Page 42 of The Starlit Ring (The Chronicles of Liridin #1)

Minutes passed. Tears burned at the corners of my eyes, and I wiped them away furiously.

Eventually, I found the grounding sensation that radiated from the marble and let it travel from the soles of my feet to the top of my head.

I drew in the quiet calm again, and tried to clear my mind, focusing only on the energy around me, pulling it to the surface.

I felt like I was weaving a tapestry, grasping each thread, maneuvering them this way and that.

Even the starlight became a lace of spider silk and silver.

And then there came a stirring, a soft grunt.

I lost my grip on everything and blinked back to reality.

Marius sat up slowly, gave a low hiss, and pinched the bridge of his nose.

With bated breath, I waited. Exhaustion settled in my bones. My head pounded, and I was dreadfully thirsty. I wanted nothing more than to crawl through the passage, and sleep in one of the armchairs at the library. I doubted I could’ve dragged myself back to the servants’ quarters if I’d wanted to.

“Arina?” he mumbled, blinking at me with unfocused eyes. Had he fallen asleep ?

“Yes, Your Highness?”

“Ugh,” he said. “None of that. I don’t want that.” He frowned down at his knees, massaging his forehead. “It’s always you. Why is it always you?”

I froze. “What do you mean?”

Marius rose unsteadily to his feet. I thought his legs might collapse like a newborn fawn’s, but he braced himself against the altar and inhaled sharply. “I meant what I said. I always see you.”

“I work closely with your betrothed,” I reminded him, trying to keep my voice even. Should I be concerned? Should I go to him?

“That’s not what I meant,” he said. “I always See you, Arina.”

Oh. The magnitude of his words hit me like a punch to the stomach. “What do you mean?”

What had he Seen? Did he know my secret? Did he suspect?

Another part of me jumped at the words. He’d Seen me. That meant I mattered in some way, that I was more than an insignificant maid.

“You’re always a part of my visions,” he said, finally pulling his hand from his face. “Always there in the background with me. I can’t see anything I’m looking for because you’re always there.”

“Oh,” I whispered. “Am I blocking you?”

“Something like that.” A scowl. “It doesn’t make sense,” he said.

I didn’t want to ask for any more information. I didn’t want to know why I was in his visions. “What are you trying to See, if I may ask?”

“A path forward. A solution to the problem of… the ring.”

“The ring,” I repeated, thinking of the awful bone band, the empty prongs where a stone should be. But what about the fallen messengers? Didn’t he want to pursue that, too? “I… I don’t understand.”

“You wouldn’t,” said Prince Marius. “It’s a secret. A terrible one I am bound to keep.” He sat gingerly on the altar and watched me with something like regret.

I pondered this as I moved to sit on the stone floor. If it was truly a secret, then there was little I could do. I tapped my finger on my knee. Finally, I said, “What about the messengers?”

A scowl. “I’m afraid I’ve already tried for days. There’s nothing, absolutely nothing that comes to me. I thought it might be best to change trajectory for the time being.”

“Alright.” I nodded, more to myself than to Marius. “How can I help?”

He gestured at the room around us. “This.”

“There must be something more,” I insisted, afraid that he’d soon realize my skills were subpar. Unless he had another use for me, he’d send me away. I didn’t know if I could stand the rejection.

When he looked at me, it was with hunger. My face heated. Was I misinterpreting this?

“I’m afraid that’s all I require,” he said, and turned away.

That’s it?! No, there must be something else for me to do. Anything. “I think—I think my presence might have ruined your visions. Shouldn’t you ask someone else for help?”

“This was something of an experiment,” Marius admitted, plucking a loose thread from his sleeve, and scowling at it.

“I’ve Seen you before, even when you weren’t here.

I thought that might change if you accompanied me.

Alas.” His expression was one of regret, and…

was that mischief? Was he entertained by all of this?

I adjusted my skirts around me. How would he react if I bared my legs? Let him catch a glimpse of more than an ankle or a wrist?

But those were lecherous thoughts that I wouldn’t dare explore. Not so far from home, with few allies, and the weight of my lies on my back. “Why am I in your visions?” I asked, gritting my teeth in frustration. “It doesn’t make sense.”

Prince Marius shrugged miserably. “It doesn’t. And yet.”

“And yet,” I echoed. I took a deep breath, fought against the panic welling in my heart. “What do you see? ”

A long silence. He looked anywhere but my face. Finally, with a wobbly smile, he said, “You. Everywhere.”

My pulse quickened. “And what am I doing?”

“That’s just it. Nothing of import. You’re sleeping, or eating, or riding. Just normal things.” He raked his fingers through his hair, gave a frustrated sigh. “It took me a while to recognize you.”

I froze. He knew about my hair. “What do you mean?”

“That first night, I thought you looked familiar. I couldn’t place you. Then I realized where I’d seen your face.” He plucked a loose thread from his sleeve. “Forgive my intrigue, but I’ve no idea why you’re in my visions.”

Hands balled into tense fists, I said, “I can’t imagine why.”

We sat in silence, looking anywhere but each other.

“May I be frank?” His voice cut through the silence, knife-sharp and determined.

I nodded, and tugged at the hem of my skirt. When he sounded like that, I was half-afraid of what he might say.

“I am far more attracted to you than I am the Princess.”

I jerked to attention, agog.

“I did warn you I meant to be blunt,” he said, a hint of mirth tilting the corners of his mouth. “Is it really so shocking?”

“I—” But words failed me. I could only gape at him.

“If you wish me to stop, tell me, and we’ll never speak of it again.”

I felt naked under the intensity of his gaze. How could eyes so icy have such fire in them? “I—I think I’d like an explanation,” I choked.

Marius considered this. “Perhaps I could’ve been blunter,” he said, faintly amused by my expression. “I fear that an inadequate explanation will leave you with the wrong impression.”

I wanted to throttle him. For all that he beguiled me, he was sometimes too courtly, too theatrical.

While he might’ve captivated an audience in a theater or the throne room, he had only succeeded in driving me halfway to madness.

“Please explain,” I ground out. My hands shook where they clutched at my skirts.

“I have been mystified and intrigued by you since the first day,” said Prince Marius, squaring his shoulders, and meeting my eye with such intensity that I shivered.

“I was surprised to learn of a stowaway. Even more so to discover that the stowaway was, in fact, a maid. I must admit that you caught my attention.” He huffed a little laugh.

“And kept it. Once I realized that I’d Seen you, I—I felt that I needed to know more.

It became a game, a little mystery to solve.

” His eyes narrowed. “You intrigued me. And I despised it.”

That was the reason I kept running into him. It felt like he was following me because he was following me. I didn’t hate it as much as I would’ve expected to, even as a little shiver ran through me. “And now?”

He shook his head, gave a forlorn little smile. “Now I find that days without you are dull and dreary. I always want to be around you, even if it is ‘improper.’” He scowled at the flagged stone floor. When he turned to me, his gaze had grown hot. “Everything that I want with you is improper.”

My heart thundered in my chest. “I don’t want to be your mistress,” I said, but that was a lie. I would’ve given him anything he wanted if he kept looking at me like that—warm, devastated, unbearably fond.

“That is more than understandable,” he said softly. “I won’t mention it again.” His grimace was brief, pained.

An ache settled in my breast. A terrible thrum, like the relentless drums of an encroaching army. The only man I’d ever wanted had just confessed his feelings for me, and I’d rejected him. A wave of grief overcame me, souring my stomach.

I couldn’t do this to Ria. I couldn’t do it to myself. Any affair we had would be just that—an affair. Sooner or later, it would end. Possibly in bloodshed.

But I wanted him. All of him. A visceral craving, a carnal desire to touch and be touched.

I longed to see him smile, to see his mussed hair in the morning, to grasp his hand and know that at least for now, he was mine.

I wanted to feel his heart beating against mine, feel his hand in my hair.

I wanted to know more about his visions.

I wanted to make him a sword that would strike true, a dagger that would turn flesh to ice as it penetrated. I wanted?—

I wanted everything. I wanted the arguments, the passion, the adoration.

But I would never be his. I would be a secret, tucked away like poison in a cupboard.

“Wait,” I said, chest heaving, hands shaking. “Wait. I—I don’t know if I want that, either.”

He regarded me silently, studying my face. Finally, he said, “You don’t have to make any decisions right now. We can discuss this later.”

I nodded, afraid to speak. If I said the wrong thing, the illusion would implode. Reality would settle around us like dust, and we’d go our separate ways. I couldn’t bear the thought.

“Is there anything I should know?” he said, gently prodding.

“Aren’t you the Seer?”

“That’s not how it works,” he scoffed, but I glimpsed the mirth in his eyes. “I’ve Seen almost nothing of you.”

I was equal parts reassured and disappointed. A part of me wanted to hear that he’d Seen us together, that we might have some sort of future. Another knew that it was better not to consider this at all.