Page 5

Chapter five

The Ball

M y pace was frantic by the time I made it back to the castle. The main road led uphill, and time undoubtedly slowed as I pushed myself up the endless ascent despite my burning thighs. The luz tower was a north star for direction but taunted me as it hardly seemed to get closer. Thank the sun and stars that Leon had taken the herbs, or they would have wilted the way I was in the beating sun. Now, I just needed to find him.

I raced to the prince’s rooms first, in case he had expected me to grab them, only to be turned away by a sneering guard who informed me that the prince was already at the ball for last-minute preparations. I then swept through my room, finding it also without a basket. Reluctantly, I dragged myself down the hall toward my father’s workspace to see if it had been left there. I braced for his displeasure. I now knew where the herbs grew, so I could go again—maybe tomorrow, if needed—but if Leon had forgotten them or lost them…no, he wouldn’t let me down. He couldn’t have…

Stepping slowly toward the corridor, I heard the clear, sober voice of my father. He sounded pleased. I rushed around the corner.

“And you found these on your hunt?” he asked .

“Yes, Lord Remsha. We were chasing this glorious buck,” Leon answered. My brows furrowed.

“How fortuitous, you saw them and gathered them,” Father replied. “The seven stars were shining on you today.” The prince lifted a finger as if to speak again, I hoped to clarify. By now, I stood in the hall, stunned by the prince’s words. My father waved me toward them. As I approached, I saw my father’s pleased face crumple into one of embarrassment as he took in my filthy state. He searched about us as if looking for some closet to shove me into, but the prince chose that moment to turn.

Father laughed awkwardly. “Your Highness, you must forgive her appearance. She’s either been tossed in a dust storm or had less luck and more work searching for these herbs than you did!”

The prince smiled and shrugged an apologetic shoulder at me.

My breaths were coming too fast, and I fought back my indignation at Leon not correcting my father. “But of course, Father, I was searching. I—” I glanced at the prince, who raised a brow. “I-I’m so glad the herbs for our great queen were recovered today.” My tone sharpened. “The prince leads the nation with light and hope.”

Prince Leon’s smile looked a bit sheepish. “Indeed. Well, the ball awaits. I hope to see the fair lady there?”

Father patted the prince’s shoulder—too intimately for his rank—as they both turned down the hall. “She’ll be there. I have a surprise for her, and therefore, for you. We’ll turn her around in no time.” The prince’s gaze was fixed on my father’s hand, which now rested on his forearm. Father retracted it and rubbed his hands together awkwardly. The prince clicked his heels with a terse nod to Father and then me, before he headed toward the ballroom.

My father’s smile lingered until the prince was out of earshot before turning to me. “What am I to do with you, child? You look…poor. We ca nnot have that. And what is on your boot? Why is there a leaf in your hair? It couldn’t be a racerbristle, but it’s similar. Did you roll around in the forest? Come. Come with me.” Tucking my hand into his elbow, my father escorted me through the servants’ passages to my room, avoiding the common, bustling hallways and judgmental looks of the nobles.

He shut the door and grasped my shoulders, brushing my cheek with his thumb. “I was the worst of fathers, the worst of men to you last night. I’m so ashamed. Could you ever in that big heart of yours imagine a way to forgive me?”

“But of—”

“No, no. Don’t answer yet. Just look!” With a flourish, he threw open my wardrobe. A silver ballgown hung to the floor, white gloves were draped over the hanger, and sparkling white shoes sat beside the dress. “Look, my honeystar, it even matches your hair! The seers said I could find something on the market street, and it was such a good deal at the store. It was the last of its kind in stock, but I knew my daughter had to have it. Can you forgive me now, my sweet girl?”

I squeezed his hand, my smile fixed like flint as I took it all in. It did match my hair. So well. Too well. I would look like a wraith, a ghost, better suited for hanging from the ceiling as the chandelier than mixing among the nobility. But his face was so earnest. He had even apologized. He loved me.

“Of course, Father. It’s okay. Thank you for this dress.”

My father grinned at me, obviously pleased with himself. “Now hurry, girl. The ball starts soon, and you cannot be late!” He gave one last grimace at my appearance before sweeping out of the room.

I turned back to the dress from last season, tugging softly at the square neckline, wondering if Father even realized the style was now a broad scoop. But it was too late to fix. The dress I had planned to wear was nowhere to be found, and I was out of time. It was nearly too late to bathe.

I felt happy he got it for me. I was certain I could feel happy.

The bath wasn’t able to restore my aching muscles, but it served its purpose to clean me up. I tried to create a swooping hairstyle to cover the dark swirl on my neck that still had an upward-rising twist. Fashionable enough, and no one would see it. The hairstyle was also not in fashion. Nothing about me would be, but at least no one else could see my new beauty mark.

The dress was exactly as bad as I’d expected. The only mercy was that my pink-hued, sunburned cheeks added some color to my wraithlike appearance. Even my blue eyes seemed bleached out in all the shades of silver and white. I reached for my mother’s necklace and placed it just below the notch of my sternum. Maybe I could draw attention to that, and no one would notice the dress. As white as I was, perhaps I could blend in with the curtains…or the tablecloths. An image of myself lying across the royal tables as the nobles set their wine glasses and plates upon me made me laugh. I would be the lumpiest of tables.

A knock at the door pulled me back to the present. Double-checking that my hair covered the mark, I glided to my father in my new, pinching shoes. His darker olive skin tones, earth-brown eyes, and black hair with just a hint of gray were all suited for silver, and his matching suit appeared much more flattering on him than my attire was on me.

“What a vision,” he breathed. “You are ethereal. I shall have to buy you more dresses just like this!” He pulled me toward him in a tight hug. “Come, my dear. Let me continue to make it up to you at the bonding ball.”

I tried to smile. “Thank you, Father, it is a generous gift. ”

His eyes drifted to the necklace, and his cheek jerked. Instinctively, he rubbed at the scar on his hand. His Adam’s apple bobbed.

I watched him rub his thumb over the rolling skin. “Was it worth it, Father? The bond?” He glanced down and, noticing his habit, shoved his hands into his pockets. “You paid such a cost.”

“Your mother was everything good and light.” He cleared his throat, the dark shadows of memories vanishing from his eyes. “But now we must focus on someone else’s happiness. Not just on our own sorrows. Enough with insipid questions.”

He turned and offered me his elbow, leading us out to the main hall and up the grand staircase. The walls contained more luz lamps than usual and beamed with light, making the room seem brighter than daylight. A steady stream of visitors crossed the ornate marble floor toward the ballroom, all dressed in their finest. I noted that several of the more popular, and therefore more powerful, young ladies were adorned with feathers in their hair—another new trend. I’d need to collect some the next time I was out.

At the ballroom, the caller announced us, and Father walked in with a proud tilt to his shoulders. The men bowed to each other, and the women curtsied, but behind fluttering fans, smiles soured to snickers as their eyes flicked over me. Several seers meandered, blessing the guests with a greeting as they passed like specters.

“My dear, go mingle. I need to catch up with Lord Brynett.” Father motioned toward the group of young men and women at the front of the ballroom near the archway where the Mastersons would be bound and wed.

The noblemen and women milled around each other like wasps flitting around carrion before the massive windows that displayed the glorious sunset. The Mastersons were the center of it all, laughing and beaming at each other in a true demonstration of infatuated obsession. It was the fifth bonding ceremony of the season. These balls, added between the usual holidays, were a social dance I knew well. I would eat and smile, and occasionally, some foreign lord would ask me to dance before he was taught better by the others. We would watch the happy couple be sprayed with river water dripping from razewa branches as they decided to be trapped together forever. Then, I would leave and pretend my loneliness was a welcome state. So, as usual, when my father turned, distracted, I headed to the back wall by the banquet table.

The elderly ladies gathered there were too polite to be rude to my face; some were even quite cordial. Lady Brynett dipped her head, and I returned a shallow curtsy. The lady was one of the queen’s main attendants, and I often saw her tending to the queen when I came with the potions. King Harold turned around the corner beside us and caught her up in conversation, so after I greeted him, I twisted away and sipped on a glass of something too sweet.

A door along the wall opened behind me, and Chef struggled to get through while carrying a large tray. I moved to help, but her glare froze me in place. Heaving it onto the table, she finished arranging the desserts. She murmured, “Are you an apparition? Or here to match the calla lilies?”

I took a fake drink, my lips hidden by the glass as I replied, “A gift from my father.”

Chef looked me up and down again before moving a breadbasket to the left. “He’s better with herbs than with fashion.”

A genuine smile split my face but lost some of its brightness as I responded. “He felt he needed to apologize. He…tries.”

Chef snorted with very little grace. “Seems to me that he could not do things that hurt you in the first place.” I glanced at her, shocked, but she had already turned toward the kitchen .

The Mastersons were near, edging closer to the king. How did I end up so close to the main throng of people?

“He bumped my arm at the market,” Lady Marva said. “That’s when the first mark appeared.”

Lord Masterson’s eyes were honeyed and fixed sweetly upon her face. “Even before the mark, I knew that you were the most perfect woman in the whole realm for me.” The courtiers twittered and fanned their faces as they whispered back and forth.

“I knew you were handsome, but you convinced me with your bravery fighting against those horrible spyrings from the mining tunnels. The Shade has no shame using such evil to attack us.”

I glanced up at this, having not heard about the attack from the giant spider-like monsters of the deep. Luz was mined from the mountain the castle sat upon, and occasional monsters were gossiped about by the workers. But I’d never heard of an attack on the surface.

“There, there, Lady Marva,” King Harold set his hand upon Lord Masterson’s shoulder. “Let’s not dwell on unpleasant things during the moment we’ve gathered to celebrate your bonding.”

She curtsied. “Of course, Your M—Highness. The prince and king lead the nation with light and hope.” The gathering around us murmured the words back in response. King Harold smiled as brightly as the sconces behind him, and he nodded magnanimously, preening under all the adoration of his people.

I’d been slinking away from the gathering of people when a male voice said loudly, “My lady, watch out! A dog!”

My body lurched at the memory of the odor and warmth. Unwilling to be peed on yet again, I leaped to the side with a yelp and swirled to search the floor around me. But there was no dog. This was a ball—of course, there was no dog. Heat billowed up my cheeks and sweat gathered at the base of my neck. Three of the lords from this morning’s hunt now stood between me and the king’s posse, cross-armed, with halfcocked smirks that belied no friendly tones. Leon had been approaching his father’s side and turned with a frown but made no move to correct or deflect their behavior.

I curtsied a goodbye to the lords before I bumped into Lady Nora, an unbonded betrothed of one of the lords behind me. “Leaving so soon?” she asked.

“I heard her father couldn’t afford anything else. I saw it too—the late Lady Ernst’s dress.” A woman whispered loudly while leaning in toward Lady Nora. “Yellow from a dog might actually do that sallow dress a great service.”

I stumbled back a pace and moved away, placing myself more in the center of the room. “My lady, could I have this dance?” A man I barely recognized approached me. Relief flooded through me, and I smiled. Anything to get away from—

His gaze fell to the hem of my dress. “On second thought, can you smell that?” His eyes gleamed with cruelty. “I’ll pass.” My jaw fell slack.

The group had gathered and muttered just loudly enough for me to hear it.

“I saw her in the kitchen.”

“Did you see that filth on her neck at the dinner table? Did she roll with the pigs?”

“He said she was digging in the dirt. I bet there is some still under her nails.”

“How can she be noble? I mean, really? ”

Words like arrows assaulted me from every corner. The snickers increased from every side. Their eyes on me, fingers pointed, noble fangs bared. Their fans lashed sharply, beautifully hiding sharper words. Leon looked torn, but his father set a hard hand on his shoulder. The prince stiffened, his face resetting to flint like his father’s. At their unwelcome expressions, my spine straightened. The king glanced toward the doorway, his message clear. It was time for me to go and spare him any further embarrassment.

Racing toward the escape, I iced over my heart, holding back the tears and refusing to worsen what was already a terrible moment. It had been better when I was ignored. It had been better when no one had noticed me at all. Why today did they say aloud what they had once only murmured in private? It was likely a long time coming, but none of the lords had ever seen me in this state before. I had brought shame to the king and to Leon. I had also shamed my father, who made no move away from his companions to follow me out of the ballroom.

No footman moved to open the doors for me as I approached. Nearly falling upon the handles, a smoky whisp slipped through the crack, but I paid it no mind. Wrenching open both doors, a wall of thick black smoke billowed in, curling and racing through the threshold. A figure stepped forward through the haze, and I found myself face-to-face with Death himself.

Behind him, the boiling cloud of shadow filled the hallway. It reached forward, wrapping around the base of my dress, then creeping into the ballroom like a cauldron full of spiders had been poured out. It moved with intelligence, sliding, grasping, and climbing as it transformed my escape route into a blackened pit. The nobles in the room drew back from the shadow’s touch, but I was already surrounded. It clung to my gown, and its cool touch slipped past my ankles like grasses at the bottom of a lake. From within the cloud, a man emerged. He was clothed in black, with a long black jacket, black gloves, and a silken black cravat. The details were lost behind the obscuring smoke, but the Shade’s bright green eyes were fixed on me.

I was trapped. Ensorcelled. Paralyzed. The weight of his presence filled my mind and surged through my body until I was frozen like stone. My skin prickled. Hot. Electric. Ice that burned. But I didn’t feel the sting of shame as I had moments before, but fear. Mortal terror gripped me. A wayward tear trickled down my cheek. As his gaze followed the tear’s slow progress, whatever power he had over me lessened a fraction, and I could breathe again. His eyes flicked back up to mine, and his brow furrowed.

The sounds of panic and backpedaling behind me suddenly halted. The entire room held its breath, terrified but morbidly curious to see what he would do with me.

So I did what any lady would do in a moment of panic when faced with terrifying courtly egos.

I curtsied.