Page 53 of Warrior's Cross

“That’s good. What are you doing right now?”

“Playing with the puppies while Miri fixes me some lunch. Jean-Michel sent over all my favorites, enough food for an army.”

The line was silent for some time. “She’s treating you well?”

While Cameron was mostly used to Julian’s long pauses, he was also accustomed to having Julian in front of him when they occurred. It was hard enough to decipher Julian’s emotions in person. On the phone, it was virtually impossible. So the pause and the question caught Cameron off guard.

“Yeah, she’s great,” he answered sincerely. “I could probably even get her to do my laundry.”

“Good.” The word had so many meanings when Julian said it, depending on the way he said it or the look in his eyes. Cameron realized this was the first time he’d ever spoken to his lover on the phone. He wasn’t sure he liked it.

“Uh-huh,” Cameron responded, shaking his head a little. “Any particular reason you ask?” he asked carefully.

Another quiet spell met Cameron’s query. “I’m afraid to tell you,” Julian mumbled.

“Why?” Cameron asked slowly. Their last conversation had been very emotional, something unusual for Julian, and Cameron still thought about it with some shiver of foreboding. He found himself wary of asking questions now, and when he did, more and more hesitant to ask anything that Julian might not answer.

“Because you’ll laugh at me,” Julian told him with a slight huff. “I’m jealous,” he admitted. “I can make soup,” he muttered. He sounded uncharacteristically cranky.

Cameron stayed quiet for a long moment as he reveled in the happiness those words gave him. Julian didn’t talk about himself much at all, and he rarely, if ever, admitted to many emotions or faults. “I’m not laughing,” he said gently.

“Yeah, you are,” Julian grumbled. “You sound better,” he added.

Cameron thought a smile was evident in his voice.

“I feel better,” Cameron agreed. “Except—”

“What?” Julian asked.

“I miss you,” Cameron said. “This is the longest I’ve gone without seeing you in months.”

“I miss you too,” Julian responded immediately, though he didn’t offer an excuse for his absence.

Cameron smiled happily. “Two more days to get through until Tuesday.”

The silence stretched on. Then finally, “I’ve got to go out of town Monday. I may not be back.”

The disappointment hit Cameron hard, like a physical blow. “As long as you mean may not be back by Tuesday rather than may not be back at all,” he said, a quiver in his voice.

“Of course,” Julian affirmed hastily. “I’m going to try, but... it could be very late.”

“Just be careful. Please. Better late than never, right?” Cameron said in a hushed voice as he gripped the handset.

“Of course,” Julian repeated. “Cameron,” he added hesitantly.

“What I do... I’m not the one in danger, usually,” he informed him softly. “You know that, right?”

Cameron closed his eyes, some little frightened part of him inside easing its grip around his heart. “I’d hoped so,” he whispered. “Didn’t know for sure.”

Again, Julian fell silent. It was frustrating, wondering what he might be thinking as the line buzzed with dead air.

“You tell Miri to take care,” Julian finally said. “And you. Be healthy when I get back.”

“I haven’t told her about you,” Cameron said reluctantly.

“Do you want to?”

Cameron looked up and across the room to where she puttered in the kitchen as the microwave hummed. He sighed. “I don’t know. I know you very much value your privacy.”