Page 57 of The Winter of Our Discontent (Pride and Prejudice Variations #1)
ELIZABETH DARCY
“I hate to admit this, Mr Darcy, but you have a small streak of genius in you.”
“Small you say? There is nothing small about me, madam.”
I sensed he was teasing me with some kind of innuendo I did not yet comprehend, and this annoyed me. “Hmm. You may be right. Perhaps I went too far and overstated the size of your genius. Should I instead have said minuscule, sir?”
He chuckled and kissed my hair. We were settled by the fire in my room. Not a night passed that we did not retreat there to usher in the mysterious dark.
“Well, do not keep me in suspense. How brilliant was my dictate?”
“My sisters are terribly excited to be given responsibilities of their own. Even Georgiana, who I believe suffered a shock of guilt to hear the litany of my uses, is determined to take over some part of my duties.”
“What part is that? ”
“I have put her in charge of our musical gatherings and morning callers. She is to be chief hostess until I regain my vigour which, come to think of it, I may not wish to do too soon.”
“You are teasing me.”
“I am not. She is determined to conquer her shyness, and I suspect she intends to face her looming presentation into society with sufficient composure to impress you.”
“Forgive me, Elizabeth, but this I will believe when I have seen it. What else?”
“Jane is to help me with my visits to the tenants.”
“That is a good choice.”
“Well, it was a sly choice, for she spoke up insistently on the matter. I can only suspect she will be out and about and run into Mr Yardley now and again.”
“Poor man.”
“Poor man, indeed. Speaking of which, Kitty wishes to assume some of the chores required of household management. You will have to survive a few of her choices for dinner until she learns the trick of it.”
“As I did when you arrived? I began to think we were going bankrupt when my poor cook was forbidden to send up a fish course.”
“We are a hundred miles from the sea, and I do not care for lake trout. Besides, I funded the expansion of the kitchen garden with what we would have spent on having turbot and salmon brought in.”
“From which you secretly intended to feed the children in school. Are they to eat my lake trout as well?”
“How abominable you are to see the thoughts in my head, sir.”
“I have eyes in my head, and your skull is transparent as glass. I know all your little projects and what they cost me down to the last farthing.”
“Dear me. I suppose you must scrabble for means now to afford your town mistresses.”
“All ten of them, yes. With ponies, phaetons, jewels, and whatnot.”
“Whatnot, I understand, is shockingly expensive. I suppose they are all voluptuous beauties and do not have a bone showing anywhere.”
He ran a finger along my sadly prominent collarbone. He knew I was insecure about how thin I had become. All his assurances to the contrary, I still worried he found my body off-putting.
“They are plump as Christmas geese,” he murmured tenderly. “One has six chins at last count, and two of them waddle and honk when they walk. I cannot help but think of gravy and dumplings when I visit them.”
How did he do it? I laughed aloud. From the dressing room, I heard Wilson stifle a chuckle.
She was, by default, there in the evening as often as not.
She and my husband were in solidarity. They meant to care for me, and he considered her presence a necessary concession.
I gave up weeks earlier trying to convince them I was perfectly sound.
They had been through a great deal together, I supposed, willing me to live, forcing me to live, and I felt it was only fair to let them fret until the memory faded into the far-distant past.
“And Mary?” Mr Darcy asked eventually.
“She is committed to the school and Mr Hodge’s poor relief. This leaves me free to build an infirmary for Mr Yardley to induce him to stay.”
“You are much mistaken, madam, if you think I will give you one more penny with which to occupy your time. Leisure is what Yardley orders for you, and leisure you will have. Should we not plan an expedition of shopping for my sisters?”
“Oh yes, the poor dears. But they will be quite overborne by extravagance after having nothing at all. Wilson will make over half my gowns for them and—” I jumped up and went to my escritoire, “I have saved this for their shoes and linens and whatnot .”
“What is this pile of money?”
“This is the pin money I have hoarded.”
“Hoarded?”
“I wished to be free to run away whenever I wanted.”
“Did you? Let me see that. Hmm. You would have got all the way to Brighton and had a shabby room for almost a year.”
“At which time you would have had me run to ground by hired men, rousted out of my hidey-hole, and bundled away to Scotland.”
“And I still will if you ever think to run away. Here, put this back in your little hoard box. I have already set up my sisters with funds of their own.”
“But will you not have to make some economy?”
“I believe the mistresses of the honks and waddles have become a burden on my purse. I will issue them their congé in the morning.”
“And your other plump lady geese?”
“My dumplings? No, madam. You will not induce me to let them go. Now, will you not crawl into bed, my love? You can barely keep your eyes open.”
Wilson came in from the dressing room, brushed my hair and plaited it while my husband sipped brandy by the fire.
He tucked me in, kissed my forehead, and ordered me not to have any disturbing dreams. I had suffered a few since my illness, and he left his door ajar, so he could sit with me until I settled after a terror.
I sleepily considered telling him how much I loved him, but I felt shy of saying so and only managed to reach for his hand and clumsily begin. “I-I…”
Perhaps because Wilson was still in the dressing room, he interrupted me in a low voice so as not to be overheard. “And I you, Elizabeth. When next we are alone, I will tell you how much.”