Page 6 of Two Nights with the Duke (Cherish and the Duke #3)

“I gnore the stares, Jocelyn,” Malcolm said, wishing he could ease her distress as they sat together in the common room pretending to enjoy their afternoon tea under everyone’s scrutiny.

Jocelyn, it turned out, was surprisingly gentle of heart, despite her reputation. Harpies were supposed to be full of spit and fire, but she merely looked fretful.

Her fretting was due to her worries about his feelings and his being insulted, when she needn’t have been concerned about him at all. His heart had an iron cloak of protection around it. Nothing was going to penetrate that secure barrier.

But her heart was incredibly soft and vulnerable as it lay bare for anyone to hurt.

This was why he was so determined to look after her and keep her safe.

“We are a happily married couple and that is all we need to convey,” he reassured her. “Although dinna ask me exactly how that is done, since I’ve managed to avoid the parson’s mousetrap all these years. I’ll take my cues from ye, lass. Can ye pretend to be happy with me in a wifely way?”

“It isn’t difficult,” she replied. “As I’ve told you, my parents had a good marriage. I learned much from watching them. It is about our feeling at ease with each other, making small gestures of consideration to each other.”

“Such as?”

“Knowing I like a lot of sugar in my tea—which I do, by the way. It is an extravagance, but one my family can afford. So, you ask for a sugar cone and then scrape some into my tea. What sweets are your favorite?”

He shrugged. “I’ll eat pretty much whatever is put before me. Is that not clear from the food I piled on my plate?”

She smiled as she stared at his now-empty dish. “A wife would know if her husband had a hearty appetite. So, being as I am your wife…I might cut my slice of ginger cake in half and offer some to you. Just subtle gestures are all that is necessary.”

“Comfortable companionship,” he muttered.

“Yes, this is what will convince them we are truly married. Not heated looks between us.”

He arched an eyebrow. “Shouldn’t a little heat be necessary for two lovebirds such as ourselves?”

“Hot looks will only convince them we are having a torrid affair. Can you gaze upon me lovingly, as one might look upon one’s favorite aunt?”

“Lass, ye’re too beautiful for that. I dinna think I could pull it off.”

She blushed. “Thank you, Camborne. All right, a little heat, but restrain yourself.”

“And what about you , lass?”

She cast him a look of confusion. “What about me?”

“Ye need to gaze at me worshipfully.”

She laughed and shook her head.

“What?”

“Have I not been doing just that?” She gazed at him with adoring eyes. “You are my knight in shining armor, Camborne. You are every lady’s shining knight. But I have never been referred to as beautiful. Sharp tongued, yes. Cold and dismissive, also yes. Certainly never someone alluring enough to entice a Silver Duke.”

He placed a hand over hers. “There’s something I’d like ye to consider.”

“Oh? What is it?”

“I know I said that I did no’ want to discuss marital arrangements yet, but I’d like ye to give this some thought…” He worried that sitting in the inn’s common room was a poor place to begin this sort of serious discussion, but no one sat close enough to overhear them.

“What is it?” she asked.

Did he dare tell her what was really in his heart?

Did he dare ask her to stay with him forever?

No.

What was he thinking? It was ridiculous to consider anything permanent, for they had known each other less than a day.

“Never mind. It was a foolish supposition. It isn’t important.”

“Obviously, this is something very important to you. Just tell me, Camborne. Is it about your fishing trip? Should I not go with you to your lodge?”

He nodded, allowing her to believe this was his thought when it had not even occurred to him to leave her behind. But now that it had been brought to his attention, how was she going to manage being out in the wild? “Aye, lass. It is a rugged place and will no’ have all the comforts ye are used to having.”

“I see,” she said with obvious disappointment.

“But I dinna mind having ye with me. If ye choose to stay, I can teach ye to fish, and take ye on hikes. There’s no better place to gaze at the stars. Still…”

She leaned toward him. “In truth, it sounds wonderfully romantic. Why are you so perplexed?”

“I am not perplexed.”

“Yes, you are. You are doing that thing again…staring at me with all expression hidden so that I must guess what you are thinking.”

“Are my concerns not obvious? It will be just the two of us at the lodge. No servants. We cook our own meals. Clean up after ourselves. And we’ll be thrown together the entire time. I just want to be honest about what ye’ll face.”

She pursed her pretty lips. “Will I have to clean the fish we catch?”

He let out a breath and chuckled. “No, lass. I’ll take care of that. And washing up the pans, too.”

“While I watch and do nothing?”

“Well, it isn’t as though I was counting on someone to do those chores for me, since I planned to go up there alone. But I would no’ mind having ye with me. In truth, I would no’ mind having ye there at all.”

Her eyes took on a crystal-blue shimmer as they widened. “Truly?”

“Unless ye do not have a liking for the suggestion. I will no’ force ye to join me. It will no’ be easy living, but I think ye might enjoy it.”

“I have never taken care of myself before,” she said softly. “It was probably obvious from all my mistakes when planning my escape from Ballantry. But I would not mind learning how to fend for myself. Are we not agreed on our plan for this month? Well, perhaps we did not finalize it. But since there is no haste to get to Aberdeen once you and I are married, we can head straight to your lodge first, and later take care of my outstanding business. I’ll leave it up to you whether we go to Aberdeen first or last. The point is, I am glad we shall be together for the month.”

“Ye are? That warms my heart, lass.” He raked a hand through his hair, for he was thrilled she wanted to be with him under these hard conditions, but also worried that she would not take it well and then want nothing more to do with him afterward. “Well, the thing of it is…I dinna think ye understand quite what ye are getting into. The lodge is isolated. And it has no comforts.”

“Camborne, if you do not want me with you, then just say so.”

“I do want ye with me,” he insisted. “I just dinna want ye disappointed. However, I can think of no place better if we wish to get to know each other and work out how to move forward. Our impending marriage is a bit of a patched-up affair, hastily concocted and given practically no thought. Certainly nothing either of us was ever prepared for.”

“I certainly wasn’t,” she quietly admitted. “It must be even more shocking for you. But you are taking it awfully well.”

“No, lass. I just hide my feelings better. However, ye make me feel at ease when I’m around ye.”

This was the truth, he realized. When had he ever enjoyed a woman’s company this much? He had spent the entire day with Jocelyn and never once felt bored. This was saying a lot, because he detested shopping and had just spent hours in a ladies’ shop with her. Had it been anyone other than Jocelyn dragging him around, he would have made up an excuse to run out within five minutes of stepping inside.

Just as important, he’d missed her in those few moments they were apart.

“There’s quite a bit we’ll need to work out before we reach your lodge. Will there be enough food for the both of us? Blankets? How are we to wash? I’ll need soap, a proper scented soap with a womanly scent.” Her eyes rounded. “Am I to bathe in an icy stream? I hate being cold. But you adore the cold.”

He cast her a wicked smile. “I’ll warm ye, lass.”

“I’ll bet you will,” she responded with a smirk.

He paused to study her expression as it began to grow serious once more. “Och, what’s wrong now? Ye dinna like the suggestion? Would ye rather return to yer family after we wed? Perhaps we should go straight to Aberdeen, get matters settled with Ballantry and yer family, then I’ll head to the lodge alone, as originally intended.”

“No, it’s just…”

“What is it?”

She frowned.

“Jocelyn?”

She looked at him as though he ought to understand her thoughts.

Blast and botheration , was it starting already? Had he insulted her? Because she suddenly did not look pleased with him at all.

“I know you do not want to discuss this yet, but it is important to me, and shouldn’t you know my feelings?”

“More feelings?” He groaned. “All right, what is it?”

“I do not want to be apart from you, Camborne. I just assumed we would be together once we married. For always . Husband and wife. A team. Bonded in matrimony. No invitation required. By extending an invitation to me, it implies we must part ways once the fishing trip and Aberdeen are over. Is this what you want?”

“No, lass.” He scratched his head. “That is… I dinna know. Must we decide on it now? We hardly know each other.”

“Doesn’t this scare you? We are about to leap into marriage. That is a bond that cannot be broken without agonizing consequences, especially when one is a duke.”

“Nor do I wish it undone,” he said with a growl. “Jocelyn, I will no’ leave ye shamed. I’ve already told ye that I’ll do whatever I must to protect ye.”

“Are we fooling ourselves? Are we both too set in our ways ever to make this work?”

“Never say this. Were ye not the one telling me about compassion. Forgiveness. Understanding. Sacrifice?”

She cast him a wry smile. “That’s true. But I never said I was any good at it.”

He laughed as he gave her cheek a light caress. “Ah, Jocelyn. Ye are very good at it. I’m the one likely to make a bollocks of our marriage. Not intentionally, for I would never want to hurt ye. But the simple fact is, I dinna stand a chance of making this work with anyone but yerself. And another fact is that I dinna want to make it work with anyone but yerself.”

She nodded. “That eases my mind greatly. Well, we shall have the night to mull things over.”

“There’s nothing to mull over about getting married, lass.” He did not intend to sound harsh, but there was no way out for her. She was a runaway bride—and that alone was a difficulty to overcome, but she might have done it in time. However, running into the arms of a Silver Duke, even if that Silver Duke had yet to touch her, had destroyed her standing in Society forever. No family would ever allow her into their home unless the scandal disappeared. In all likelihood, her own family would disown her.

“Lass, if ye think to run away from me as ye did from Ballantry, then think again. I may not be perfect. Indeed, I am far from it. But ye’ll be destroyed unless ye reclaim yer respectability, and the only way to do this is to marry me.”

“I know,” she said. “I am not under any delusions that my family will welcome me back with open arms or that I will be treated any better than a leper by my friends and acquaintances. In truth, most barely tolerated me when I was respectable. Without marriage, I am exactly what Burling insinuated.”

He tucked her chin in the palm of his hand and tipped her gaze upward to meet his. “Never. Ye are a lady. Burling is an arse. Unfortunately, too many people think like he does. But once ye’re married to me, no one can touch ye.”

“I know, and I am grateful for it. I am not going to run away from you. I’m looking forward to spending time alone with you. I hope it will be for longer than the month we spend at your Highlands lodge and Aberdeen.” She eased out of his grasp. “Would you mind if I went upstairs to rest a while? I’ll be fine for supper tonight.”

“We can dine in our bedchamber, if ye’re not feeling well.”

“No, it seems shameful and decadent to do that. Besides, everyone will think we are hiding in shame and start talking about us if we fail to dine down here. I’m fine. Just a little washed out. I’ve developed a bit of a headache.”

“All right, lass. If this is what ye wish.” He tucked a curl behind her ear. “Burling really upset ye, didn’t he?”

She nodded. “I know he is an insignificant gnat and I should not care what he says or does. You’ve come forward like a dazzling knight and defended me. But I cannot believe how stupid I’ve been, and how I’ve dragged you into my mess.”

“Ye have a tendency to latch on to things and fret about them, don’t ye?”

She nodded again. “Sometimes. I know this isn’t a perfect start for us.”

He laughed. “Aye, it could have gone a little better. But I hope we shall make the best of it.”

“Do you think we might ever have a love match? This is what I would like. So, you may as well know my thoughts before you get deeper into this. Is this ever possible?”

He hoped so. Lord, he ached for it.

Was this not the very reason he had felt the need to get away and think? He had become so uncomfortable in his own skin that he could not tolerate it. Coming home after the war had left him aimless and bereft of purpose.

How better to reclaim that sense of purpose than to be needed again?

He escorted her back to their bedchamber, knowing he was disappointing her by leaving the question unanswered. In his own defense, was this not a lot to think about? He decided to return downstairs and have himself a pint of ale. He kissed Jocelyn softly on the mouth before leaving her side, a whisper-soft nothing of a kiss. Even so, fire roared through him the moment his lips touched hers.

It was the oddest feeling.

He’d felt passion before and understood it, but had never felt passion with quite this strength before because it was coupled with a sense of permanence.

Aye, he knew what this feeling was that had overcome him.

He was falling in love with Jocelyn.

And it scared the hell out of him.