Page 22 of The Wrong Idea (The Kinky Bank Robbers #2)

Chapter Fifteen

My bandits’ hideout was a glass and stone building nestled into a hill behind a thick cover of trees, and if you looked hard, you could catch sight of the ocean beyond.

The interior was full of colorful furniture, modern art, and books. Fanciful lanterns hung from the ceiling, and a strip of flame burned behind blue glass.

I’d never seen such a fireplace, such a home. It was comfortable, and more whimsical than I’d imagined, too. Odin had picked out the stuff, of course.

Zeus showed me my room. It was simple and elegant with a view of the sun-splashed ocean through the trees. “You go ahead and make it yours however you want,” he said. “That was a rich haul. You’ll see when we split it.”

“It’ll definitely need a Paris Hilton sheep’s wool comforter,” I said.

“We’ll all get one.”

I settled in and put a few things away. I was excited to be able to put my clothes in a dresser and know they’d be there for more than forty-eight hours. I’d never even had a room of my own. Back at the farm with my sisters, I shared a room with Vanessa.

After I’d settled in, I headed back out to the main room to find Thor going around flinging open windows. Zeus was downstairs getting in a quick workout.

I grabbed a snack and settled in with a book.

Home.

There was a hot tub, of course, and the remnants of a garden Thor had planted the year before. It seemed that they came here on and off when things felt safe.

We grilled a late dinner and slept like logs, or at least Thor, Zeus, and I did. You never knew about Odin. He had such sleeping issues, sometimes even thrashing around. Maybe settling down for a spell would help him.

The next day was the ultimate fun—nothing extravagant, nothing scathingly sexy, just the simple fun of playing house with three amazing guys.

Thor got up ridiculously early and snagged coffees and an actual old-fashioned newspaper, and the four of us sat out on the deck and read it, passing around the different sections like people in old movies.

Later I washed dishes with Zeus to some 80s hair band that he wanted me to hear. Even that felt special.

I guess there's nothing like constant danger to make you appreciate everyday things.

The porch overlooked a hillside of trees and homes, sloping down to the ocean that was wild with whitecaps. It was like being in a treehouse with the hottest guys alive.

One of the things we confirmed from the newspaper was that the man in distress would be okay. He was recovering well.

Thor had really and truly saved him.

The other good news was that none of the supermarket shoppers had gotten my picture. It looked like all they had was a bad sketch of me, complete with wig and the beauty mark.

But, oh my god, this sketch! Even my sisters wouldn’t recognize me. I barely recognized myself. There were sketches of Thor, too, but they weren’t as bad.

“It's like they tried to make me look as dorky as possible. What’s with my cheeks? And my nose? And I don’t have lopsided eyes!”

Zeus just laughed. “Be happy that it doesn’t look like you!”

“I know, but I feel like they’re trying to troll me.”

Later that day, Zeus got into doing some repair work on the deck. I loved that he was so handy. The ultimate in competence porn, my Zeus.

Thor went out and started weeding his garden; we might not be there to see it grow, but Thor cared about things like that.

Odin enlarged the sad images of us and printed them off and colored them in like Andy Warhol pictures. I wasn't so sure about this art idea, considering my lopsided eyes and horror show nose, but I loved that it was such a fuck-you thing to do.

“How long do you think we can stay here?” I asked him while he cut mats.

“I’m hoping for a few weeks,” he said. “But who knows, maybe longer. Ideally long enough to plan and execute the Prime Royale job.”

They were talking about bringing Matteo in on it now. It would be like a bank robbery supergroup.

Odin finished his masterpieces, eventually. He hung them on the wall above the blue flame fireplace and called Thor and me in to see.

We gushed over them, possibly embarrassing Odin, but he really had created something wonderful.

“I will admit that I was skeptical,” I said, “but now I love them!” I turned to Thor. “You look especially notorious.”

Thor grinned. “And you look especially sassy!”

I hugged Odin. “Best. Most wanted pictures. Ever.”

“Enough,” Odin growled. “Who’s hungry?”

“I am,” Thor said.

“So so,” I said.

Odin yelled the question down to Zeus, who boomed back an enthusiastic fuck yeah !

I snorted. My guys were always hungry, and not just the sexy kind of hunger. Dudes will pretty much always eat; this was a new and amusing thing that I definitely hadn’t experienced growing up in a home full of girls.

Odin looped an arm over my shoulder. “I’m gonna suggest an appetizer of almond croissants and then…Thai?”

“Thai and pizza,” Zeus said, bounding in.

“Good with me,” I exclaimed.

Thor grabbed the keys. Another thing I’d learned is that outlaws rarely order delivery food, which made a lot of sense. Just take-out.

For our first stop, we headed into croissant express. My bandits picked out a selection of croissants while I teased them about having dessert before dinner.

“Always, goddess,” Thor said with a wink.

I rolled my eyes. “I would insist you eat something wholesome first.”

“Is that right?” Thor said as we made our way out the door and back to where our shiny SUV was parked. “What did you have in mind?”

I had backseat hijinks in mind, to be perfectly honest, but just then, Zeus let out a string of profanity, and Thor gripped my arm—hard—stopping me in my tracks.

Zeus and Odin both had their weapons out, hanging discreetly down by their sides, and were moving ahead, or more melting slowly ahead, disappearing into the row of cars parked along the street.

“What's going on?” I whispered to Thor, pulse pounding. Had ZOX caught up to us after all?

“Check out the windshield,” he said.

I squinted in the bright sun, and then I saw it—a scrap of paper stuffed under the windshield wiper.

“Maybe it's an ad for a carwash,” I said.

“Then why isn't there one on every car?” Thor grumbled.

“Oh,” I said.

Thor and I backed up to lean against the rough stucco wall outside of the bakery, scanning the scene while we waited for Zeus and Odin to attend to their project of skulking invisibly around the row of cars along the street.

What they clearly weren’t attending to was reading the note, because it was just sitting there still on the windshield, and I was burning with curiosity at this point.

“Maybe it's nothing,” I said. “Maybe it’s a carwash ad, but everybody else who got it drove away. Wasn't Odin saying just last night that the ZOX guys were supposed to be poking around in Maine? They have no idea that we're here.”

“When you’re in hiding, no note’s a good note,” Thor said.

“Shouldn’t they just read it?” I asked.

“They will,” Thor said. “Whoever left the note is probably lurking around, so that's the focus now. The note will be there.”

We waited for what seemed like forever, scanning the street from our post against the wall.

Ten minutes later, Odin appeared next to the SUV.

He nodded over at us, and Thor nodded back.

Odin plucked the paper from the windshield and shook it gently to unfold it, holding it by the corners and studying it with a frown.

Zeus went over next to him, and they both scrutinized it. Zeus took a picture of it.

“Suspense definitely building,” I said. “Will they be coming over and showing us anytime soon?”

“Right?” Thor said. “What the hell.”

“Can't we go over there?” I had no doubt that Zeus had thoroughly checked the SUV for bombs by now.

“Let them do their work,” Thor said.

Sigh.

Finally Odin was heading back toward us. He nodded as he passed and went right into the bakery.

“Hello,” I mumbled. “Any day with the note.”

Thor snorted.

“Or was this just an elaborate excuse for more croissants?”

“I wish,” Thor said.

Odin came back out with the note in a plastic bag. “Come on,” he said.

I pushed off the wall and followed him and Thor back to the vehicle.

Zeus nodded at the dry cleaner that we’d parked in front of. “I’m gonna go in there and see if they saw who dropped this. If anybody saw anything, it’ll be these guys.”

“Agreed,” Odin said. “I’ll try that deli. Can you two maybe Google that shit? I airdropped the image to you.”

Thor and I took out our phones. Sure enough, we each had an image of the note. I clicked on it and opened it up. The note began with the words “TAKE HEED,” written in loopy cursive. The rest of it was a typewritten passage several sentences long.

Passion has helped us, but can do so no more. It will in future be our enemy. Reason, cold, calculating, unimpassioned reason, must furnish all the materials for our future support and defence.

“Well, if this is a car wash ad, it’s a shitty one,” I said.

“No shit,” Thor said.

I typed the text into a search bar and got my answer instantly. “It’s the second to last paragraph of Lincoln’s ‘Lyceum Address,’ given in January of 1838—when he was twenty-nine.”

“Weird,” Thor said.

“I know, right? Can you imagine a twenty-nine-year-old of today saying anything close to this? Like coming up with even one of these sentences?”

“No, I mean it’s weird as a note that somebody would send to somebody like us,” he clarified.

“Yeah, that too.”

“It reads like a warning,” Thor said. “Don't you think?”

“ Take heed definitely suggests a warning. But a warning about what? Too much passion?” I frowned. “Wait, should I be insulted?”

“You do inspire a great deal of passion, it’s true,” Thor said. “But passion comes in many forms. It could be a warning about getting too riled up about anything.”