Page 46 of Unwritten Rules (The Sunburnt Hearts #1)
Chapter Twenty-Two
SINNETT
G etting back into the regular training schedule after taking it easy the past six weeks and following a limited recovery plan is fucking brutal.
I had forgotten how gruelling it can be on your body, taking the big hits and running drills for hours, that I’m fucked by the time I drag my ass to the locker room.
I slump down on the bench and reach for my water bottle, chugging the contents of it as if it’ll help my lungs from giving out on me.
I reach around my back and pull my training jersey out from the waistband of my shorts.
The material is cool against my skin as I wipe away the sweat and dirt clinging to each pore.
Footsteps sound in the otherwise empty room, drawing my attention from the real fear I might be dying to the man who mirrors my features. He’s dressed in one of his black tailored suits, hands shoved into the pockets of his pants while his dark hair is styled neatly with far too much gel.
Dad eyes me from across the room, and my back stiffens.
Fuck . Here we go.
“Want to tell me why I had to hear from Phil you were cleared to play and not my own son?”
After pulling my jersey over my head, I shove a hand through my sweat-soaked hair and exhale a sharp breath. I’m regretting my decision to step away from training—at the suggestion of Todd so as not to aggravate my quad before the game tomorrow night—for a ten-minute water break.
“I’ve been busy this week,” I grunt, trying to keep my voice even.
The truth is as simple as I didn’t want to tell him because I knew he would act like this . Ready to control me like the puppet I’ve always been to him.
“I can see that,” Dad retorts, stepping towards me. Each slap of his shoe against the floor sets my nerves further on edge. “But it shits me that I had to wait until the day before your return to hear the good news.”
My conversation with Tatum from three nights ago echoes in the back of my mind.
I revealed to her my father’s inability to express his support for me and my career.
At that moment, I hadn’t planned on telling her, but as usual, her easygoing attitude and calming presence brought it out of me, and I was helpless to fight it.
Her words made me realise that I’ve spent far too long living in my father’s shadows, hoping I can one day live up to the standard he has been seeking ever since I started playing rugby. I’m starting to wonder if he’ll ever be proud of my achievements or if he’ll continue to wish for more from me.
“Well, surprise, I’m cleared to play,” I deadpan, jaw ticking. “Happy?”
“Sinnett,” Dad scolds, brows creasing into a frown. “What the hell has gotten into you these past few weeks? All you do is back-chat your mother and I when we try to talk to you, and don’t even get me started on how you react when we bring up your sister.”
I focus on my breathing and not the anger pooling in my veins. If I give in to his baiting and fight back, it’ll do nothing but prove him right, and I refuse to give him the satisfaction.
“I’m fine, Dad,” I say through gritted teeth. “I just don’t need you and Mum breathing down my neck every second of every day.”
“We’re only trying to be supportive of you, especially with your injury.” Dad sighs and shakes his head. “I thought I raised you and Mia better than to turn your back on family when all we’re trying to do is look out for you.”
Breathe, Sin.
If you fight back, it’ll only make things worse.
“I’m not doing this with you,” I bite out, flexing my hands on my thighs. “I’m busy.”
Dad’s jaw clenches, his features tight as if he’s weighing if he wants to continue pushing me or let it go.
Deep down, I hope he chooses wrong so I can let go of everything I’ve been holding onto for years, but I know it would leave behind a wound that can’t be fixed.
I’m not sure now is the right time to play that hand.
He rolls his tongue in his cheek and nods, taking a step back. “Fine. But this conversation isn’t over, Sin.”
“Wonderful,” I murmur, holding his gaze.
“Your mother and I will see you at the game tomorrow,” he continues, ignoring my sarcastic remark.
“With it being your first match back, you better be on your A-game, Sin. Everyone will be watching you. Your teammates are going to rely on you to get them a win, so you better be sure you live up to the standard.”
Fucking hell. If I wasn’t already feeling the pressure before, now I’m being crushed by an expectation I’m not sure I can maintain, especially returning after an injury.
“I’ll do my best,” I squeeze out past the lump in my throat. Dad doesn’t say goodbye; he simply nods before turning to leave the room, passing Khai as he enters.
Am I going to be the same player I was before I got injured?
What if I hurt my quad again?
What if I let the team and the club down?
My chest aches from the earlier training and the conversation with my dad, but I can’t let on to Khai just how fucking worried I am about returning to the field.
My best friend drops onto the bench beside me, gripping his water bottle. His training jersey is smeared with grass stains and dirt, mirroring mine.
“God, that was fucking rough,” he groans, slumping forward with his elbows resting on his dirt covered knees. “I swear Todd was tougher on us because you’re back and needs to whip you into shape.”
“Either way, I think he destroyed a part of my soul,” I grunt, and heave in a lung full of air.
“Is everything okay with your dad?” Khai asks, lifting his head, pale green eyes filled with curiosity. “He looked kinda pissed just now.”
My jaw clenches. “Everything is fine. He came by to see how I was adjusting to being back at training.” I don’t want to bum my friend out with the truth.
Khai regards me for a moment, as if searching for a sign that shows I’m lying. If he looks hard enough, he might find it.
He smiles, warming the ice that has found its way into my veins.
“It’s good to have you back, man. I don’t think the rest of the guys will admit it, but we’ve been a little lost these past six weeks without you.
Jace has been playing well, and we’ve only lost two games, but still.
We felt the lack of your presence out there. ”
Can this fucker read my mind? With how well we know each other, it wouldn’t surprise me if he developed a sixth-sense that allows him to read my thoughts through my expressions.
I exhale a sharp breath and clap him on the shoulder. “You better not be fucking with me right now.”
My best friend snorts a laugh. “Me? I would never, Sin. But I’m serious. We’re all looking forward to having you out on that field tomorrow night.”
Despite the turmoil of doubt sweeping through my veins, I manage a smile. “I’m looking forward to getting back out there.”
The rest of the team files into the room—conversations bounce off the walls and music from someone’s speaker wraps around me.
Ever since Tatum told me the proper way of listening to music—to feel each lyric and relate them to a personal experience—it’s all I do in my spare time.
When I’m not with Khai in the gym or sticking to the training schedule, I’m in my room listening to the playlist she created for me.
I often find myself wondering the kinds of playlist she would listen to, and if they’re anything like what she makes for me.
I don’t know how she did it, but each song feels curated to my life somehow.
I’ve spent hours with the playlist on repeat, allowing each song to delve deeper into my bones and reach my soul.
It’s at the point where I know each song by heart and have an experience I can relate to the lyrics.
Even now as “She’s Got Issues” by The Offspring seeps into the walls of the room, all I can think about is my time with Zoe.
Khai repeatedly warned me not to go there with her because she is possessive and manipulative, but my stupid ass didn’t listen.
Instead of thinking with my head, I thought with my dick, and look at where it’s gotten me.
Speaking of the devil, my phone lights up on the bench beside me with multiple un-read text messages from Zoe.
ZOE: I wish you would stop ignoring me, Sin. I’m not letting this go.
ZOE: Come on, Sin. Don’t you remember all of the good times we had? I know I do. In fact, I think about them every night before bed.
ZOE: Do you think about me?
ZOE: Please, Sin. Don’t make me beg for your attention.
I run a hand through my hair and toss the phone into my gym bag at my feet.
“You’ve gotta block her number, man,” Khai says, eyes flicking between me and her number I, for some strange reason, haven’t blocked yet. “Is there a reason you haven’t?”
“I know it’ll piss her off more if I block her,” I grunt. “It’s not a battle I’m willing to fight yet.”
“Why not?” he questions with a frown.
I run a hand through my hair. “It’s complicated. Zoe isn’t one to back down from something she sets her mind to, and given I don’t know how far she’s willing to take this, I don’t want to poke the bear.”
“Well, I’ll save you the hassle and do it for you.”
Before I can stop my friend, he’s on his feet with my phone in hand.
“Khai!”
Khai darts out of the room and into the adjoining training space we use before games. With his fingers tapping away at the screen, I’m helpless to stop the damage he’s undoubtedly causing for me.
Standing in the open space, I watch as a grin slips onto Khai’s face. He tosses the phone at me, and I barely manage to catch it before it drops at my feet.
“All done.” He claps me on the shoulder as he passes by, acting as if he hasn’t rattled the viper that’s been waiting to strike from the edge of darkness. “You’re welcome.”
“Khai,” I hiss, slipping the device into my pocket. “Do you have any idea what you just did?”
“Yeah, I saved your ass.” Ignoring the rest of the guys hanging out by their locker space, Khai drops onto the bench in front of our spaces with a smug grin.
I drag my hand through my hair and release a pained sigh. “Zoe is going to be fucking pissed about this.”
“Good,” Khai quips with a shrug. “Maybe she’ll get the hint then.”
“No, not good, idiot.” I groan and drop my head into my hands.
“Keeping the line of communication open was my only way of not getting on her bad side. As much as I don’t want to be with her in any way, I don’t need the woman to rain hellfire on me, man.
And now that you’ve blocked her number, severing the only source of communication she has over me, she’s going to do everything in her power to make me suffer. ”
If there is one thing I know about Zoe, it’s that she’s as ruthless as they come.
She once made one of her teammates cry because the girl was out of sync in the dance routine.
Zoe accepts nothing short of perfection, and the poor girl had to suffer the consequences of her iron tongue and cruel words.
It was hard to watch while I was training nearby, but I wasn’t about to get my head bitten off for sticking up for a girl I didn’t know that well.
Zoe is the kind of person to stick to her word, whether it’s a threat or a promise. And if she promises to make my life hell for blocking her, I have no doubt she will find a way to do so.
Khai’s eyes round at the edges, and he blinks slowly. “Oh, shit. I had no idea.” He flicks his hand in the air between us. “Can’t you just unblock her and pretend it never happened?”
I shake my head. “The damage is done. She’s always on her phone and constantly sending texts. It would be a miracle if she didn’t notice the second it happened, but I’m not lucky enough to be blessed with miracles.”
“Fuck,” Khai hisses. “I’m sorry, Sin.”
I slump onto the bench beside him and drop my head in my hands.
It might seem shady that I hadn’t blocked Zoe’s number after I called things off with her, but in my mind, I was doing it to keep her from ruining me and my career.
And now that I’ve blocked her, taking the next step to cut her from my life, she’s going to retaliate in ways I’m sure I’ve never thought possible.
I can only hope Tatum doesn’t get caught in the crossfire of Zoe’s wrath, because if she does, I’ll never forgive myself if she gets hurt.