts to mold her into his perfect prodigy. At least the initials on her backside would be hidden. She would do what she could to prevent Erik from seeing that she had tried to burn off the other brands decades ago.

“You will look stunning, Adeline,” Juliette assured her. “Erik will be captivated by you.”

“He should be,” Adeline said sourly. “He’s won, after all.”

“He hasn’t won yet,” Juliette said as she helped Adeline into the undergarments. “He just thinks he’s won.”

Adeline nodded solemnly. “And wearing this will convince him even more.”

Juliette’s hands stilled on the ties of the corset. Her breath was cool against Adeline’s neck. “I really am sorry I slit your throat. It was one of my favorite places to…”

“To what? Kiss?” Adeline looked over her shoulder. Juliette’s face was flushed. She forgot how endearing she could be sometimes. In all honesty, Adeline was happy for her. Glad, even. That she had something to look forward to beyond this hellscape. Adeline rubbed her neck, adding, “It’s just flesh. It will heal.”

Juliette cleared her throat and finished tying Adeline in. “Do you have a plan?”

Nope. “I’ve got a few I’m working on.” Adeline spun around and slid her arms into the dress.

Juliette helped straighten the skirts. The satin swished under her quick movements, reminding Adeline of the beating of birds’ wings. Her heart beat rapidly; her time to be with Erik was closing in, and she still hadn’t figured anything out yet.

“So, you don’t have a plan,” Juliette chided. She grabbed the dangling chain and fit it back into the cuff, locking it into place.

Adeline straightened, trying her best to breathe in the stiff corset. “I am working on several angles, Juliette. You’ll just have to trust me.”

“But you won’t share them with me,” Juliette guessed. She grabbed Adeline’s hands, and that pleading look returned to her eyes as she begged, “I’m your ally in this, Adeline. Please tell me what I need to do. I want us to be done with this awful business—I want us to be free .”

Free. Would she ever be free? No, because Juliette had brought her back to this hellhole. And for what purpose? It had taken what felt like forever to free herself from her maker’s manipulation. Not only did she think more clearly when she was out from under his thumb, but Erik had been twisting her reality to his advantage. It had all been a ploy to keep her dependent on him.

“We will be,” Adeline reassured her. She needed Juliette to be on her side, since allies in this place were few and far between. But that didn’t mean she trusted her completely, nor did it help with the immense guilt she felt at leaving Juliette behind.

Tears welled in the corner of Juliette’s eyes, and Adeline squeezed her hands in return. If this had been anyone else, or if Adeline had been her usual assassin self, she would have scoffed at the flagrant display of emotion. Instead, she let Juliette lure her in as if it would help erase the guilt she still carried. “Let me see what he wants tonight and then…”

“Then?” Juliette’s voice was barely a whisper.

Adeline smiled and grabbed the goblet of congealed liquid. Her stomach roiled, but she needed sustenance in some form, and she wouldn’t dare ask Juliette to provide it. Adeline had never fed off one of her own since she was turned. And if Erik realized that Adeline had consumed something other than what was in the goblet, he would catch on to their scheming. She was meant to be under his control, and what better way to pretend it than with a little bit of nausea to add to her act? She had no choice tonight but to enter the lion’s den—a tiny mouse ready to be caught in the claws of a predator.

“The countdown begins,” Adeline whispered. Juliette met Adeline’s gaze, and they both cringed. Adeline plugged her nose as she downed the cup in one swallow. She slammed the empty vessel on the table and nodded for Juliette to lead the way, fighting to keep the thickened liquid from coming back up.