Page 4 of What’s Left of Us (What Left #3)

I drop my head to his shoulder and try to remind myself where I am.

This is Emeric’s house, and my husband Vinny is holding me tight.

It’s familiar, grounding. It reminds me of how hard he clung to me years before, when he was certain I would die in the ICU.

After I woke up, he held me tighter than ever before,

Neither of us are in danger of dying though. Not anymore.

“I - I saw her,” I say, partially speaking to his shoulder. “My mom. In the dream.”

Vinny stiffens, but he keeps tracing his fingers across my skin. The palm against my back flexes but he doesn’t move it, and I’m glad for it. “Porscha.”

He keeps doing that. Saying her name like it distances me from my mother. “Yeah. I had this dream and she morphed into the way she looked when she pretended to be Char. Even my dreams can’t be tricked anymore.”

Vinny hums, resting the side of his face against mine. “What was the dream about?”

I snort, but it sounds like a sob. Like I’m sad, hurting, and I hate it. This isn’t how I want to wake up. “The last day we had together. When I thought Alastair was still the bad guy.”

His fingers stop moving, his grip getting a little tighter. “Jo…”

Blinking, I pull back from him. He lets me go, and I can feel the wetness in my eyes. “God, I should be finished crying about this.”

“You don’t have to be finished,” Vinny reasons, meeting my gaze. His expression doesn’t waver, but it’s severe. His mind is already made up about this. “Porscha being alive changes everything.”

“Like why Alastair is still on death row?” I huff, wiping at my eyes. “He can’t be at fault for everything. He shouldn’t be the only one responsible if she’s guilty too. What’s taking the FBI so long?”

Vinny purses his lips. “It’s only been a few days-”

“Five,” I correct, crossing my arms. I’ve managed to untangle myself from the sheets by now, and I stand up as we stare at each other. “Five since the cabin.”

“Since we were all four together,” he clarifies, and I nod in agreement. “He didn’t wake up until late the next day after surgery, according to Xeno. I don’t know if he was well enough to even talk to anyone, Jo. They have Porscha to pick apart if they want answers sooner.”

Scoffing, I shake my head. “It’s so nice that your brother just happens to know some of the nurses there.”

He gives me a tight smile. I never asked too many questions about Vinny’s involvement with Massimo’s people.

He wasn’t interested in taking over the family legacy, and at the time when Massimo was up his ass there was a lot going on in Citrus Grove - like a killer and my mother acting stranger and stranger.

He never really spoke about it. Even after all these years, he’s only ever disclosed so much about the Ajello Family.

I know they do a lot of illegal shit. Drug deals, moving guns, using the orange grove as a cover for the real business…

over the years Vinny’s given me a cliff notes version and I never looked into how dark it really went.

If Xeno is rising up to eventually take control from his father, I shouldn’t be that surprised that he has casual connections in a hospital in Tallahassee.

What does it do for him exactly? I have no real idea, but I imagine it comes in handy if the family gets into too much trouble.

“Xeno has good connections,” Vinny tells me after a moment, standing from the bed. “He’s careful to not burn bridges that Massimo might overlook. You never know who you might end up needing to know.”

“Well could he find someone willing to let us into the hospital room?” I grumble. “We haven’t seen Alastair since the cabin. I want to know he’s okay.”

“He has a bad infection,” Vinny reminds me. “Real bad. He’s going to continue receiving treatment for a while.”

“That doesn’t help us now,” I groan, rubbing my face.

My gaze drifts to the bathroom, towards the medicine cabinet above the sink, and not for the first time this week I really wish I knew where Vinny hid my sleep meds.

As much as I don’t like them, I’ve been craving them the past five days.

“How long will they keep him there before he’s sent back to CGP? ”

Vinny shrugs, and I know he doesn’t have answers for me. As much as I need them, the only person who might be helpful is Sterling and he’s a hard man to get a hold of.

We’ve texted, but none of us will risk sending something incriminating through a message.

Sleeping with a serial killer on the run looks bad on all three of us.

I don’t care about the repercussions myself per say, but I don’t want it to end up damning Alastair further or even cause Sterling to lose his job.

So far as Vinny and I are concerned, we wouldn’t have as much to fight if that did get out.

They could throw out my testimony from the original trials if it went that far, but is that really a bad thing? I don’t want to incriminate Alastair anymore. The only person ever threatening us was Sterling, and it was a thin threat about outing our club.

I’m positive that he’s not planning on that any longer. Why else did he sleep with all of us? Granted, that was never a plan, but I’m not mad about how it worked out.

And then Alastair went and ruined it. Who does he think he’s protecting now?

“Xeno is coming over,” Vinny continues, drawing my attention once more. “Just to check in on us.”

My eyes narrow ever so slightly. I don’t have a problem with Xeno by any means, but the past three days he’s appeared more and more, which is unusual considering how busy he seemed for the past few months.

Now suddenly, after Alastair is caught for a second time, he has all this extra space to visit us?

“Is there a reason?” I ask slowly, glancing down at myself.

I can’t see the scars, and knowing that Xeno is going to show up doesn’t necessarily prompt me to get dressed.

He’s polite, but Xeno comes almost exclusively to speak to Vinny.

It’s hard to tell if it’s friendly visits, family matters, or something to do with the case.

Vinny shrugs when I glance back at him. “He’s checking in.”

“Nothing’s going to happen,” I snap, meeting his gaze. “All of our problems are locked up now. Right?”

He hesitates, pursing his lips. “Right.”

“You would tell me if there was something else?” I ask slowly, studying him. “Wouldn’t you?”

“There’s nothing else to worry about,” Vinny tells me, moving forward to cup my face. “Until Alastair talks, they can’t move forward. And he has to know that. Porscha was always very unreliable. They can’t just take one’s word against the other’s.”

I shrug out of his grip, moving towards the bathroom. For the first time in years, I feel like Vinny isn’t telling me the whole truth. And I don’t know what to make of that when we are always united, especially about this. “Whatever you say.”

“Jo-”

“I’m just going to take a shower,” I tell him, glancing back at the bathroom door. Part of me still wants to dig the pills out and take another late-afternoon nap, but it won’t do me any good. I’m certain Vinny didn’t hide those in here. “Wash away the dream.”

I can hear his frustrated sigh as I close the door, but if Vinny won’t be truthful with me I can’t play this game with him.

I know his brother has access to a lot of things, probably more than I want to know about, but it doesn’t change anything.

We are supposed to tell each other everything so nothing comes between us.

And at this point, I can’t imagine what Vinny is hiding.