Page 32 of Too Sweet

“Are you okay?” he probes.

I let the question wash over me. There’s not a right answer. If I wasn’t okay, he would honor that, and our Sunday morning would look very different.

But that’s the beauty of truly being seen and being loved so well.

Yesterday I started to spiral.

But I was able to stop, regroup, and open up about what was bothering me instead of letting it fester or grow into a monster I was scared to confront.

It’s okay to not be okay. That doesn’t make me a burden or difficult to love. It’s part of being human. It’s part of surviving something awful and then refusing to let it corrupt the best parts of life.

I give him a confident nod. “Yes. I’m okay.”

He watches me, his bright blue eyes barely visible through the lenses of his glasses. After a few beats, he nods once, accepting my answer.

I roll my lips together as he stares at me.

“What is it, baby?”

Warmth radiates through my chest. Kyl can always tell when there’s something on my mind.

“You didn’t get me anything,” I state. I’m not upset by the lack of gifts—on the contrary, I love that he read between the lines and correctly assessed the context of the situation.

He hooks his hands under the meaty part of my ass and shifts me higher up his body. I pop up on my elbows, wanting to see as much of him as I can despite the darkness.

“I assumed you would react poorly to the receiving of unrequested, unexpected gifts.”

That tracks. Kylian explained at Christmas how stressful it felt to not know what he was receiving as a kid. He asked each of us for a specific gift and even sent the order link to ensure we purchased the right version of what he requested. None of the guys balked, and once he explained how uncomfortable he was with the uncertainty of surprise gift-giving, I quickly came to terms with it, too.

His inclination to avoid surprising me makes sense.

I bite down on my bottom lip, silently debating whether I want to ask the other question that’s been nagging at me since yesterday. I clear my throat and find my courage. “You didn’t think to warn the others?”

Kylian sighs. “I tried. In retrospect, I should have tried much harder. I realize that now,” he confesses. “I did not have the bandwidth to talk Decker and Kendrick out of their grandiose ideas. I just wanted to get away from the mansion and enjoy this weekend together. I’ve been overextending myself, trying to help Spence and keep up with the security detail for Hunter. I thought I was coping well, but there are a lot of people at the house right now, and obviously, I’m slipping.”

“Kylian. No. I didn’t mean—”

“I recognize the role I should have played in this situation, Jo. I’m not accepting all the blame or berating myself, but I know I could have done better. Could have, should have, and decidedly will moving forward.”

We’re both quiet as I let his words soothe me. I’m glad I asked, because now I have a better idea of everything he’s dealing with, too. Eventually, I lift my head and peak up at him once more.

“So… besides the sprinkles, which I really did love, by the way…” He smiles, and my insides tingle. “There aren’t any more surprises?”

We’re leaving around lunchtime. I would be shocked if there was anything else, but my anxiety still needs to know for sure.

“I’m making pancakes for breakfast after I eat you out for several hours. That’s the last surprise I planned for this weekend.”

Contentment washes over me.

“I can live with pancakes.”

Kylian snickers.

“No comment on the other part of the morning that’s about to commence?”

I rest my chin on his chest, willing him to feel my sincerity. “No comment, but only because my feelings are a given. Sunday mornings are my favorite part of every week.”

With a salacious grin, he says, “Don’t get ahead of yourself, baby. You haven’t tried these pancakes yet.”