Page 27

*what in the epic adventure*

“W HAT?” I LOOKED AT H AMBURGER M AN and realized he had no idea what he was doing, which totally destroyed my last shred of hope. I managed to sound calm when I said, “No, um, Jackson didn’t make any wishes.”

“Didn’t he?” Hamburger Man said, staring out the windshield in front of him.

“ Did you?” I asked Jackson, because there wasn’t a question in Hamburger Man’s tone.

And when his eyes met mine, I knew that he had.

I wasn’t sure how that could be, because he’d never said anything. “You made your own wishes?”

“Yeah, I mean, I—”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” My mind started whirring as it sifted through the memories of everything we’d done together in an attempt to undo the lore. “Why did you help me try and reverse the magic if you knew I was wrong?”

“I didn’t know—”

“How could you not know?” I said, angry. I felt like a fool, like the guy I’d considered a friend had been messing with me all along. “And did you seriously wish to be blond , by the way?”

I knew it was unfair to mock him about wishing for the exact same thing I’d wanted , but I was too upset to be fair.

“I definitely did not,” he said, his eyebrows furrowed like I’d offended him with that question. “At first I thought I was a grantee, but then you made so much sense with your explanation that I doubted—”

“But why would you run around with me while I tried transferring this if you knew you weren’t getting my wishes?”

“I didn’t—”

“Sometimes things are sketchy with vague wishes,” Hamburger Man interrupted.

“What does that mean?” Jackson asked, and his cheeks were red as he looked back and forth between me and Hamburger Man.

“It means I’m agreeing with you that you probably didn’t know for sure you were a grantee.”

“How would he not know, though?” I stared out the windshield at the blurry movement and said, “If he made a wish and got it, he’d know.”

“Wait for it,” Nana murmured, her eyes still closed, her head still on my shoulder. I felt her small hand patting my knee, and I knew she was trying to tell me to shut up and listen.

But I didn’t want to.

This wasn’t fair—I wanted to rage.

“Here are your wishes,” Hamburger Man said, flicking his fingers in front of his face.

An image appeared on the dashboard monitor, an image showing the pack I’d sent down the hole.

It showed my wishes, carefully written on Nana’s journal paper.

I wish for noninvisibility. I want boobs (nothing huge, just SOMETHING), blond hair (my mother refuses to let me dye it), and to grow past the shrimp-height I’ve been stuck at for two years (six inches would be perfect).

I wish to be appointed as one of the seventh-grade senatorial candidates.

I wish to no longer be awkward. I want to be able to say the RIGHT things in uncomfortable situations (without verbal diarrhea and oversharing), and not choke whenever people are watching me.

I wish for my mom to meet a good man and for them to fall madly in love.

“I thought they were private,” I snapped, embarrassed. It was mortifying to see them in print.

“Shhhh,” Nana said.

“I’m an equal opportunity sharer, so here are his,” he said, and Hamburger Man flicked his fingers again.

My wishes disappeared and another set popped up, these printed in Jackson’s all-caps handwriting. Instead of a packet, it looked like he’d scrawled them onto a tiny scrap of paper that was rubber-banded to one giant piece of pyrite.

The “rock” that’d hit my rock.

Wishes:

FIND A BEST FRIEND or FRIEND GROUP

GROW AND CHANGE APPEARANCE SO I’M LESS INVISIBLE

GO ON EPIC ADVENTURES

GET MY FIRST KISS OUT OF THE WAY WITHOUT EMBARRASSING MYSELF

I swallowed, and reread his wishes.

“Please make them disappear,” Jackson said, sounding as mortified as I’d felt.

“But see, Emma,” Hamburger Man said, “his hair and physique are the result of number two, and your shenanigans at the portal are the result of number three—and also probably number one. Vague wishes bring mysterious results.”

Hamburger Man flicked his fingers again and the wishes disappeared.

Suddenly it was quiet in the truck.

Jackson’s hand touched my arm, startling me. “Emma, I didn’t know—”

“That your funny ‘epic adventure’ consisted of me chasing something that was never going to happen? Yeah, no,” I said, gritting my teeth and trying not to get emotional. That’d be babyish and ridiculous. “You knew.”

“I wondered,” he said, “but I also thought you could’ve been right, so why not help you , just in case.”

I felt so stupid as he said that, because so many things made sense now. Of course he’d happily gone along with every bizarre thing I’d asked him to do. I’d thought he was so sweet for calling Auntie Bev and helping me, but it was just an entertaining adventure for him.

Epic, bro.

And I’d felt— man, I am so pathetic— lucky that Jackson wanted to be my friend. It’d felt special from the day he’d showed up at school wearing the ugly shirt, and it only got better when he went with me to see Archie, bought the fish, texted me memes when I was sad—I’d loved it all.

He’d become the best friend I never knew I wanted.

The perfect best friend.

But the reality was that Jackson wished for a best friend, and when I showed up, he grabbed me because he thought I was his wish. It wasn’t special; it wasn’t like he’d chosen me because he liked me.

He hadn’t even chosen me, really.

He’d taken me because he thought the universe had chosen me for him.

I don’t know why that mattered, but it did.

It mattered a lot.

Because while everything in my life seemed to be changing around me in ways I didn’t like, the one change that felt good and right was Jackson.

But he probably didn’t feel the same way at all, because he thought that we were supposed to be friends.

I sat there, staring out the window as the world blurred by, and I realized that I cared less about the fact that I was very definitely not a grantee than I did that Jackson wasn’t really my friend at all.

“Can I go sit in the back?” I asked Hamburger Man, needing to disappear before I started bawling like a baby.

“What do you mean, sit in the back?” Jackson asked, his eyebrows scrunched together.

“She means that she doesn’t want to sit up here anymore,” Nana Marie said softly, like she didn’t want to make him feel bad. “Climb over the seat and go, kiddo; I’ll come with you.”

“Yeah, give it a go, kid,” Hamburger Man said, eyes on the windshield. “But better make sure you’re holding onto something before we go back to human speeds, or you’ll be a pinball back there.”

“No,” Jackson said, raising his voice. “That’s terrible advice, Emma, and you don’t need to be a pinball. If you stay here, I promise not to talk to you.”

“How long do I have?” I asked, ignoring Jackson. “Before we hit human speeds?”

“About an hour,” Hamburger Man said. “I was hauling butt on the way there because I was afraid I’d ruined the universe, but I can’t go back at that speed, now that I know I’ve got two babies on board.”

“So you didn’t ruin the universe?” Jackson asked, but he was still looking at me as he asked it.

“Not this time,” Hamburger Man said. “Everyone got the right wishes.”

“Even the fourth grantee?” Nana said, eyes still closed.

“Even the fourth,” he murmured, and the two of them exchanged a look.

“Who is the fourth?” I asked.

“Can’t tell,” he said. “But if you’re moving to the back, you better go now before it gets bumpy.”

“Okay,” I said, unbuckling my seat belt.

“Emma,” Jackson said in a quiet voice. “Please.”

Nana patted his knee before unbuckling and climbing over the seat with me.