Page 16 of The Sweet Spot (Kodiaks Hockey #3)

Chapter Sixteen

Wolseley

A fter making Brandon’s pregame meal, and one he could heat up after the game, I went back to Tangi and Ethan’s condo. I’d finally figured out the public transit system and found that a bus took me within a block of the condo, so I was now saving money instead of taking a million Ubers. I saved those rides for when I had to lug a ton of groceries.

As I showered and changed for tonight’s game, I stared back at my reflection in the mirror. My roots needed a touch-up, and the stylist I’d found two blocks away had done such an amazing job, that I planned to do it again, keeping the same colors. But something was missing.

I pulled out my meager makeup bag and put on just a hint of concealer, a bit of blush, mascara, and my favorite pale pink lip gloss. I rarely wore much makeup—my mom claimed I had perfect skin and didn’t need it—but today felt like the right day to splurge, and since all my vegan cosmetics cost a small fortune, I figured I should at least use them.

Next, I needed to pick an outfit. Normally, I had no issues with body positivity. I knew I wasn’t society’s version of perfect, but I liked my figure even though I rarely showed it off. Mostly because I liked my clothes and didn’t need to prove anything. But despite all that, being around women who were essentially what we were programmed to think were goddesses had me feeling self-conscious, and I hated that feeling. I much preferred not caring about makeup and clothes, but here I was, staring at what little I had brought to Vancouver and trying to come up with something that wouldn’t make me stick out like my hair would. I could already envision the stares.

After a long back-and-forth, I chose my best jeans that showed off a bit of my curves, a black blouse that I left a few buttons open on, and a matching black scarf in my hair. I’d gotten into the habit of wearing them, circa the 1970s. It would definitely hide my brown roots.

Since I’d never been to Graham Place, Jill picked me up, and we went together. We arrived early, so she showed me around her office, which was pretty sweet, with a gorgeous ocean view. I wondered how she got any work done. I’d be staring outside and wanting to meditate all day.

We then met Tangi in the team lounge, reserved for VIPs, WAGS, and other invited guests. When we got there, everyone seemed to know Jill and Tangi, and they introduced me to all the wives and girlfriends of the Kodiaks. Every single one of them looked at my hair, but none commented. Yes, hot pink stuck out in a crowd, but if I wanted to look like everyone else, I would. And I didn’t want to.

My clothes did seem to fit in … at least a little. Most of the WAGS were dressed up a lot more, but then again, I wasn’t one of them, so that didn’t bother me. But even though Tangi was in simple jeans and a V-neck sweater, she still looked like a million bucks. Maybe it was the baby glow. Jill, never one to conform or care, was also dressed casually in jeans and a sw eater. She looked like she’d just come off a fashion runway in Paris. I had tried so hard for my look, and at best, I was cute. The story of my life.

“We figure we’ll hang out here after the game for drinks with the guys. Jeremy is going to ask Brandon along,” Jill said.

This day was looking up.

Tangi glanced at her watch. “We should head down to our seats.”

We had great seats at center ice about twenty rows up. The guys had gotten them for us. I’d watched a few games since getting all Brandon’s hockey instruction, but I’d never been to one, and seeing the players on the ice, warming up, excited all the kids. I looked for Brandon, and there he was, number twenty-seven, taking shots on the goalie and skating leisurely around the ice. I suddenly envisioned him topless and wiped the image from my head.

“I might be taking on Ryan as a client part-time,” I said. “He and Brandon were talking about it, and we are going to work something out. While I’d love to work with both of them, full-time, there is no way I could swing it. So we are going to try a system where I make twice as much of evening dishes that Ryan can pick up or I can have delivered.”

“That’s great,” Jill said. “And Ryan is already looking better. He’s made huge strides. See, I was right about him all along.”

“Congrats! Who needs a restaurant?” Tangi said.

I froze for a moment. I know Tangi didn’t realize it, but it was such an insensitive thing to say. My life’s dream had been to open my own restaurant, and now my best friend was blowing that off. As if being a personal chef should have been my goal all along. I would have expected Jill to say something like that, but coming from Tangi, it hurt.

Jill picked up on the tension because she said, “Your restaurant was amazing. And some day soon, you’re going to have that again.”

I bit my lower lip to keep from getting emotional. Jill was never the sappy one. I reached out and squeezed her hand in thanks. At that moment, Tangi realized her error.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way,” she said. “I’m blaming baby brain. I just meant that you could look forward and not back. You know what, I’ll just shut up.”

“Good idea,” Jill said.

Brandon had mentioned earlier that the last preseason game meant that most of the regulars started, so it was no surprise to see Jeremy, Ethan, and Brandon on the ice. I kept my eye on Brandon, and he was pretty damn good, scoring a goal in the second period. I couldn’t skate, so I had no expertise in the area, but he was so graceful about it, not as bumbling as someone like Ryan, but maybe that was due to his size.

After the game, we headed up to the team lounge, where Jill and I ordered drinks, and Tangi ordered a sparkling water. We perused the menu and ordered fries, meatless nachos, and a salad to share while we waited for the guys. Jill said it usually took them about an hour and a half to come by. There were postgame interviews, a team meeting, cooldown, followed by showers.

“I know you guys have been wondering about wedding details,” Jill said, piling fries and nachos onto her plate. “We decided on a small destination wedding in Italy. Lake Como, to be exact.”

“That sounds amazing! When?” Tangi asked.

“Seeing as you are pregnant, mid-August. We’ve picked this amazing estate to rent for two weeks. It has twelve bedrooms, so enough for all the important people in our lives. We’ve also planned to rent rooms for the rest of our guests, but we’d like to keep the guest list under a hundred. Preferably around seventy-five.”

I was doing the math in my head, which Tangi seemed to be doing as well.

“I’m guessing his close family, some teammates, your friends, and that’s it?”

“Correct. Nice and small. If I had my way, it would be us, Jeremy, and his immediate family, but I lost that battle.”

“And your mom?” I asked, sipping my wine.

Jill sighed. “I don’t want any argument from either one of you, especially you, Wolseley. I’m not inviting her. And I plan to tell her she’s not invited.”

I tried not to frown because I wanted Jill to reconcile with her mother. I wanted everyone to have their happy endings, and I’d always felt that you could make a relationship work if you tried hard enough, but after knowing Jill for more than half my life and seeing what a toxic mother she had, I was rethinking all that now. But not inviting her to her wedding?

“Let me say only one thing. Will you regret the fact that you didn’t invite her?”

Jill didn’t hesitate. “No. I’ve given her enough chances to be a good mother. I can’t let her toxicity affect me anymore.”

Tangi reached over to pat Jill’s hand. “I think you’ve made the right decision.”

Deep down, I knew that too. But I still wanted Jill’s mother to be a decent human, and I wondered if that stemmed from the fact I didn’t know my birth parents. Then again, my adoptive parents were amazing, and being adopted by them was the best thing that happened to me and my brother.

We were almost finished our meal when Jill made a grand observation. “You know, you’re looking supercute today. I spy some makeup, and your outfit is perfect. What’s up?”

I tried so hard not to blush, mostly because I was terrible with compliments. “I knew this place was a stage, so I stepped up my game.”

Jill’s blue eyes seemed to see right through that. “Doesn’t hurt that Brandon is pretty hot.”

“Oh, stop,” I said, fighting a losing battle with the flush now heating my whole face and neck. “I see him every day. Why would I dress up for him?”

“If I had to rate guys on the team for overall hotness, he would rank second after Jeremy,” Jill added. “He’s got the looks, the bod, and the brood takes him over the top.”

“What about Ethan?” Tangi said with a mock pout.

“A distant third. I still haven’t forgiven him for screwing up those three years with you.”

“I refuse to objectify the guys,” I said.

“Leave that to me,” Jill said. “What secrets do you know about him?”

She was insufferable. She loved knowing things, although she was good at keeping secrets … most of the time. “If I knew any, I wouldn’t tell you.”

“What’s he look like with no shirt on?”

I gasped a little and nearly choked on a fry. I had to wash it down with some water. “How do you know I’ve seen him with no shirt?”

Jill’s face lit up. “You have! Tell me!”

“No,” I said, suddenly feeling hot all over. Did someone turn up the heat because I was sweating?

Jill narrowed her gaze. “You have a thing for him. It’s obvious. I don’t blame you. Like I said, he ranks number two on the team for overall hotness.”

“I do not have a thing for him!”

“What do you think, Tang?”

Tangi smiled and nodded, but something about the look on her face seemed strained. “I think you’re right. ”

“He’s single,” Jill said in a singsong voice. “And you’re single.”

“Would you stop!”

“Ethan would die. Can you imagine the three of us as couples with Brandon being part of that?” Jill said. “He would lose his mind.”

I put up my hand to stop her, trying not to laugh. “He’s my boss. Nothing more.”

“Besides, Wolseley is so not his type.”

The moment the words left Tangi’s lips, a dark cloud fell over the table. Jill and I stared at her, and it took Tangi too many seconds to realize how callous her statement was. The smile on my face vanished in an instant.

“I didn’t mean it that way,” she said, pain etching her face. “I meant that he’s got a type.”

“Keep stepping in it, Tang,” Jill said, unimpressed.

Tangi covered her face with her hands while her words twisted a knife in my gut.

“I really am making a mess of this,” Tangi said. She took a deep breath and looked at me. “Wols, I don’t want you to waste your time on him. I’m only saying this because I don’t want you to get hurt. Getting your hopes up about him isn’t a good idea.”

I suddenly felt anger I’d never felt before directed at Tangi. “Why don’t you tell me specifically what is wrong with me?”

Jill groaned, and Tangi bit her lip. If my friend wanted to spare me future pain, I needed to hear all my deficiencies.

“Nothing is wrong with you,” she said gently. “I haven’t seen his exes, but I think he’d find you maybe a little too quirky.”

I closed my eyes and tried to keep my emotions in check. Quirky was code for unpretty.

“I really think you should stop,” Jill said to Tangi.

“No. I want to hear it all,” I said, choking back my anger. “ Could it be because I don’t have a killer bod? That I dye my hair different colors all the time? That I’m an activist for things like climate change, a women’s right to choose, and the right to health care? I’m just too radical, not drop-dead gorgeous, and too quirky?”

“I’m sorry, Wols. I didn’t mean to offend you.”

She looked sorry, and maybe deep down she was, but she wasn’t wrong. I also saw pity, and that was just too much.

“I forgot one thing,” I said. “I’m also not you.”

“Wols, don’t get upset over this. It’s stupid,” Jill said.

I shook my head, fighting back tears. “ I get it. And look, this isn’t even about Brandon. I’m not pining away for him. It’s about me and not being perfect enough for this,” I said, pointing to everyone in the room. “I’m not good enough.”

I grabbed my purse and slapped some money on the table. I had no idea if it was enough to cover my meal, but I was too upset to make sense of anything. I mumbled a goodbye and hurried out.