Page 16 of Twisted Truths (The Sunburnt Hearts #4)
“Yes,” he says firmly. “You did. I can see it in your eyes.”
I shift uncomfortably. “This isn’t a game for me, Nash. You don’t know what you’re asking for.”
Something dark flashes in his eyes, and I draw a deep breath, fighting my instinct to run. While I don’t think he’s here to hurt me, I know I’m tempting fate by giving in to my desire to talk to him.
Zara always talked about her older brother, and how proud she was of him for breaking free of the heavy shackles of their father and chasing his dreams. She missed him terribly, but she understood why he had to leave.
He was never destined to stay in Barrenridge.
This is why I need to walk away. He can’t help me. No one can.
In my desperation to find my sister, I unknowingly gave up my freedom. To begin with, it was comforting to know I had somewhere to live, with her close by, but over time, I have begun to question what I’ve gotten myself into.
There are dark secrets within the walls of the Sunfire Circle, secrets Zara opened my eyes to, and secrets Gabriel is supposedly trying to save me from. I no longer know who to trust.
“I want you to tell me,” Nash says, interrupting my thoughts as he takes a small step closer, and my breath catches. “Help me understand. Please? For Zara.”
It’s the slight crack in his voice that breaks me. “She’s really gone, isn’t she?” My voice is barely more than a whisper, but he still hears me. Pain washes over his features as he nods, and I hate that my words did that to him. “I’m so sorry.”
Nash makes a soft grunt in acknowledgement. “Now you understand why I need answers.”
“What kind of answers?”
“The kind that will help me find the murderer.”
A shiver runs down my spine at the cold detachment in his voice, and I shake my head. “I don’t know what you want from me.”
“You can tell me what you know about Gabriel. What was his relationship with my sister?”
“She was his Chosen.”
“What does that mean?” he grits out. “What did he do to her?”
It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him about his nephew.
He lost his whole family in a horrific way, and he needs to know he’s not alone.
Fear causes the words to catch in my throat.
If I tell him about Franklin, he’ll storm the commune looking for him, which will only put us all in even more danger.
Right now, Zara’s brother is my only real hope of freedom, and while I know the truth will come out eventually, I need to play my cards close to my chest until I know I can trust him. I made Zara a promise that I would look after Franklin, and I intend to keep it.
“A Chosen is like a bride,” I explain instead.
“She married the son of a bitch?” he snaps, and I flinch at the harshness of his tone. I don’t know what Nash’s problem with Gabriel is, but something tells me it runs deeper than his sister joining the Circle. “Why would she do that?”
Protection.
She didn’t feel safe in her hometown.
I want to tell him everything, but the truth is while I was Zara’s confidante within the walls of this commune, she was wary of opening up too much.
She was cryptic in what she told me, but I know she was scared of someone on the outside.
After Franklin was born, her paranoia got worse.
Zara was convinced whoever it was had infiltrated the Circle.
She warned me not to trust anyone, especially the guardians.
I thought that meant Gabriel as well, but now I think about it …
she spent more time with her guardian once Franklin was born, not less.
Coupled with what I overheard Gabriel say earlier, about Zara seeking refuge with him, and how he’ll do whatever it takes to keep me safe and take ‘them’ down, I’m beginning to think he’s the only person within the Sunfire Circle I can trust.
As I sort through the mess of jumbled thoughts, Nash seems to take my silence as a refusal to answer his questions. He shifts off the rock to pace in front of me, his frustration building by the second.
“So, if Zara was his Chosen ,”—he spits the word out as if it’s something dirty— “then what do they call you? His concubine? His mistress?” I’m frozen, staring at him in complete shock when he halts his movements and turns slowly to look at me.
“How do I know you weren’t in on it? That you and your lover boy didn’t murder her so you could take her place? ”
Tears spring to my eyes at his hurtful accusations. For once in my life, I don’t cower in fear. No, my anger and hurt have superseded my anxiety. I won’t sit here and let this man blame me for the death of someone who was like a sister to me.
Scrambling off the rock, I straighten my shoulders and look him directly in the eye.
“I know you’re hurting, but you don’t get to take it out on me.
” My voice breaks, but now I’ve started, it all comes tumbling out.
“You have no idea what goes on here, and Gabriel means nothing to me. Zara was my closest ally, and we were going to get out together. When she escaped, she left a note saying she’d be back for me, and I waited.
Every day, I waited. I didn’t even know what had happened to her until after the market. ”
His expression shifts slightly, like a crack in a frozen lake, but I don’t stop. I can’t.
“I’m sick of living in fear, Nash—tired of trying to live by these rules which don’t make sense to me, terrified that I’ll make one wrong move, and someone will sell me out to Guardian Solomon or Seraphina.
I came here searching for my sister, but I was too late.
She died during childbirth, and I was left with no one.
No family. Nowhere to go. They took me in, but I’ve always felt like an outsider.
Until Zara. She was a light in the dark.
I don’t know what she was running from, but she was the only person I trusted, and I believed she would come back for me. ”
My throat tightens, but I force the next part out. “She didn’t, though, and now I know why. I didn’t hurt her, Nash, and I don’t think Gabriel did either. Something else is going on here, but I don’t know what.” I hesitate before adding, “Gabriel might, though.”
The silence that follows is brutal. Nash clenches his jaw, his hands fisting at his sides. I don’t know if he’s still angry at me or barely holding it together.
Shaking my head, a lone tear slips down my cheek. “I shouldn’t have told you any of this. You already made up your mind about me.”
Turning, I mean to walk away from him, feeling a chance of freedom slipping away, but I barely make it two steps before his hand closes around my wrist, firm but not forceful.
“Hadley,” he chokes out, his voice rough, threaded with something that sounds like regret. “Don’t go.”
I turn back, ready to yell at him to let me go, but the utter devastation on his face stops me.
“I’m sorry,” he murmurs, his gaze locked on where his thumb is rubbing a soothing pattern on my wrist. “No one else understands. They’re saying Zara did it, that she killed Mum, Paul, and Rylan.”
“No,” I whisper, shaking my head. “She wouldn’t. She could never do that.”
His lips tick up at the corners, but there’s a sadness in his small smile.
“You’re the only one who seems to believe me.
Everyone else keeps saying the evidence—” His voice cracks as he breaks off.
“Even Lev thinks I’m clutching at straws.
I have a feeling he’s starting to believe she did it, and now I have to bury my sister, knowing everyone thinks she murdered them all. ”
I don’t know who Lev is. Zara never mentioned anyone by that name, but I can see the pain in Nash’s eyes, feel the desperation in his words. He’s hurting, and all he wants is someone to believe him. To believe his sister wouldn’t have destroyed his family.
Reaching out a shaky hand, I press it to his cheek, causing him to look up at me. The sadness in his eyes almost breaks me. “Zara didn’t do it.”
For a long moment, we’re caught in an impasse. Nash doesn’t flinch away from my touch. He simply watches me like I’m the last tether holding him together.
Then, he’s kissing me.
I’ve kissed boys before, but none of those teenage kisses have been as all-consuming as this one.
It’s not soft, and it’s not gentle. It’s all heat and desperation, and something unspoken that has been simmering under the surface since the moment we met. His hands are on my waist, and mine grip his shirt. When his tongue sweeps across the seam of my mouth, I open willingly with a soft whimper.
For a moment, the world goes quiet.
No Sunfire Circle. No Gabriel. No fear.
Just us.
And even though I know the dangerous ramifications of this kiss, even though I should pull away—I don’t.
In this moment, I give in to the comfort I feel in Nash’s arms.
I simply give in.