Page 18 of The Wolf’s Bullied Mate (Moondust Hollow Wolves #2)

“How can I make her forgive me?” I paced Ryder’s office, staring fiercely at the ugly chandelier. “How do I even begin to apologize to her?”

“I always knew he was dramatic,” Caden whistled. “But I didn’t know he was this dramatic.”

“That’s Oliver for you,” Ryder nodded.

“It’s always the sweet and kind ones who end up being the craziest,” Caden smirked. “I didn’t know Oliver had such a dark past.”

I glared at him, but the look only made his smile wider.

I sighed. “You’re right. I’m going crazy over here. I made a mistake years ago—a terrible mistake, it seems, and now I have to suffer the consequences. Talk about the past biting me in the ass.”

“You didn’t know,” Ryder said. “You only wanted to tease Pauline.”

“My intentions may not have been bad, but I can’t change the bad things that happened because of me,” I sighed again.

“Exactly!” Caden exclaimed. “The past is the past. What really matters is the present and the future.”

“Not for Pauline,” sadness filled my heart. “She’s still living through the pain.” I turned around and paced the length of the room again. “I need to make it up to her.”

“First, you need to stop stomping on my rug,” Ryder glared at me. “Sit down.”

“I can’t,” I said. “I won’t be able to keep still.”

“Then don’t sit, but please—for the love of the Moon Goddess—stop moving.”

I stopped in the middle of the room, under the ugly chandelier.

Ryder sighed. “Better.” He folded his hands in front of himself. “Now, as for your problem—there’s nothing else to do but convince your wife that you genuinely didn’t intend to hurt her in the past and that—for the rest of your life—you will make amends to her.”

“The rest of your life?” Caden said. “Wow, that sounds like a long commitment.”

“In case you haven’t realized yet, Caden,” Ryder looked his way now, “Oliver’s problem is not just that his wife believes he hurt her—it’s also the fact that he’s mating.”

“I’m—what?!” I exclaimed.

I really needed to sit down now. I plopped into the chair next to Caden, who had his mouth gaping open.

“I’m… mating?” I said in wonder and apprehension.

“You’re plenty serious about Pauline, the way I see it,” Ryder said. “I would dare say all the emotional turmoil you’re experiencing is because you’re in love with her, Oliver. That’s why her suffering makes you suffer. And that’s also why you want the world for her.”

Silence fell in the room. I pondered what my alpha said for a long moment.

“I… might be,” I said. “I did get the impression that she could be my mate when we slept together.”

Caden whistled again. “You slept with her?”

“I had to as per the rules of the arranged marriage agency, but it was something we both wanted to do,” I explained.

Both Ryder and Caden gave me a long look.

“What?” I asked.

“She’s att—” Caden started saying.

“He’ll figure it out on his own,” Ryder interrupted him.

Caden shrugged his shoulders. “You’re right; it is more fun that way.”

“You bet,” Ryder smirked.

Annoyance bubbled in my heart. “What are you two talking about?”

“Nothing,” Ryder chuckled. “Back to your problem—invite her out to dinner and then apologize to her.”

“What if someone else comes up to us, someone who bullied her? It’ll destroy the mood,” I said.

“Then make a good dinner at home. You can cook well, can’t you?” Caden smiled.

“And buy her flowers. You know what kind she likes the most, right?” Ryder asked.

I thought for a moment. “No, I don’t. I know her favorite color is red, though.”

“Can’t go wrong with red roses, then,” Ryder said.

I nodded, taking a mental note of their advice. “And what should I say?”

“Nothing you’ve prepared beforehand,” Caden advised. “The apology has to come from the bottom of your heart. Be genuine.”

“And if it doesn’t work,” Ryder added. “Then try again in a week.”

“And again and again,” Caden chanted.

“But that’s-”

“You want her, don’t you? You’re not afraid of having to work for it, right?” Ryder chuckled.

“I’m not… afraid,” I said. “I just don’t want to come off as a creep.”

“You’ll figure it out. But, in my sincere opinion, she will come to accept your apology sooner than you think,” Ryder assured.

“I sure hope so,” I sighed.

***

In the evening, I had dinner all prepared—red wine, mashed potatoes, and steak cooked medium rare, just the way Pauline had told me she liked it back when we had been talking via text messages.

I held a bouquet of red roses in my hand, waiting for the sound of the door unlocking as she arrived home.

I had picked up Ray on my own earlier, and he was now playing with toy cars in his room.

When I heard the door open, I came out of the dining room with the bouquet of roses.

Pauline’s eyes widened. “What’s the occasion?”

I took a deep breath and then gave her a serious look. “I wanted to talk to you, but let’s eat first. These are for you,” I gave her the flowers.

She put them to her nose and inhaled. A pleased smile appeared on her lips.

“They’re beautiful,” she said.

My heart soared.

Pauline looked at the dining table with surprise but said nothing as she sat down to eat. I put some of the meat on her plate, then the potatoes, and poured her wine. I did the same for myself, and our meal together began.

We chatted about her day at work. She was adjusting quickly and enjoyed learning her new role.

Finally, after we had eaten, she said, “That was delicious, Oliver. Thank you for making us dinner.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” I smiled, hiding my hands under the table. I played with my thumbs to let go of some of my nervous energy.

“What did you want to talk about?” she said, giving me a serious look.

I took a deep breath then released it. “I wanted to apologize for what I did to you…” I trailed off.

The apology had to come from the bottom of my heart, but that task was easier said than done.

However, Pauline’s life so far hadn’t been easy either—all because of me.

I would suffer if it meant I could help her feel better.

“You’ve already apologized,” she said in an emotionless tone.

I let out a sigh. “I know. But I don’t even know how to convey how sorry I am,” I said the truth.

“I never intended to hurt you. I never wanted the whole school to go after you, to bully you. But it’s all my fault anyway, I’m not denying that.

I just… I want to make it up to you, and I will, every day for the rest of my life, if you’ll let me. ”

“The rest of your life…” Pauline’s eyes widened.

Just as I thought I was getting through to her, the cautious look returned to her gaze.

“I’ll think about your apology,” she said in the same monotone as earlier.

My heart fell, but some hope remained—at least she hadn’t outright refused to consider my words.

“Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to retire to bed early—I’m still adjusting to shift work, and want to get some good rest,” she said.

I nodded. She got up from her seat and went to her room.

As I cleaned up after the dinner, I wondered if I had really made any progress tonight or if—like my friends had said—I would have to repeat the apology a thousand times before she finally forgave me.

I would wait for her forever if necessary.

***

The next Sunday, I told Pauline and Ray I had a surprise prepared for them. Ray immediately got excited, and Pauline looked interested, too. We dressed up and got in the car. I drove them all the way to the outskirts of Fairlake, where our small but fun amusement park was located.

Ray looked overjoyed at the prospect of trying out the rides.

The Sunday went by in peaceful camaraderie filled with Ray’s laughter and exclamations of wonder.

He was the one that decided what we did for the day.

Watching the child’s pure joy made happiness bloom in my heart too.

Pauline looked much more relaxed as well.

That part of her was easy to figure out—when her kid was happy, she felt joy, too.

She was a good mother, caring so much for her son’s well-being.

I took this opportunity to bond with Ray. I let him ride on my shoulders when he was too tired to walk. I bought him cotton candy. I watched his every smile.

I really felt like a father today.

I didn’t care that Ray wasn’t my son. I was already growing attached to him. He was Pauline’s child, and that fact mattered to me. Everything Pauline cared for I would love as well—simple as that.

We spent some genuine quality time together. For the first time in a while I wholeheartedly felt the warmth of being a family with Pauline and Ray by my side. I hoped I could hold on to this feeling forever.

Yet I still had to figure out how to keep making up for my past misdeeds to Pauline.

***

When we returned home, Pauline laid Ray down to sleep. Then she and I sat in the living room, sipping hot chocolate.

“Can I ask you about something related to your visions?” I couldn’t stifle my curiosity when it came to Pauline’s talents. I knew so little about them, after all. I hoped if I learned more, I would understand her better.

Pauline hesitated for a moment, turning the cup this and that way in her hands. After a moment, she spoke. “Yes, what would you like to know?” She gave me a curious look.

“What kinds of visions do you have exactly?” I asked.

“If you’re asking about categories of visions, there are none, really,” she said.

“I just… see something in the future that pushes me towards a decision in the present. One thing is constant about my visions—they always come true, so I can’t ignore them unless I want something bad to happen to me and Ray. ”

“So that vision about you being chased by wolves—that’s going to happen regardless of what you do,” I gave her an alarmed look.

“Yes, it will,” she nodded. “But the vision’s feeling was clear—as long as I stick close to you, nothing bad will happen to me and Ray.”

“I can’t be around you all the time, though,” I said. “I’m at work, you’re at work, Ray’s at the kindergarten….”

“But at the time I’m going to be chased by wolves, I’m going to be with Ray, and you’re going to come to my rescue,” she said calmly.

I shook my head. “Is it that simple?”

“That’s what the vision showed me. The visions always come true,” she repeated.

“Have the visions often protected you from bad events in the past?” I asked the next question that popped up in my mind.

“As long as I didn’t ignore them, yes,” she said.

“I detested them as a teenager, but when I moved out to Lone Bite, I learned to understand and follow their directions better. They are a gift from the Moon Goddess. They should be cherished, not hated. The visions don’t protect me from bad outcomes directly, but they tell me how to move toward a better future.

For that aid, I’m grateful to the Goddess. ”

I nodded. I looked down at the cup in my hands, swirling the warm liquid around. “I’m sorry for calling you a freak.”

Pauline shook her head. “In a sense you’re right. The visions make me odd. I could indeed be called a freak of nature.”

I looked back at her. The way she so easily brought herself down made me wonder—was the bullying at our school the only time she had been abused? Sometimes, she had this grimness to her, like she carried an indescribable burden. My intuition told me there was more to Pauline’s story.

I didn’t want to imagine she had endured further bullying, but I had to make sure. “Pauline, please tell me: was the bullying you suffered at our school the only abuse you went through?”

I knew I had made a mistake as soon as the words left my mouth. Pauline froze, like a deer in the headlights. Before I could say she didn’t have to answer my question, she rose from her seat and bolted out of the room.

I didn’t chase after her. The fact she had run away from me again when I asked her a difficult question told me all I needed to know about the matter.

Anger boiled in my heart. My hunch had to be right.

Pauline had definitely been abused by other people besides the kids at our school.

Had Ray’s father done it to her? Or someone else?

What had pushed her to finally use me as a way to get away from Lone Bite?

“Fuck,” I put the cup aside and clenched my fists. I wanted to punch something. I wanted to use all this angry energy to right all the wrongs against Pauline.

How could such a wonderful woman have suffered so much?

What could I do to make her world right for her again?

I knew at this moment, even more certainly than before—I loved Pauline. I wanted her to be my mate. I wanted to spend forever with her.

I just hoped she would welcome me to stay by her side one day.