Page 7 of Unkindness of Crimson Ravens (The Crimson Duet #1)

Gruesome Beasts

T he next few days—perhaps even a week—I was in and out of the oblivion, unable to sit up on the bed, most certainly unable to escape. When I did wake up, I was greeted with the darkness of that eerie room that gave me chills.

The dark green sheets on the bed were cold and sticky from my sweat. My skin prickled with an uncomfortable ache all over my body. My muscles felt weak, as if someone pulled and stretched them for hours without stopping.

Every time I woke I tried to think of an escape plan, but all I was left with was pain all over my body that drowned me into nothingness again and again.

Until one day the pain was finally gone, as though it was no more than a twisted jest of my imagination—a dream even.

For the first time in longer than I could remember everything seemed peaceful.

“Oh, good, you are awake!” An overly enthusiastic voice exclaimed, which caused me to jolt up on the bed. A strange woman stood in the center of the room, smiling excitedly. Was she here to finally kill me? “Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you,” she said, lighting a candle in her hand.

Moving away from her until my back touched the bed frame, I eyed her expectedly. The woman was grinning at me without saying a word. What in the Kingdom did she want from me?

The woman looked to be around twenty years of age, though I could not be certain.

She marveled at me with her warm brown eyes that reflected the candlelight in her hands; the bright smile did not leave her face for even a second.

Her golden dark skin shone even in that lightless room, as if she was sunshine herself.

She moved her black curls away from her face, taking a step towards me.

“How are you feeling? I brought you some blood, it should make you feel better.” She stretched out her hand with a goblet of wine. Blood. Not wine . A shiver went through my body at the realization of what she expected me to do. “I am so excited to have you in our family! Here. Drink it.”

A family? Was she mad? I moved farther away, not wishing to believe all of this was actually happening. It was all a jest, a prank. I had gone mad.

“All right...” the sunshine woman said, stretching out the first syllable.

She placed the glass on the nightstand before sitting down on the bed.

“Gods, it is so dark in this room, no wonder you looked like a scared animal.” She laughed, looking around.

“I told them I should have gone to meet you first, but they never listen.” She mumbled more to herself than to me.

My eyes grew wide. I wished to scream at her to leave me alone for good, but I seemed to have lost my voice.

Perhaps I was like a wild animal: unable to scream, unable to move.

It was a wonder I did not forget how to breathe as well, for my body seemed to completely give up on following any of my commands.

I sat on the bed, watching the stranger's every move, clutching at every word that left her mouth.

She did not seem to care for my reaction; in fact, I was not even sure she remembered I was here.

Her fingers brushed over her sleeves, playing with the golden material.

It did not appear she was here to hurt me, though I did not allow myself to even blink.

I could not trust a soul here and I would never forget that.

After a few moments, the woman’s eyes found mine once again, and the bright smile returned to her face.

“I will bring you more candles, or we could go find something for your room together.” She looked at me expectedly, as though it was my turn to speak, but I merely glared at her.

“Lord, where are my manners?” The woman laughed, shaking her head.

“I am Florence! You are—Cordelia, correct?” Her hand stretched out in an attempt to meet mine.

My eyes tried to catch a glimpse of dishonesty in her features, something to prove her true nature, something to show me the danger I found myself in.

“I understand.” Florence dropped her hand and gave me the kindest smile I’ve seen in my life. “You surely hate me right now,” she laughed again. “That’s okay. I just want to let you know that no one here wishes you harm,” she added quietly.

My breathing deepened as a new wave of panic washed over me, though there was part of me that was relieved by her presence.

I was glad it was her sitting here, and not the man I have seen earlier, or worse—Francis.

Though, I could not help but to feel anger towards her all the same.

Telling me the sweet lies—that I desperately wanted to believe—of me being safe here, and I hated her for it, regardless of how nice she seemed.

I could not trust anyone here: Florence was no different.

Florence played with the sleeves of her yellow dress, while I waited patiently for whatever irritatingly joyful thing she would say next: but she didn't say anything.

After a few very awkward moments of silence, Florence finally took a deep breath, getting up from the bed. “Well, all right then. I shall take my leave now. Let me know if you need anything, my room is at the end of the hallway,” she said smiling, as she started towards the door. “Rest.”

This might be my only chance.

I had to know.

“Wait.” I said, surprising myself at my own bravery.

Florence turned, her smile even brighter than before—if that was even possible. Fear overwhelmed me, but I had to ask; even if I knew the answer already.

“What am I doing here? When can I leave?”

Florence’s lips turned into a thin line. “Francis is trying to help you.” She said, “You need rest.”

“No.” I shook my head, squeezing the blanket in my hands. “I need to go home!” My voice broke on the last word. “My siblings need me—”

“I’m sorry.” Florence whispered. If I didn’t know better, I would have assumed it was pity in her soft voice. “You cannot go back to your human family, Cordelia. They will kill you the moment they figure out what you are.”

As if the ground broke into two, capturing me, trapping me in its depths, depriving me of light and freedom, I was falling. “No. I—”

“I am very sorry, Cordelia.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat, putting all of my remaining strength towards holding back my tears. I would not cry in front of her. I closed my eyes tightly, as if I could disappear from reality by doing so.

The sound of the door creaking shut reached my ears, and I slid back under the covers when quiet tears fell hard from my eyes.

It had been foolish to give myself false hope, but I did all the same. I’d known what had happened to me the moment I’d been bitten. I’d known, yet still had believed, still had hoped for a different outcome.

A fool. I was just a fool.

A princess knows to keep her emotions to herself. A fool! I’d gone to the cemetery at night, at night and all by myself. What had I been thinking? A fool! I’d ran to the woods like a chi—

A fool!

I should've known better. I did know better!

My chest rose and fell, though I could not feel the air inside of me. My throat closed off, as though an invisible rope was tied around my neck; I could not breath. My hands flew towards the rope, trying to free myself, but they were met with nothingness.

I didn’t bother keeping my sobs quiet anymore. I cared not how weak and uncollected I seemed. How very Royal of me. A princess controls her emotions.

My sobs grew louder and louder, echoing through the stone walls.

My hands turned into fists, my nails dug into my skin deeper and deeper with each tear that fell.

The pain in my heart and stomach had nothing to do with my physical condition anymore, this was what heartbreak felt like. I knew it, I remembered it.

I watched my palms go red, blood slowly dripped onto the bed. My breathing labored as the memories of the pain Timothy inflicted on me flashed through my mind.

My jaw clenched at the memory of my mother ignoring my pleas, still forcing me into marrying him.

My eyes saw red at the idea of my dearest sister, Sandra, suffering the same fate and I would not be able to be there to stop it, to save her.

My breathing became rapid when I stared at the barely visible bite through the tears.

I was no longer myself, if myself even ever existed.

Everything I knew was gone, and so was everyone I loved.

I was gone. There was no turning back from it, I knew that.

I’d studied plenty, there was no cure, no salvation, just death.

Brian and Father had lost their lives, protecting us from these horrible creatures, protecting me. They had been brutally killed by one of them, and I’d sworn that day I would not let their sacrifice go to waste. I’d sworn to hate these gruesome beasts. I’d sworn and became one of them.

I had failed them.

I had failed them all.

The tears didn’t stop for a long time, until my consciousness fell into blackness.

I was not sure how long it had been, but every moment drained me more and more. Every time I tried to move, my body screamed in protest. Would this ever stop? Part of me wished to cease existing altogether.

I turned in the bed and somehow the dark room became even darker, or maybe it was my imagination.

The room smelled delightful despite my hatred towards it. The smell was so pleasant, but hurtful at the same time, it prickled my throat as if I had swallowed a dozen needles.

My eyes followed the smell until they spotted the goblet Florence had brought earlier. The realization of the source of this delicious smell washed over me, and my whole body shook in anticipation.

My breathing quickened, every instinct challenged me to dry out its content. Only my will stopped me from doing so. I was not sure I could resist the urge for much longer, my treasonous mind would lose this battle—I knew it.

My lips trembled as I slowly sat up on the bed, not taking my eyes away from the goblet, wishing I could destroy it with my gaze alone. I swallowed the pain in my throat that had only doubled with every passing moment.

My cheeks turned wet as I extended my hand towards the hostile goblet—would the tears ever stop? I peered at the contents of the cup not believing what I was about to do. Did I even have a choice?

Vampires—the word alone made me shudder—could not die of... well, hunger, I believed. At least I'd never heard of such a case, but no matter the haterade towards my new being, my instincts refused to let me find out.

My treasonous hands slowly brought the glass to my lips.

The drink was thick and soft, melting into my tongue like honey.

It didn’t taste like anything in particular, nevertheless it was the most delicious flavor I’d known in my entire life.

Like a person who grew up in a dungeon, seeing the sun for the first time, I devoured the drink.

Suddenly, I was not sure how I could live for twenty four years without it.

The drink warmed up my throat, making it prickle with sweetness, soothing my thirst. My mind spun in euphoria, craving more of this delightful salvation.

Once my mind calmed and clear thoughts returned to me, regret clawed into my chest, crushing my heart into small pieces.

How could I? What have I become? Disgusting. A princess knows self-control . Disgusting. My fingers squeezed the stem of the goblet until they hurt, my knuckles whitened. What was I capable of? How easily did I give in to the temptation? My body shook with rage. Disgusting!

I threw the goblet with all the strength I had. The sound of glass shattering traveled through the room, but the sound was suppressed by my own roar.

“Cordelia?” The voice behind me whispered.

I didn’t bother looking who that was, nor did I stop screaming.

Falling to my knees, the glass pieces on the floor cut through my uncovered skin, I didn’t feel the pain.

This pain could not compete with the pain I felt in my chest. I studied the blood under my nails, imagining my own hands ripping through my skin, freeing my injured heart.

Florence picked up the remnants of the goblet from the floor and sighed. She didn’t say anything, just left me be. Left me alone, staring into the nothingness of this dark room.