Page 53

“ Amara.”

The broken plea replays in my mind for hours.

It was easy enough to find a car with keys still in the ignition, harder to find one that would start. The first car took me as far as Evanswood, then I walked until I found another. The second car took me to the outskirts of the city, and the final one to the door of the AIA. The daemons that braved the sunlight were easy to kill, my anger fuelling every move, the sound of their flesh sizzling giving me satisfaction.

I didn’t care about attracting attention anymore. All I knew was that I needed to get back to the city. Back to the AIA. Back to Xavier.

Xavier, the director of the AIA, my friend, my family.

There’s so much that he needs to know about the war. If nothing else, I need to be with someone I trust. Though will he still be that person to me when he finds out the truth? If I am who they think I am, perhaps Xavier will drive his dagger through my chest before I can turn into a monster like the rest of them.

I’d happily let him do so.

The sound of Nathaniel’s body crumpling to the ground plays over and over again, guilt nagging at my conscience. I left him there to bleed to death.

No, not death. He’s an archangel. He will heal.

The days we spent together feel like a dream, the version of him that I came to know and respect shadowed by the truth. It was all a lie, a means to an end.

I shared things with him that I had never shared with anyone, felt closer to him than I’d felt to anyone. I called him my friend. I laugh at the thought. What a fool I’ve been.

I feel more of a fool for falling for the archangel’s deceit than I do for Jeremiah’s charade. He manipulated my mind; he cast shadows over my thoughts until they no longer belonged to me. I have something to blame for falling for his lie.

With the archangel, I have no one to blame but myself. My own twisted fantasy that the leader of Aetheria and a human soldier could be anything more than enemies.

You’re not human.

That pesky voice in the back of my mind continues to harass me. To add fuel to the fire of the lies that the archangel spun.

An image of a beautiful woman with golden hair flashes through my mind. She smiles down at me with love in her eyes.

Your mother.

The memory Nathaniel fed me has haunted me ever since, but I refuse to take note of it. I refuse to face the voice in my head that tells me the truth. That voice is not welcome here, thank you very much. It’s my brain, and I reserve the right to refuse service to anyone. This brain is closed for business today.

Ever since I stepped out that door, I’ve felt myself come closer and closer to breaking point. With each passing day the vault of my emotions has threatened to burst, to crush me from the inside out. At the warehouse, I was close. As Jeremiah’s lies unravelled before me, I felt pain unlike anything I’d ever felt before. The only thing that held me together, that is still keeping me in one piece, is the anger that overtook it.

I should’ve known that they were both liars. I should’ve seen through the facade. I wonder how I never noticed even a single crack in my relationship. How did I never see anything unusual?

I mean, for worlds’ sake, Jeremy had no friends, no family. I knew next to nothing about his job. The man was a giant walking question mark. Why did that not seem like a red flag to me?

Oh, I know! Because he told my mind to not to question it, so I didn’t.

For two years I thought I was falling in love with this man, but that’s exactly what it was. A thought, fed to me by the man who pulled my strings.

Even if it is true, even if I am the archangels’ daughter, does it make it all worth it? The heartbreak, the betrayal – does that make it okay?

Despite driving most of the way, it takes me nearly the whole day to reach the AIA. As soon as I step foot back in the city, the atmosphere changes completely. People fill the streets, the familiar rush that occurs near sunset everyday.

A week ago, this would’ve seemed normal to me. I would’ve thought that if they made it home in time, they’d be safe. Now, it seems naive and absurd that people are just living their lives. That we’ve just accepted this new reality. That we just stopped fighting.

I cross my fingers that I’m able to catch Xavier before he heads home for the day.

I run for the agency’s doors, noting that no one walks out of them. Every other road is full of people making their commute home from work, but not here. The street is empty, the doors of the AIA not having opened once.

A familiar feeling of dread twists in my stomach.

The glass on the front door has been shattered completely, the floor beneath it covered with shards. My stomach drops.

A note is taped to the frame that remains.

You should’ve come willingly.

I’ll let your friend live in exchange for your surrender.

Follow the bodies and you’ll find me.

—Cain