Page 19 of Tracing Her Stolen Identity (Secure Watch #2)

The memories overwhelmed Reece until he fell backward and slid down the wall, his head in his hands and his breathing ragged in the quiet space. He squeezed his eyes shut to try and push the memories away, but it didn’t work.

“My legs! I can’t feel my legs!” Sky cried, terror ripping through him as he knelt on the turf next to her.

“Help is coming,” Reece promised, holding her hand as tears streamed down her face. “Don’t move.”

“I can’t move.” She didn’t scream or cry those three words. Instead, they were barely a whisper, as though the realization had dawned on her that life as they knew it was over.

“Riker!” The sharp tone snapped his head up, and he came face-to-face with Roman. He held his hand out until Reece took it and let Roman help him up. “You look like a man who needs a cup of coffee,” he said.

Roman led him down to the cafeteria where Sadie kept hot, fresh coffee going 24-7. He poured them each a cup before they sat at a table to drink it.

“Thanks,” Reece said, holding up the cup. “It’s been a long few days.”

“Filled with many tense, destructive memories,” Roman added. “I remember how hard it was not to be overwhelmed by the emotions when I saw Mina for the first time after searching for her for a year. To see how much pain they’re in does something to you here,” he said, pounding his chest.

“My problem seems to be here,” Reece said, pointing at his head. “Always has been since the accident.”

“I know what happened to Skylar from helping Mina on the case, but now I understand that the accident affected you far more than a broken wrist.”

“It was my fault,” Reece said, lowering the cup to the table.

“It was the final routine for the event and we thought we had the first-place podium clinched, so we decided to do an easier stunt lift than we’d planned.

There was no point in risking the medal by trying something too hard.

The stunt was flawless until I found myself on the ground and Sky ten feet away, unable to move. ”

Roman sipped his coffee silently while Reece slumped over his coffee mug. “I’m still waiting to hear how it’s your fault.”

“I didn’t catch her!” he exclaimed. “It’s not hard, man.”

Reece noticed Roman blink several times and then opened and closed his mouth twice. “How were you supposed to catch her when you’d been plowed over by a golf cart and had a broken arm?”

“With the other one,” Reece growled.

Roman leaned over the table and folded his hands.

“Listen, Reece. I’ve been where you are multiple times while serving in the army.

I blamed myself for something I had no control over.

Then I worked with Mina for eight years, and on that final day, I let her down.

I wasn’t there when she needed me. She was injured and suffered needlessly for an entire year because of my impotence.

I’ve learned from my brothers here that it’s normal to feel that way, especially when it’s about the woman you love. ”

“Roman, no,” he said with a shake of his head. “It’s not like that. We were childhood best friends, that’s it.”

“Oh, yeah, that’s totally what I see in front of me right now. A man worried about his childhood best friend.”

Reece rolled his eyes. He couldn’t stop it if he tried, because he had no defense when it came to Sky—never had.

“Is Skylar okay?” Roman asked when the silence stretched on.

“She will be, according to Selina. Her catheter was kinked and not draining, causing a dangerous elevation of her blood pressure. That was my fault, too. She had to ride in an awkward position last night after everything that happened. I should have thought of having Selina check her over when we arrived.”

“Was Skylar concerned about it?”

“No. Sky told Selina that it was draining this morning. She just didn’t realize it wasn’t emptying fully.”

“Then I don’t think you can blame yourself for something Skylar controls. All you can do is get her help when she needs it and be there to support her. It seems to me that’s exactly what you’re doing.”

“It’s not enough, man,” Reece said, shaking his head. “I’ll spend the rest of my life knowing I didn’t save her that night. That’s why she pushed me away after high school.”

“Are you sure about that, son?” Cal asked as he walked through the door.

“Hey, Cal. Sorry about the drama. I’ll get back to work here.” Anything to get away from these two men who were mentors, friends and wise beyond their years. He enjoyed nothing more than talking with them, but not when it was about his life.

“I’m not your boss, son. You don’t have to apologize to me. Besides, the last time I checked, you’ve been doing your job 24-7 for the last few days. Take a break and a breath, or you’ll be no good to anyone, especially the woman who needs you the most.”

Roman motioned at him with his hand while nodding. “Exactly what I’ve been trying to tell him.”

“Secure One, Sierra,” they heard over Cal’s walkie-talkie, and he grabbed it, pressing the button. “Secure two, Charlie.”

“Let Reece know that Skylar’s blood pressure is normal again and her headache has resolved. I need to keep her for at least another hour, but she’s out of the woods.”

Cal pushed the button and held it out for Reece to answer. “Thanks, Selina. I appreciate everything you do.”

“Oh, hey, Reece. It’s no problem. Skylar is napping now that everything has been resolved. The exhaustion isn’t helping the situation, so I want to let her rest for as long as possible. Can you work without her?”

Cal handed him the device and, taking possession of the cold plastic box, straightened Reece’s spine a notch. “Yes, and I’d prefer it that way. The less stress she’s under, the better. Do you agree?”

“From a medical standpoint, absolutely. This is stressful, but if she can get some rest, she may be able to cope with it better.”

“Ten-four,” Reece said. “Keep me posted, but I’ll stop in after I check with Mina.”

“She’s in good hands, Reece,” Selina said, her voice dropping slightly. “I know you want to be her hero, and you are, from what she tells me, so just take a deep breath and do what you do best while I do what I do best. Okay?”

“Can do, Selina. Thank you.” Reece handed the walkie back to Cal and stood from the table.

It was time to do what he did best and resolve this situation so he could put Skylar out of his mind again.

Any idea that they could be together ended when he remembered he wasn’t her hero. He was her nightmare.

* * *

W HEN S KYLAR WOKE , she buried her face in the pillow so she didn’t have to face Selina immediately.

All she could see was the look on Land’s face when he’d carried her to the med bay and then the lancing guilt when he’d spotted the catheter.

She moaned and regretted it instantly, as Selina was by her side before it ended.

“You’re awake. How are you feeling?”

“Awful,” she moaned, throwing her arm over her forehead to block the light from her eyes. “How did I let this happen?”

“You didn’t let anything happen,” Selina gently reminded her. “Life just happens sometimes. You’ve been under severe stress and unusual conditions that your body isn’t used to. You have to expect a few hiccups along the way.”

“I’m not talking about that,” she whispered.

“You mean Reece.” Her nod was enough of an answer. “I’ve kept him updated, and he’s been down to check on you a few times. He’s been working with Mina on your case.”

Rather than try to explain further, Skylar just nodded as though that was the end of it. “How is the catheter draining now?”

“Excellent,” Selina answered. “I’m going to change it again before you leave, though. If there was any sediment in your bladder from it being so full, I want to make sure we clear it out and then put in a new catheter. That’s why I’ve been free draining it for the last few hours.”

“Do you think I can go back to intermittent drainage? A bag is going to be extremely inconvenient right now.” Not to mention embarrassing , she thought.

“During the day? No problem. I would still free drain it at night.”

“I always do,” Skylar said. “Well, I always do at home. Lately, sleep has been few and far between.”

“That’s easy to understand. Hopefully now that you’re here, you can rest better at night, which will help your body deal better during the day.”

Selina gathered the supplies needed to change the catheter while Skylar looked around the med bay. “This place is intense for a private medical suite. Are you a doctor or something?”

“Or something,” she said with a smile. “I’m an ex-cop turned search and rescue paramedic turned advanced practice paramedic when I had to start over in life.

Cal hired me as an operative and paramedic, but I found my place here in the med bay.

I do certain ops with the guys when they need a medical person and an extra agent, but after much self-reflection, I realized that my favorite thing to do is help people.

That’s when I decided to play to my strengths. ”

“It sounds like you’ve lived an interesting life,” Skylar said with a smile. “I’m lucky you decided to play to your strengths, or I’d be dead.”

Selina smiled as she snapped on gloves and started changing the catheter. “I’m lucky to do what I love with the person I love.”

“Oh, your significant other works here, too?”

“Yep. My husband, Efren. He was a sharpshooter for the army and then worked as a bodyguard, which is how he came to work here for Secure One. Now, he’s an operative on the security team. He’s an above-knee amputee.”

“Oh,” Skylar said, not making eye contact.

After all the years of dealing with medical professionals, she was used to letting others take control of her body.

She didn’t like it, but she’d learned that it wasn’t always worth fighting for independence regarding her health.

Sure, she could change the catheter herself, but it was more difficult for her to do it.

Allowing Selina to do the task meant the catheter wouldn’t give her any more problems, which was crucial in her current situation.

“All done,” Selina said, attaching the new catheter to the drain bag. “I’ll let it drain until you’re ready to go and then I’ll cap it off and you can take control of it again. Reece brought your chair down and said he’d help you transfer when you were ready.”

The sigh escaped before she could stop it, so she looked away from the woman who had been nothing but kind to her. “Maybe I’ll just stay here forever.”

Selina’s laughter was soft as she walked back to the stretcher. “That never seems to be a good way to deal with our problems.”

But Reece was a problem Skylar didn’t know how to deal with.

“Maybe not.” She wanted to say more, but she couldn’t promise that if she did, she would be able to hold back the tears.

Selina took her hand and held it, offering a smile of understanding.

“You’re overwhelmed, tired, scared and angry.

That’s all understandable. When you toss in medical situations like you deal with, it’s easier to pretend none of it is happening than face it head-on.

There isn’t a person in this building who doesn’t understand that.

You’re among friends here. We want to help. ”

“I’ve never been more grateful,” Skylar said, a shaky smile tipping her lips.

“But that’s also part of the problem, right?” Selina asked, and Skylar tipped her head in confusion. “Reece.”

“Oh.” That was all she said, because saying anything more would have ended in tears. Once she started crying, she wasn’t sure she could stop.

“He’s really worried about you. Roman and Cal had to talk him down off the ledge after he left you here.”

“He’s always been my defender,” she agreed, still not making eye contact. “He feels guilty for what happened to me, even though it wasn’t his fault.”

“There isn’t a person in this building who doesn’t understand that, too. We also understand pushing people away because we think it’s in their best interest.”

“It is,” she assured the woman. “Now he knows it, too. If there’s one thing this episode did, it taught him what my life is like and why he doesn’t want to be part of it.”

“But what if he does?”

Skylar shook her head wildly. “He doesn’t. Not after what he saw today. The accident hasn’t been kind.”

“You’re upset that he saw your stoma?”

“I’m upset that he saw it all,” she whispered. “My para-belly, the stoma, my body’s reaction to the situation.” She shook her head against the pillow. “It doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter.”

“It feels kind of like it matters, Skylar. You’re a woman. Understandably, you don’t want your crush to see you like this.”

“He’s not my crush.” The words were vehement even if they weren’t true. “I didn’t want him to see it because he’d just feel worse about the accident. It’s bad enough I had to call him and ask for help. I knew he’d do it out of guilt, but I had nowhere else to turn.”

“He’s not helping you out of guilt, Skylar. He’s helping you because he cares about you, whether you like it or not. Honestly, that’s his right. You’re a beautiful woman, para-belly, stoma and all. You can’t blame him for being attracted to you.”

“He’s not. We’re old friends in a strange situation.”

“Okay, well, let’s just say your para-belly and stoma are the least important part of who you are and Reece knows that.

I’m not a therapist or a psychiatrist, but I do recommend that you talk to him about what happened.

Be honest with him about how you’re feeling so he can be honest about the same. ”

Selina patted her hand and then released it to take her blood pressure again.

Skylar closed her eyes, but all she could see was the look of concern on his face.

That was when she realized he had never taken his eyes off hers.

Maybe he hadn’t seen as much as she thought or didn’t register it if he had.

Did it matter? No. He should see it all.

Let him see her sagging belly and the tube doing what she no longer could.

Maybe it was the reality check he needed after that kiss this morning.

She would cherish it forever as the one and only kiss she’d get from the only man she would ever love.

That didn’t mean she wanted him to stay with her.

It meant that she loved him enough to let him go.