Page 23

Anya

The first time Leo cried, I was so sound asleep that it took a moment to get my bearings.

Baby.

Parker’s room.

Parker’s bed.

I rubbed my eyes as I turned over and tried to clear the sleep from my head, and in that pause, the lamp by Parker’s side of the bed clicked on. Even though it wasn’t bright, I still winced at the sudden change in the room.

Instead of heading to the bottles, to my utter astonishment, the man walked around the foot of the bed, reached into the bassinet, and picked up his son without so much as a meaningful glance or a I’ve got this or Oh hey, don’t worry, I’m okay touching my kid now .

Just … picked him up. Cuddled him against his bare chest like it was totally normal. Leo’s brown hair was a little lighter than Parker’s, but what a sight they were—with the cut lines of his abs and the rippling muscles in his forearms as he slowly unhooked the velcro of the swaddler.

Good Lord, my eggs were practically screaming to be fertilized.

My mouth hung open just a little, but I snapped it shut before he gave me a quick, nervous glance. It was the naked vulnerability in his eyes that had my entire nervous system melting like a freaking ice cream cone, the panting beast in my ovaries cooling just a little bit.

“Can you make the bottle, please?”

I blinked. Blinked again. “Of course,” I said haltingly.

My movements were clumsy getting out of the bed, and when he brought Leo closer to his face, pressing a kiss to the top of his head, I almost tripped over my own fucking feet.

“You all right?” he asked smoothly, eyes cutting over to mine while I peeled the top off the can of formula and tried not to drop it.

“Totally. Totally, completely fine and not at all shocked by these turn of events.”

Parker’s lips twitched, and he laid Leo on the bed, opening up his swaddler. His smile at Leo’s reaction should be illegal—white teeth and a dimple, for fuck’s sake. “I think he hates this thing. Look at how he stretches his arms.”

“Yes, I can tell he hates it by the”—I glanced at the clock as I mixed the powder into the water—“five hours he just slept.”

“I think you’re being sarcastic.” Parker took the bottle from my outstretched hand, scooping the baby back up into his arms. “There you go, dude.”

“I need to pee before I can process this,” I told him, head still spinning.

“Ahh, we’ve reached this point of marriage, huh? The mystery is gone.”

He didn’t see my eye roll, but based on the low chuckle, he must have sensed it. By the time I got back into the room, he’d perched on the foot of the bed. While Leo pulled hungrily at the bottle, I set the wipes and a clean diaper onto the mattress next to Parker, making sure to keep a safe distance between me and the walking single dad fantasy playing out next to me.

“Am I allowed to ask?”

“Of course you are,” he answered, eyes firmly fixed on the baby. His cheek dimpled when he smiled. “I might not answer, but you’re allowed to ask.”

I swatted his leg—all rock-hard muscle—and he did nothing but chuckle under his breath. It made me a little breathless, all this playful energy in the middle of the freaking night. Somehow, he was easier to resist when those broken pieces were on full display.

“You were right,” he said after a long moment. He used the edge of his fingertip to smooth the lines on Leo’s forehead, then dragged it down the bridge of his nose. “About everything, really. I needed someone to say that to me.” His eyes showed a heartbreaking sincerity when they moved from the baby to me. “Thank you.”

“I’ll accept payment in large bills, please,” I answered, my airy tone betraying the unsteady throttling of my heart behind my ribs. Again, Parker laughed—a rich, deep sound that made my stomach flip. What a perplexing situation we’d found ourselves in.

Shifting back under the covers, I watched him set the bottle down and carefully move Leo to his shoulder, the flex of the muscles in his back snagging my attention as he patted a healthy burp from the baby. I clenched my jaw and quietly talked him through the diaper change, only laughing once when he couldn’t figure out the tabs right away.

By the time he had Leo settled back into the bassinet, I was a freaking wreck. My hormones couldn’t settle the fuck down, and all I wanted to do was climb into his lap and kiss him and smell his skin and run my hands over all those flexing muscles on display.

It wasn’t even about sex, though that first time felt like it had happened a million years ago, and my sleep-deprived mind wouldn’t hate a reminder. It was the intimacy of what was happening in this place, so far removed from our real life. It was witnessing firsthand someone willing to push through their fears. It was all these blurred lines, crisscrossing around each other, demolishing boundaries that had felt firm a week ago.

An emotionally stunted husband who never wanted to fall in love.

A wife with a bruised heart and trust issues.

And now we were … what? A hodge-podge little family with no clear exit strategy.

Parker excused himself from the room to use the bathroom, and I curled onto my side, pressing my face into the pillow that somehow smelled like him. When he returned, he gave me a glance before turning off the lamp.

Moonlight filtered in through the blinds, and the light sliced across his chest and stomach, highlighting the grooves of his abs in a way that had me breathing unsteadily. Without a word, Parker climbed under the covers and settled himself on his back, hands anchored lightly on his chest while he stared at the ceiling.

“Did I do okay?” he whispered.

I was trembling from the force of holding myself still, and I would have succeeded, but he turned his face to the side, pinning me with a look so devastatingly open, so exposed, that my flimsy walls didn’t stand a chance.

My gut screamed to stay away, that I should keep myself safe.

My brain had stalled, emotion briefly overriding my logic.

It was my heart that pushed them both aside and urged me forward.

I pushed up on my elbow, leaning closer to brush a soft kiss over his lips. We hovered there for a moment, and when I didn’t retreat, his palm coasted over my arm until his hand anchored at the back of my neck, yanking a shiver along my spine. His tongue teased the seam of my mouth, and I opened, touching his with my own.

It wasn’t fierce or rushed. There was no urgency here, which somehow made it even scarier. This kiss was a taste, a sample of something that I was quite sure neither of us were ready for.

Not only was I not ready, he didn’t want to be. Which was why I pulled back, resting my forehead against his. I skimmed my thumb along his jaw and whispered, “You were perfect.”

Parker’s hand at my neck tightened, his breathing fast and choppy, and for a moment, I thought I’d doomed us. But his hand relaxed, and he moved back far enough to peer into my face, a dangerous grin curving his lips.

“Is this one of those moments when I get a sexy prize just for doing the bare minimum?” He licked at his bottom lip. “Weaponized male incompetence, right? Isn’t that what they call it?”

A shocked laugh burst from my lips, and his smile widened when I slapped a hand over my mouth. He made a tsking sound. “Don’t wake the baby. I just worked so hard to get him down. You have no idea.”

I pinched his nipple and twisted, and he let out a hissing sound, snatching my hand as he laughed. Parker nipped at my fingers, and with heated cheeks, I tugged my hand back to my side of the bed.

“How do you know what that is?” I asked.

He quirked an eyebrow. “You met my sisters, right? I knew what that was when I was in high school.”

I shook my head, shifting back to the relative safety of my side of the bed. “You’re such an ass sometimes.”

Parker closed his eyes. “I know. That’s part of my charm, golden girl.”

With the buzz of his cell phone on the nightstand, I was saved the hassle of a response. It was probably best since the first thing that came to my head was another kiss with more tongue and less clothes.

After a glance at the phone, Parker sat up, his face lit by the blue glow of his screen. His brow doing that cute wrinkly thing, and I pushed up on my elbow again.

“What is it?”

He exhaled slowly, then handed me the phone.

Milicent: Congratulations, looks like you have yourself a son.