Page 35 of What’s Left of Us (What Left #3)

“You got a little tan,” Callie says, locking her arm through mine as we walk through the airport.

Despite buying things in Florida the last six months, we shipped most of it back so it’ll arrive at the house in a few days.

There’s nothing to claim from baggage, and Vinny has my carry on so I’m just holding my purse.

Callie and Nate offered to pick us up. Usually they are at the club most nights of the week, but they’re more our friends than our employees at this point.

I’ve known Nate longer than I have Callie, and they’re both really good people.

Good enough to help Emeric and Serenity adjust when we needed interim management and didn’t want to force our friends to take on the role.

I let Callie chatter, her heels clicking on the floor as we walk. It looks like hell wearing those stick-thin heels across an airport, but I’ve rarely ever seen Callie without her stilettos. She easily keeps pace with me, and as we walk she drags a finger down my arm.

“I’ve never seen you without the layers,” she says thoughtfully, and I shoot her a look.

Her light eyes study me curiously, lacking judgment.

She’s known about the marks for a long time, but she’s never questioned me about them.

She knows they’re from my past, and never pushed to know more. “You look good.”

“Thanks,” I tell her, but my heart isn’t in it. There’s no joy in being back. I only went to Florida to save my club from the FBI prying into people’s lives, and I’ve more than accomplished that. But I left behind far more in Florida than I gained.

Vinny and Nate walk a few paces behind us, keeping their voices low.

I don’t know what they are talking about, and I haven’t really cared.

It’s dark now in Denver, and the lack of sun feels very symbolic to how I’m seeing the future.

No Alastair, no Sterling, no feeling of joy in regards to coming home.

I have Vinny, and I always will. But we’ve both left behind so much coming back here.

“Serenity did a good job keeping things in line,” Callie goes on, and I just nod to her. She’s trying to be helpful but I can’t focus. “She’s nitpicky but she kept things on track. Emeric likes working with her.”

“He more than likes her,” I say, shooting Callie a look. She bursts out laughing, and I force a smile back. She’s so happy to have me here, and I just can’t match it.

“We’ve got everything set for your homecoming,” Callie continues, leading me into the parking lot.

I hate DIA because of the size, but she assured me that we wouldn’t need to mess with the airport shuttle because they were able to park close.

“We haven’t made a formal announcement or anything to the club members yet, Serenity said that it was your call when you wanted to make a fuss about being back.

Emeric is totally on board handling things for another month if you two want to settle in. ”

“Callie,” Nate calls behind us, and I don’t even turn when she does. “That’s a tomorrow problem.”

“Oh hush,” Callie sighs, leading me to the next row of cars. “You aren’t expected to do anything, you know. We’re just being selfish and happy you’re back. The club’s doing great but it’s different without you two.”

We pass under a light and I shoot her a smile.

We were gone months longer than planned, and when Vinny mentioned to Emeric that we would be gone until probably the end of summer, I don’t think they really thought we meant the end of July.

It was supposed to be earlier than that if things worked out, but then Alastair died.

I don’t know why I bother thinking about it, because it makes my heart ache. My feet catch on the pavement and I stop walking, glaring down at the dark ground. I don’t want to cry out here because then our friends are going to panic, and they’ll start asking questions.

I never told Callie that Alastair died. She didn’t even know him; neither did Nate. I didn’t tell anyone, and I basically shut out my friends since the beginning of June. If we weren’t living in Emeric’s home and the case didn’t involve his foster brother, I probably would’ve shut him out too.

“Jo?”

Nodding, I don’t look at her. I’m not sure what I want to say, except I didn’t picture coming back to Denver like this.

In a perfect world, right now I’d be introducing them to Alastair, or telling them about how we changed his fate.

How we did something instead of standing there watching while he died.

Callie drops my arm and steps in front of me, gripping my chin until I look at her. In her heels we’re almost the same height, but she’s just a smidge taller. “Don’t cry out here. Cry in the car. When it’s just us to see.”

Glancing around, I wonder what she knows that I don’t.

But she doesn’t waste any time, locking her arm through mine again as she practically drags me to Nate’s truck.

She doesn’t give Vinny a chance to intervene even if he would.

I tighten my arm around hers until we’re in the truck, sliding into the backseat.

Callie sits with me, basically shutting the door on the guys so they have to sit up front.

Then she turns to me, her eyes hard. “I don’t know if anyone would care if they saw you or not. But every once in a while the news stations play an article about the CGS case, especially over the last few weeks since Constantine died.”

“Alastair,” I say, blinking when I feel my eyes watering. God, I am going to cry in the back of this truck. “His name was Alastair.”

Her eyes soften as the front doors open, and the interior lights stay on. “Of course. Alastair. Al . That’s how Emeric addressed him a couple times. I just don’t think anyone should see your pain if they are snooping.”

“No one should even know we’re back,” Vinny says from the front seat. “We purposefully booked the flights late because of that.”

The truck turns on before Nate speaks. “I’ll get you home and you two can sleep the night away.”

I close my eyes. Home is supposed to be the place you run to, but I can’t think of anything less appealing right now. The delusional part of my head wants to imagine my Nightmare and my Agent waiting for me there, but I know neither is a reality.

If I open my eyes I might see Vinny’s pain, and I’m afraid of what that looks like. “Take us to the club instead.”

For a moment, the car is silent. Then Nate clears his throat. “Uh, are you sure?”

“It’s a half hour from here,” I say, keeping my eyes closed. “Maybe less at this hour. It’s less driving than going to our home.”

“You don’t have a car there-” Nate begins.

“We’ll figure that part out,” Vinny says, his voice hard. He’s already decided without speaking to me that he’ll be on my side. He’s not even asking why I want to go to the club; he’s accepted that I need to be there instead of in our home right now.

The car moves without another word, and after a few moments I open my eyes. There’s light to my left, and I glance over to see Callie typing out something on her phone.

She catches my gaze, sending off whatever it is before locking the screen. “Just letting Emeric know. They were closing up.”

“At ten?” Vinny asks, and it sounds strange to me too. “In the summer we usually keep the doors open until midnight-”

“They were scheduling a deep clean,” Callue cuts in, and for some reason that sounds like a lie. “You know, we could use one. Daily cleaning and upkeep is fine, but a deep clean is due. They thought they’d deal with that for you.”

I narrow my eyes, wishing I could see more of her features in the dark.

Dragging my gaze to the front, I find Vinny is still looking back too, eyeing her.

It’s not something we’d really have to approve since profits are good, but Serenity at least emailed us with plans like that so we were in the loop. We had heard nothing about this.

“Emeric says he’ll drop a car off for you to use,” Callie says when her phone flashes again. “So you can stay however long you need.”

Nodding, I turn away. It feels forced, weird. There’s no particular reason why they wouldn't just tell us ahead of time that they closed the club for cleaning; she’s right, it’s necessary and expected. I don’t know why they’re acting weird about it.

Maybe the quiet will be nice. Then if I cry, no one will be around to overhear except for Vinny.

I watch the lights of Denver roll by as Nate navigates I-25, trying to get my mind in order.

I don’t want to think about business or upkeep or freaking cleaning; I just want to go to the place I built with Vinny when I thought the world was forever dimmed.

It feels like a sick joke that we’re returning from Florida without Alastair for a second time.

“Do you think it’s a good area?”

Vinny paces the length of the room. It’s a massive building; a bigger commitment than we expected. I think the area looks okay, but we’ve only been in Denver for a little over a year and we haven’t looked into real estate very much.

We never made it to Boulder. There was a house on the market in the Denver metro area that someone outbid us for, and the realtor suggested this place with hills, space, and a view to fucking die for. I couldn’t move anywhere else once I saw that.

So the club has to be here. It’s bittersweet building something I planned with Alastair without him, but the dream still exists even if he doesn’t.

“I think you’ll get a ton of foot traffic,” the realtor tells us. “You could have signs outside and open a bar area down here at the entrance-”

“This isn’t a regular bar,” I interrupt, crossing my arms. “We aren’t interested in foot traffic. It’s going to be by invitation and pre-approval only. It would help keep people safer.”