Page 1 of Weston & Cyrus (Beautiful Shame #6)

Weston

Somehow the whole situation had gotten completely out of hand and I was blaming it on the troublemaker being fully clothed.

Clearly, I had an unexplored kink for suit porn and it was getting me in trouble. He was much more distracting in a fancy suit than I’d ever imagined but that was probably because I’d only seen him half-naked and in heels up until this point.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea, Conner.” For one thing, Cyrus was my friend and didn’t see me in the naked and doing stuff together category, and for another, I’d never explained about the weird kink thing. “He’s not—”

Shit.

He’d been entirely too close or Conner had been louder than I’d realized.

Maybe both.

“You screeched?” His laid-back smirk and teasing had Conner rolling his eyes, but he didn’t seem frustrated. “What’s Wessie done already?”

Ugh.

“Stop calling me that here. It sounds like I’m a Pomeranian.” I was that annoying sometimes but I didn’t bite and I listened better than his mother’s miscreant mutts. “He misunderstood something. Go away and find someone to talk to.”

Considering we were at a BDSM club, with anyone else I probably should’ve said something naughtier, but Cyrus wasn’t that kind of guy. He was a chat in public and seduce in private kind of guy but he loved the atmosphere at the club and all the interesting people.

He was definitely the people person between the two of us.

“I’m talking to someone.” The big lug seemed to think his purpose in life was to drive me insane because he walked around the small seating area and sat down on the couch next to Conner, his muscular body dwarfing Conner’s as he stretched out to take up the space without thinking about it. “What can I do for you?”

Get a life and go somewhere else so I wouldn’t die of embarrassment.

Ugh.

Okay, too mean and I didn’t really feel that way.

But fuck…I was hard already.

Damn humiliation kink.

The little smirk Conner flashed at me said he knew what I was thinking but that was because he was not only the owner of the club but some kind of psychic creature who was pretending to be human so he could read my mind.

Or the way I was squirming.

Telling myself to sit still, I took a breath and dropped my voice to a whisper so no one else could hear us. “Yellow, Conner. You know this wasn’t what I was aiming for.”

I was not supposed to do anything to humiliate myself in front of Cyrus because getting turned on in front of him was never the goal.

He was my friend.

The sexy lug who could bench-press small cities was just my friend.

We did not get turned on or distracted because our friend’s muscles bulged every time they moved.

Keeping that playing on repeat in the back of my head like I’d done for the past three years, I glared at Conner and did my best to ignore the way Cyrus’s eyes had gone wide. “He and I are friends and you know that.”

Thankfully, Conner listened to my safeword and didn’t spill any secrets, but I wasn’t sure what he’d do next.

After a few seconds, he let a breath out slowly and leaned back against the couch.

“I won’t share anything personal, but…but you were asking me for something I can’t give you with a stranger involved.

It has to be someone you know, and you know Cyrus the best.”

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck.

“Then I’ll leave it alone for now.” I’d figure out a way to play with the fantasy once I found a Dom who didn’t think I was insane or that wasn’t insane himself. “Next time please make that clear before you involve anyone else in a conversation.”

He’d done it on purpose but for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why.

I could, however, change the subject dramatically, so I focused on Cyrus, who looked confused. “I thought you were going to go see what was happening in the back.”

He liked the small stages that were set up to show different demonstrations and scenes. It was a fun way to pass the time and he usually ended up finding someone to talk to, so he should’ve been having fun and nowhere near me.

Conner was watching silently for once, but Cyrus swallowed hard and frowned like he still had no idea what he’d walked into. “Um, they had to switch up the schedule at the last minute and were doing things I wasn’t into.”

Impact play.

Cyrus was big enough he had a fear of hurting someone smaller than him, so he generally avoided any kind of impact play scenes if they had paddles or anything like that. He was good with spankings but that was where his comfort zone left the building.

“Oh.” Well, fuck. Change of plans. “How about we go get dinner instead? You like the Italian place down the street.”

And I was in great need of a severe carb fix at the moment because I’d been telling myself for weeks that Conner would be able to help and I was at the end of my rope.

Conner was blinking silently still, definitely processing and probably plotting, but I was still irritated at him, so I ignored him. Cyrus must’ve realized it too because he didn’t look in the asshole’s direction either. “Sure.”

I’d known coming with him to the club would be a bad idea, but we always came together and I’d thought it would’ve made the situation stand out worse if I’d switched that out.

Obviously not.

The universe was fucking with me because I liked being humiliated.

It was an asshole too.

But as we stood up, asshole number one finally spoke. “I’m sorry I made the wrong call. It won’t happen again and I’ll do my best to keep thinking about what you asked.”

No.

Just no.

“I’m good.” Trusting him wasn’t the issue even though his wince said he thought it was. “I’m not angry at you.”

Not much anyway.

“I just realized you were right.” Asking him to help me find someone to watch me on hidden cameras in my house was a stupid idea…stupid but still a hot one. It probably fell into the some things were only meant to be fantasies category.

It would’ve been easier if I’d clicked with any of the Doms at the club but it hadn’t worked out at all. They all felt more like brothers even though I’d tried talking to a lot of them, and the handful that hadn’t felt like family weren’t into humiliation at all.

At all.

“I’m not sure I want to be right in this case.” Frowning, he sighed as he rose, still as graceful as if he’d been in heels and a dress. “Do me a favor and go grab me a water from the bar before you leave?”

It was clearly a stall tactic, so I raised one eyebrow and glanced between the two men. Cyrus seemed to be bouncing between guilt and confusion, but I couldn’t read Conner as well even when he sighed and rolled his eyes. “Nothing personal about what we talked about. I promise.”

He was an asshole sometimes and a drama queen all the time, but he wasn’t a liar, so I nodded. “After I grab my keys and stuff from the locker room.”

I’d give them privacy, but not for long.

They had less than three minutes for me to get my shit and get back to them, but Conner took the whole time being dramatic.

He was waving his arms around looking incensed about something.

Cyrus was still frowning. There was drama oozing out of both of them, just in different ways, and I wasn’t sure I liked it.

I liked not knowing what they were discussing even less.

What the fuck had they done?

The walk had given me enough space that I was slightly less pissed and definitely less turned on, but confusion and frustration were settling in. I really didn’t like either of those emotions and had to fight the urge to let my drama take over as well.

“Are you two done?” Done losing their shit? Done bitching? Done putting on a show for everyone in the club lounge? “Here’s the water you didn’t need.”

Conner rolled his eyes but took the bottle of water gracefully. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” After pleasantries had been exchanged and most people had stopped watching their performance, I sighed. “And?”

Conner folded his arms over his chest, making the suit thing even more distracting. “And Cyrus has something to tell you.”

I couldn’t decide if Cyrus wanted to roll his eyes or start arguing with Conner again, but after a few moments, he nodded slowly.

“I asked Conner for help with something and it…it seems to have blended in a bit too much with whatever you were talking to him about. So he wasn’t trying to overshare. It was an accident.”

How?

Just how?

Nope.

“Fine.” That didn’t mean I was going to ask any questions, though. “Dinner?”

Food would hopefully sound good by the time we got to the restaurant.

At the moment, my stomach was rebelling and didn’t like the stress it couldn’t explain.

Ignoring things I didn’t want to address was my superpower, though, so I turned to Conner.

“Can we leave my car here until we’re done with dinner? ”

It was kind of rude, but there’d been plenty of parking earlier, so I wasn’t surprised when he nodded. “I owe you that at the very least.”

“Nah, we’re good.” Because otherwise I’d have to ask questions…or worse…self-reflect.

Conner gave me a skeptical look like he knew what I was thinking but he didn’t directly call me out on it. “You guys need to talk. Desperately. And before I’ll let you do anything else interesting here.”

Fuck.

Did he actually have a reason for driving me crazy?

I wasn’t poking that with even a fifty-foot pole, so I ignored it and turned to Cyrus. “Let’s go.”

I needed carbs and dessert to make up for not getting anything I’d come to the club for and for getting my fantasies dashed with reality.

“Sure.” Cyrus seemed content to leave but he wasn’t big on confrontation, so that didn’t surprise me.

For a Dom, he was the least aggressive guy I’d ever met, but Doms came in all flavors like subs did.

I simply had to keep reminding myself that my flavor wasn’t as fucked as I imagined it was sometimes. “Let’s go.”

Yep, just two buddies hanging out.

Nothing odd going on.

No weird conversations.

No possible oversharing.

No having to explain why humiliation turned me on or why I wanted someone to watch me.

Nope.

Nothing odd at all.

“God. It’s painful.” Shaking his head, Conner decided to go back to full drama queen mode and marched off through the lounge. I had a feeling he was going to track down his Dom, the other owner of the club, and I was glad I didn’t have to stay around for that.

I wasn’t sure if he needed a punishment or a hug, but it was definitely not my problem.

“I think I’m going to get the alfredo.” I was more than ready to shift the conversation as we headed toward the front of the building, but Cyrus had the nerve to sigh.

For fuck’s sake.

“What about you?” Food. We were going to talk about food. “You mentioned wanting chicken parmesan the other day.”

His muscles required a lot of fuel and I knew it was something he’d like, but the asshole sighed again.

Someone just needed to kill me.

“I know you’re ready to change the topic and pretend none of this ever happened, but I can’t do that.” Cyrus had a stubborn nice-guy side that was going to make me strangle him at some point. “I need to clear the air, and then if you still want to go to dinner, we can do that.”

Fuck.

Fuck.

Fuck.

“Afterwards, we can even pretend none of this happened if that’s what you want.” Cyrus stopped as we got close to the main doors, escape barely out of reach. “And if you need me to get a cab or ride home from someone else, that’s fine too.”

For fuck’s sake.

Wait.

Why would I be mad at him for me being a weird screwup?

God. Thinking was entirely too hard and so was I.

Again.

“I don’t like this and I’m not afraid to use my colors.” I really didn’t like being backed into corners…well…in reality, with the right person I did…but not in conversations that weren’t going to end in orgasms. “Let’s just get food.”

“If you safeword I’ll respect that, but I’m not going to ride home with you.

It would mean you’re a lot more upset than I think you are and I’m not going to continue to stress you out.

” Cyrus was patient as my mental fucks started softly spilling out and he completely ignored them.

“We can come back to this when you’re ready because you’re important to me. ”

Why was this something he was going to be stubborn about?

“I’m starting to hate this club.” I couldn’t be too frustrated with him but I wasn’t going to stop being dramatic anytime soon. “Fine. Let’s sit down.”

No one ever took the seats by the door, so I marched over and found two seats for us right away. “Go on.”

Cyrus actually smiled for a second before he sighed and let me get away with being obnoxious.

“Alright. I asked Conner to help me approach you for a scene. I wasn’t sure what it should look like because I knew there was something you’ve been rolling over in your head, so when you talked to him, I think he felt it was the perfect time for my conversation too. ”

Wait.

What?

He.

We.

What?