Page 4 of The Viscount and the Wallflower (The Unlikely Betrothal Series #4)

Chapter 4

T he next day, Lily struggled with her muddled thoughts. She wasn’t certain what she wanted anymore. She had resigned herself to be a spinster who would enjoy attending the theatre and reading all the latest books, perhaps hearing about Rosina’s latest conquests. Assuming her friend remained resolved in her desire to remain an unmarried widow. She would have been perfectly at ease and content with such a life. Then somehow her life became far more complicated than all that.

There was Lord Knox, who was a mystery in his own right. He didn’t seem ready to profess any kind of love or adoration for her. Far from it, in fact. Nor did he befit a man who was teetering towards a proposal, but he had a kind warmth to him. He sought her out the previous afternoon and spent a few hours by her side after the Pall Mall tournament, although she noticed he was still distracted at times. Lord Knox admitted to her he wasn’t good at such matters of courtship, and she could appreciate his honesty. Besides, neither was she.

She was almost certain she would feel nothing for the man beyond friendship, but that wouldn’t matter in the least to her father. Her determined father had his own expectations, and he was also the one who held all the control over her life. If she had to marry Lord Knox, she was at least fairly certain he would never harm her and would allow her to live a life close to the one she had imagined for herself. She didn’t picture him as a passionate husband, or even one attentive enough to involve himself with her interests beyond casual conversation.

In some ways, she thought such a match could be perfect for her. She would be out from under her father’s control and would be able to mostly do what she pleased with an agreeable husband. She had never thought that love, or passion, or even attraction would be part of her future, and never thought to hope for such things.

But then Lord Callan had made his way into her sphere, and he became quite difficult to dislodge from her every thought. She had never felt more seen by another person than she did in his presence. She wasn’t aware of the power of such a revelation, and it only pulled her in further when she noticed how he gazed at her. No one in her entire life had truly seen her before. Perhaps Rosina, but that wasn’t the same. She wasn’t seen for her intelligence, her personality, and certainly not her appearance. The perpetual wallflower in her own life, and yet the most intriguing man she had ever met appeared to have taken notice of her.

She very well could have imagined all of it. It could have been a foolish girl’s wishful thinking, misreading the man’s polite, good-natured intentions. To think that the wallflower of the ton would attract one of the most handsome men was something that would happen in one of her beloved plays, but certainly not in real life.

Lily chastised herself for only thinking about his appearance. Doing so was shallow and didn’t do him justice. That was the real tragedy of the matter. He was far more than just handsome. He was witty, clever, intelligent, and passionate. She blushed thinking about him as being passionate, but she imagined he was quite experienced in all the things that occurred between a woman and a man that Rosina had told her about.

“Are you all right, my lady?” Lord Knox asked from beside her.

She refocused her attention on her horse. After they broke their fast that morning, a riding group organized to tour the estate before they would enjoy a picnic by the pond. She hadn’t ridden since before the season began, so it would be in her best interest to cease with the woolgathering and focus on controlling her mare.

“Indeed,” she replied. “Just getting comfortable in the saddle again.”

Lord Demming approached, traveling in the opposite direction, catching Lord Knox’s attention. “I forgot I have to get a missive out straight away. Would you be willing to come back with me and then we’ll catch up to the group?”

“Of course, my lord,” Lord Knox replied. He looked over at her and gave her a small smile and a nod. And she waved him off.

At least she wouldn’t have to attempt conversation with him when her mind was muddled, which wasn’t a state she had ever been accustomed to.

“Lady Lily,” that intoxicating rich baritone called out from beside her. She hadn’t even noticed he had caught up to her.

“Lord Callan.” She wasn’t typically at a loss for words, just a loss for someone to speak the words to, but for the first time, she struggled to find something to say.

“I saw Knox returned to the stables, so I thought you could use a bit of company.”

“That would be appreciated, thank you.”

Lily wanted to roll her eyes at how high her voice became when she responded. She wasn’t sure she sounded like herself—more like a simpering miss than that of her own voice. Lily drew a deep breath, steadying herself. Perhaps she could make him do most of the talking this time.

She glanced over at him and found him looking back at her, then shifted her gaze back to the front. “Why don’t you tell me something no one knows about you?” she asked.

He remained quiet, so she glanced at him again, finding him in thought as if he warred with what he wished to disclose. She watched him, eager to learn what he might share about himself.

“I write,” he finally said.

She wasn’t sure what she expected him to say, but she didn’t think it was that.

“What do you write?”

“All manner of things. Journal entries, short stories, poems, even tried my hand at a few plays.”

She turned her head to look at him again. He seemed nervous to share such personal information about himself, and it endeared him to her even more than he already was.

“That explains why you asked me about what I enjoyed most in the plays I’ve seen. I am impressed, my lord. I would love to read some of your stories or works sometime.”

A smile played at the corners of his lips. “I’ll think about it.”

“Do you not wish for anyone to know about your writing? I would think it was such a thing others would know about you.”

He glanced forward and drew a breath. She allowed her gaze to glance lower and noticed how his thigh appeared even more taut, and she swallowed hard. What was it about his thighs that she couldn’t stop looking? When she had never noticed them at all on a man before Lord Callan.

“I have told no one that secret about myself before. My writing is for me, a way to express myself with anything that I might be feeling at the moment.”

“I believe I may be the opposite,” she replied.

“What do you mean?”

“That is what reading and the theatre are for me. I lose myself in books and plays because I relate to the emotion and angst of the characters. Perhaps I even live vicariously through them at times.” She regretted the words as soon as they left her lips. What happened to letting him do more of the talking and not adding to her muddled thoughts ?

She kept her gaze forward, not wanting to meet his eye, or to know if he stared at her, or worse, pitied her.

“I understand,” he said. “I do the same with characters I write.”

“I wouldn’t think a handsome viscount would have much need to escape his life,” she said, knowing she was being far too bold, but each of their positions in life was not the same.

“So you think I’m handsome?”

Lily looked at him again, this time so he could see how she rolled her eyes. “You know you are. And wealthy, and titled, and a man. From my vantage point, it would appear you don’t have all that much to live through others to achieve.”

His brow furrowed as if she struck a nerve. “If we go by your logic, neither do you. Unless you wish to be a man, that is. Because, from everything I see before me, you are indeed a woman with a titled father, and a beautiful one at that.”

“Don’t say things you don’t mean, my lord.” She didn’t want fake compliments and pretense between them. It was wholly unnecessary and did nothing to change who she was.

“Which part? That you are a woman? Please forgive me if I was incorrect on that point,” he said, giving her a wolfish grin, and it did things to her insides.

“You know which part,” she replied, looking back forward. “No one has ever thought of me as beautiful. My own mama would balk at such a statement.”

“Then perhaps your mama should be horsewhipped.”

Her head shot in his direction. “My lord!”

He met her gaze, and she couldn’t look away from the hold his intense green eyes had on her. “I will speak plainly so that perhaps you will hear me this time. You are among the most beautiful of women. These other chits don’t hold a candle to you, and I won’t have you, or anyone else, saying otherwise.”

Lily swallowed hard, and all words and coherent thought left her head. She looked back at the path and fought to get control over her mind and body. She tensed and delighted at his words. The way he spoke, she knew he meant what he said, or at least believed he did, but it did nothing to assuage her growing attachment to the man, which wasn’t ideal.

They arrived at the location for the picnic before they could speak anything else to each other. He climbed down from his horse. Before she could do so herself, he was in front of her and his hands were on her hips, lifting her down.

The feel of his large, powerful hands on her sent electric pulses throughout her entire body. She had never experienced such a sensation before, and when he released his hands, her skin grew cold from the loss of his touch. She looked up at him, and her heart flipped from the soft smile he gave her.

“May I escort you?” he asked, shifting to stand beside her and extending his arm.

She tucked her hand in the crook, and the electricity returned when she gripped his muscular forearm.

There were five blankets already set out, with baskets in the middle of each one. Lord Callan led her to the furthest blanket from the other guests and helped her to seat herself before settling beside her. But not as close to her person as she’d prefer, if she were being honest. She had to remind herself that they were in full view of the other guests, and besides, he would not marry her, even if he found her to be as beautiful as he said.

He prepared her a plate from the selections in the basket. She took the plate but didn’t meet his eye, keeping her chin down as she stared at the chicken, cheese, and fruit on her plate.

“Did I say something to upset you, my lady?”

“Not at all. It’s just…”

He glanced around to ensure no one was in earshot. “It’s just what? You can tell me.”

“I should have thanked you for your compliment. I apologize for the lack of manners. I am just not used to receiving them. So I guess what I am saying is thank you, my lord.”

“That is the fault of these idiots, and not one of your own doing. You need not apologize for their shortcomings,” he replied, all seriousness in his tone and not a single hit of pity, which she appreciated.

They fell into a prolonged silence again. Surprisingly, it wasn’t awkward. She glanced at him, just as he did the same, their gazes holding for a few seconds.

Lord Callan cleared his throat and glanced at his plate. “I didn’t ask where Lord Knox went. Was he going to rejoin the group?”

“He went back with Lord Demming, but I believe they were going to join everyone.” She glanced around and didn’t see him anywhere. If she were honest, his disappearance had not disappointed her. It gave her more time with Lord Callan, to whom she feared she could easily lose her heart if she wasn’t careful.

“I am grateful that you have allowed me to keep you company in his absence.”

“I enjoy your company,” she said before taking a bite of a piece of chicken.

The lopsided grin he gave her almost caused her to choke on the bite, but she quickly recovered.

“I very much enjoy spending time with you,” he replied .

She wasn’t certain where it came from, but a streak of boldness coursed through her. “Why have you never married, my lord?”