Page 56

“Precisely. When we sleep, we are in a different state of consciousness. People who sleepwalk are in yet another state of consciousness. You were given a psychedelic that produced an altered state of consciousness. So these are all various states of consciousness.” Helen spread her hands.

“Death is merely another state of consciousness on the spectrum. It is the cessation of brain activity, but not of soul activity. In my experience, the soul lives as a consciousness, and some of us, like you and me, have the ability to access that consciousness. That is the essence of mediumship.”

“So did the psychedelic cause my seeing Caterina or communicating with my friend in a coma?”

“A fascinating question.” Helen’s eyes twinkled with interest. “I believe your gift predates the drug. However, microdosing psychedelics may open a neural pathway that preexisted, like widening a door that was already open. Science has yet to understand the effects of such drugs on the brain.”

“I guess we’ll know when I’m sure the drug is out of my system.”

“Not necessarily. Not if it opened a pathway or triggered a predisposition.”

Julia didn’t know whether to be horrified or happy. She didn’t know if she wanted the abilities or not.

Helen smiled warmly. “You’re perplexed, and I understand that. Your goal, such as it is, would be to understand, accept, and control your abilities, so that you can use them.”

“You mean contact the souls?”

“Yes, I could mentor you in your mediumship. I can give you instruction that can help you receive these souls. I also have books on the subject and exercises you can try at home. We can start right now.”

“Here?”

“Of course. I communicate with souls here all the time. I consider it a thin place.”

“What does that mean?”

“It’s an old Gaelic notion, close to my Irish heart. It began with the belief that there are places where the veil between the material and the spiritual world is thin. Those places traditionally exist in nature, but they can exist anywhere.”

“I don’t know if I want to do it,” Julia blurted out, nervous. “What would you do?”

“Let’s try something. You said you brought artifacts. Choose one for us to work with. Don’t think about it, just choose. Is there one that interests you, in particular?”

“Yes,” Julia answered, trying not to overthink.

“Please get it and hold it.”

Julia opened her purse and rummaged through the baggies with the hair, the passports, and the photographs. She slid out the photo of Patrizia’s broken arm, closed her purse, and held the photo. “Should I show it to you?”

“No. I’m not the medium, you are. Now close your eyes and focus on the picture.”

Julia did.

“We close our eyes because vision requires so much of the brain’s energy.

When vision is foreclosed, other senses come to the fore.

It’s why people reflexively close their eyes when smelling a flower or listening to music.

For us, it’s the first step in communicating with a soul, whether alive, dead, or somewhere else on the spectrum of consciousness. ”

Us? “Okay.”

“Now. Cleanse your mind of any thoughts but the picture. Focus only on that.”

Julia obeyed her, reproducing the image of baby Patrizia in her mind. She visualized the horrible swelling at the elbow, the dark bruising.

“Now, keep your focus and breathe deeply. Open your mind to your thoughts. Don’t force them to come to you. Rather, allow them.”

Julia kept thinking of the injured elbow. She tried to slow her breathing and allow whatever came.

“ Allow deeper.”

Suddenly Julia felt an agonizing pain in her elbow. Her eyes flew open. She jumped up, clutching her elbow, gasping. “Ow! My arm! My arm hurts!”

“Julia, look at me.” Helen rose, pointing to her eyes, a clear and steady blue. “Come back now.”

“Make it stop!” Julia kept her eyes on Helen. She could hear the huffing of her own breath. She cradled her arm. The pain in her elbow began to dissipate.

“Keep looking at me.”

Julia felt the pain ebb away, then vanish. “What just happened ? Was that what happened to my mother? Is she dead? Did she do that to me?”

“The only person who can answer those questions is you.”

“I don’t know the answer!” Julia shot back, uncomprehending.

“Please, sit down.” Helen gestured to the couch.

“I don’t want to sit down! I want to understand what just happened!”

“Sit down and I’ll explain,” Helen said calmly.

“I was just in pain! Have you seen anything like that?”

“Yes, it happened to me before I understood and accepted my gift. You have remarkable abilities.” Helen smiled. “I don’t have the answers. You will in time, if we go forward and work together.”

“It sounds like therapy.”

“It’s not, but it may be therapeutic for you.”

“I don’t know if I want to go forward.” Julia sat down. “I might just leave it alone. It hurts, for one thing.”

“I can help you with that, too.”

“Why did it happen?”

“I think the souls wish to communicate with you, and they just did, in a way you can no longer deny.”

Yikes. “What if I don’t want to communicate with them?”

“That is your choice,” Helen answered, with finality. “Have a think and call me if you wish to continue.”

Julia didn’t know what she wanted. Her thoughts were all over the place. “What if I’m not made for… mediumship?”

Helen met her eye with a knowing smile. “I believe that train’s already left the station, dear.”