Page 19 of The Vanishing Cherry Blossom Bookshop

THREE

‘Only the gay and innocent and heartless.’

Upon knocking on her big sister’s door, she heard a brief ‘Yep’.

After a short pause, the door opened. Her sister’s carpet was a faint blue, a colour she wouldn’t describe as traditionally ‘girly’.

The only reason this caught her eye was because the room was practically empty.

She noticed the cardboard boxes stacked against the wall.

‘Sorry – you busy? Preparing for a house move must be hard work, huh?’

Dressed in a sweatsuit, her sister touched the rim of her black-framed glasses as she shook her head, saying that it wasn’t as bad as she expected.

Liar , Kaho thought bitterly to herself.

Her sister had a habit of bringing her fingertip to her glasses whenever she was being dishonest. Did she really think that Kaho hadn’t noticed?

Maybe she didn’t even know that she had developed such a habit.

Not that any of that mattered. Again, Kaho kept these thoughts to herself as she brought up the topic she was here to discuss.

‘So… Got any plans tomorrow, Shiho?’

‘Nope,’ Shiho answered without missing a beat. Her reply was as curt as before, but this time, she didn’t bring her hand up to her glasses.

‘Apparently, the cherry blossoms along the river have opened – you know, the ones on our school route. Chii sent me a message about them. I was wondering if you wanted to see them – go for a little Hanami together?’

‘Hanami? You mean just us two?’

‘Well, we walked that route together for six whole years, but we didn’t really get to see the cherry blossoms in full bloom, did we?’

‘That’s because we were usually on our spring break during peak season. We never went that way unless we were going to school.’

‘Exactly. So I thought it might be nice for us to go there together, before you leave.’

‘I don’t mind.’

The two of them fell into silence. Don’t I get any credit for mustering up the courage to ask you? thought Kaho. Then, she found herself saying something that even she didn’t see coming.

‘Is that all you have to say?’

‘What?’

‘It’s just?—’

Kaho stopped mid-sentence, too embarrassed to follow with the words that had floated into her mind. At the same time, she knew that this might be her only chance to say them.

‘From April, we’re going to start living apart from each other for the first time in our lives,’ Kaho continued. ‘In fact, since we’re twins, we were together even before we were born. Don’t you feel – something? At least a little bit emotional or sentimental or whatever?’

‘Well, I guess I feel—’ Shiho began. Then, touching her glasses again, she continued, ‘—like I need to thank the gods that I no longer have to worry about my ice?cream and purin suddenly disappearing.’

‘That goes both ways.’

‘And I don’t deny that, but Tae-chan has definitely been found guilty before.’

Tae-chan was their mother. At some point, the two of them had stopped calling her ‘Mum’ or ‘Mama,’ and began using her name instead.

If there was something that had prompted them to do so, Kaho could no longer remember.

But she was pretty sure that it was Shiho’s idea.

At least, according to their mother, it was Shiho who’d suddenly called her that one day.

Although, when this was mentioned to her, Shiho shrugged it off with a nonchalant ‘Did I?’ and that was the end of it.

As for Kaho, she simply followed her sister’s lead, never thinking much about it.

‘Whatever,’ Kaho said.

Then, holding up her hand, she continued, ‘Anyway, we’re going tomorrow. Don’t forget.’

‘Okay, then. Night.’

‘Goodnight.’

Once Kaho was on her way, her sister gently closed the door.

* * *

When Kaho was younger, she believed that she and Shiho were two halves of a whole.

In fact, according to their mother, even after they’d become old enough to be aware of the world around them, there were moments when she questioned whether the girls fully understood that they were two separate beings.

For instance, if Shiho finished her meal quickly, then Kaho, who had barely touched her food, would claim that she was full and stop eating.

Other times, Kaho would fall and scrape her knee, and Shiho would start to cry, saying that she, too, felt pain in the same spot.

There were even times when, if one of them had a particularly bad injury, say on her right knee, their mother would find mysterious welts on the other – also on the right knee.

However, whether it was because of her laid-back personality – she was, to put it positively, the happy-go-lucky type, and to put it bluntly, extremely na?ve – their mother didn’t find it particularly strange.

It might have also been because she was a first-time mother, but whatever it was, she just dismissed it as twins being twins.

Even their father wasn’t too bothered, believing that one of them had scratched herself because she wanted to be the same as her sister.

Still, their parents made sure that the two sisters were treated equally.

But then things began to shift, probably after they performed in the play at their preschool.

Shiho was given the role of Wendy, while Kaho played Tinkerbell.

Towards the beginning of the play, there was even a scene where Wendy and Tinker Bell – in other words, Shiho and Kaho – came to blows over Peter Pan.

At first, Kaho had been quite excited. Not only was she going to be playing a fairy, but she was also going to be wearing a costume that came with a pair of sheer wings.

She probably even believed, at least for a little while, that they would give her the ability to fly.

Wendy’s costume, on the other hand, was a dull-coloured, rather normal-looking dress.

Frankly speaking, Kaho had felt a little sorry for her sister.

Yet the more she learned about the story, the more she grew envious of Shiho.

While he called her ‘Tink’ affectionately, to Peter, Tinker Bell was merely his loyal companion whom he took for granted.

He was fond of Wendy, however, and she was therefore the one who got his special attention.

Kaho also watched the Disney film at the time, only to find that Tinker Bell had been turned into a character with no lines.

Rehearsals for the school play would have been just a few hours a day for no more than a month.

In this short period, Kaho was forced to experience the emotions that lay beyond likes and dislikes all at once – in other words, she had begun comparing herself to her sister, and that had awakened feelings of superiority and jealousy in her.

But a big part of the reason why Kaho couldn’t seem to forget about the performance was Shoma Hiiragi, the boy who played Peter Pan. Kaho was pretty sure that Shiho felt the same.

* * *

The next day came wrapped in pleasant spring sunshine.

It was the last Sunday of March. That week, her sister would leave home and start living on her own in Tokyo.

When she was accepted to medical school in the city – there weren’t any within commutable distance from their house – their father had taken a day off work to help her look for a flat.

They ended up choosing one that was close to the university.

Kaho hadn’t yet seen this so-called ‘new home’, but Shiho had mentioned to her that the building had incredibly tight security, which was exactly what their father had wanted.

Meanwhile, Kaho was going to attend a junior college near home, and that was simply because it was the only school she’d been accepted into.

Which was only to be expected, as, unlike Shiho, she had stopped taking her studies seriously after she passed the junior-high entrance exams.

It wasn’t as though they had commuted to and from school together every single day.

But still, this could be the last time they walked that path side by side.

The night before, after her conversation with Shiho, Kaho had been thinking about what to wear for the occasion.

Then, suddenly realising that she was acting as if she was preparing for a date, she smiled wryly to herself.

In the end, she wore a denim skirt with a white knitted top and layered a moss-green cardigan over it.

She decided to take a lightweight jacket with her just in case.

At breakfast, the two sisters agreed that they would leave by 9.30 a.m. As soon as it was time, Kaho went to the front door and waited for Shiho. When she appeared, Kaho was utterly astonished by what her sister was wearing.

‘W-Why are you dressed in your school uniform?’

‘I’ve packed most of my clothes away.’

‘But not your uniform?’

‘Well, I will never wear this to college, will I?’

Shiho had made a valid point.

‘If you have an issue with it, shall I ask Tae-chan if I could borrow one of her outfits? If you’re okay to wait while I get changed, that is.’

‘That is the worst idea ever.’

‘Did I just hear my name?’ came their mother’s voice as she emerged from the back of the house.

She was wearing a black dress with a huge white lily on it.

For a second, it gave the illusion that something was about to swallow her up.

On her head was a headband covered in lace, sitting triumphantly like a seated passenger on a packed commuter train.

The sisters exchanged glances and silent words: She wasn’t wearing that this morning, was she? At least this one seems less flamboyant than some of her other outfits. They nodded at each other in agreement.

‘You’re going out, right? Wouldn’t you both like to wear something prettier?’

‘No thanks, Tae-chan, we’re good with what we’re wearing.’

As Kaho hurried out of the door, she noticed a large tote bag slung over Shiho’s shoulder. Aside from the jacket in her hand, all Kaho had with her was a small crossbody bag.

‘Watch out for cars!’ They heard their mother call out to them through the gap of the closing door.