Page 5 of Tino

Chapter 4

Tino

My heart was breaking all over again.

How was that even possible? How could something so utterly broken continue to break? It didn’t make any sense. But it was. The last letter from Tair was in my hands and I’d just finished reading it. Him saying his final goodbye to me.

To my Tino

I have no idea if you’ll ever read this letter. Like my many others, I no longer believe you’re even getting them. It makes it easier to believe that, than thinking you’re ignoring me on purpose. But thatisn’t the Tino I know. The Tino I fell in love with and will continue to love forever is kind. His heart is full of love to give. And he would NEVER ever ignore me. So why am I even writing this? Even knowing you’re not getting them? Because I needed this.

Tomorrow, I’m being shunned. I’m so scared, Tino. This means I will never see you again. For real. I will never know if you’ve found happiness. If you got your powers. If you miss me.

Do you still think about me? About the future we’d planned? A house full of animals? Our shared room with one big bed we never had to leave?

I do.

I don’t think about anything else. Maybe because now for the first time ever, I know that future will never happen. I’m leaving the Realm of Mages forever. I’m leaving you forever. Wherever you are.

If you do get this letter, know that I’ll always love you.

I was too scared to admit just how much I loved you then, but I have nothing left to lose. I already lost everything anyway.

I am so deeply in love with you, Tino.

And I’ll always only be yours.

Ihope you find happiness, even if it isn’t with me.

Just promise me one thing.

Name one of your many future pets Tair. Let me have that one thing.

Love always

your Tair.

Tears were trailing down my chin as I sobbed, holding the letter in one hand as I hugged my knees, falling apart on the inside. I didn’t care if I made a noise, no one was out here anyway. I’d been walking for two days and finally found shelter. This area had been abandoned many years ago from the looks of it. I was starving and cold, but I couldn’t really feel it. Not while my heart was aching. Not while picturing my Tair being just as broken as me. His light had dimmed. I could tell from each letter how the light inside of him had fizzled out. How with each month that had passed, he’d lost more of himself. All because of me. Because of the leaders.

I knew now why Dad had gotten the promotion, why we had to leave. They didn’t want magicless mages around one another, maybe because they thought it would keep our magic away if we did? But itwas the only reason I could come up with. Why else would they care so much as to threaten my parents? Why else keep us apart? Too bad it hadn’t worked. Neither Altair nor I had gotten our magic. Their meddling had only caused us to break instead. Would they have let us get shunned together if we’d never been parted? I doubted it. The leaders were some nasty people. They’d never care enough about us to grant us even that.

Too busy filling the wooden cabin with my loud sobs, I failed to hear the running footsteps, until it was too late. The door flung open, smacking into the wall beside it, making me flinch back in fear.

One word was spoken. One word to unravel me further.

“Tino.”

My head flew up and then even though it couldn’t be possible, there in the open doorway stood an older version of my Tair.

“I’m dead,” I whispered, knowing that had to be the only reason I was seeing him. “I’m so dead,” I repeated, looking down at myself, then quickly back at Altair, not wanting to look away from him. I had to be in heaven with him somehow. Or maybe I was dreaming? It was a cruel dream, but I never wanted to face reality after this.

“Tino,” he sobbed, rushing over to where I was sitting on the floor. He barreled into me, carrying a scent I never thought I would smell ever again.

“You smell like you,” I murmured, holding him closer against me. He was crying against my shoulder, and I let him, dream or death, I didn’t care. As long as my Tair was in my arms, I was happy.

Fuck… I was happy. A choked laugh escaped me and I couldn’t help but say it. “I thought I wouldn’t be able to feel happiness again.”

“That’s beautiful,” a stranger’s voice reached me and I looked up to find the cabin had been filled with four other men and one woman, all looking teary eyed at us. Maybe you didn’t get much privacy in heaven. The one who had spoken was crying and so was the woman.