Page 5

Xavier and I eat lunch in silence for what is likely the first time in our entire friendship. I contemplate whether to tell him what I found, or whether I should wait until I have more answers. Perhaps I can still find where the angel took Angela.

If I tell him, it will break his heart, even though it’ll come as no surprise. I hate telling him bad news; he always looks like I’ve kicked a puppy. If I don’t tell him, that’s twice today that I’ll have kept something from him.

“Earth to Amara – are you listening to me?”

I didn’t even notice him breaking the silence. “Of course. You know I have a razor-sharp attention span,”

I say, grinning and picking up the discarded sub from my plate.

Xavier lets out a laugh, a full-on from-the-belly laugh. I’m only slightly offended. “Yeah, we both know that’s not your strong suit.”

He’s not wrong. Hence, field agent.

My smile fades and I’m dragged back under by my thoughts. I can’t lie to him again.

“I found footage of Angela being taken by an angel.”

Xavier’s sigh is heavy and full of grief. He shakes his head and refuses to meet my eyes.

“This isn’t just any angel, Xavier. His wings were made of blades instead of feathers. It isn’t natural. It’s like he was made in a lab.”

I thought we had seen it all over the past years. Daemons, angels, the natural disasters they caused upon arrival. Now, a feeling has settled inside me that we’ve only scratched the surface. We know next to nothing about the creatures of the other worlds, or what worlds they came from. Is heaven real? Is hell?

If angels really are creatures of heaven, it’s certainly not the heaven we ever envisioned.

Xavier seems to be thinking the same thing as he sits in uncharacteristic silence.

“I couldn’t find any other footage of him,”

I go on. “It was like he just disappeared. I’m sorry, X.”

Xavier shrugs and flashes me a lopsided grin, as if I just told him I can’t make it to dinner, but it doesn’t quite meet his eyes. There’s a look in them that I’ve seen time and time again. When he lost his mother. When Archer was found dead in his apartment. When he was offered the job as director because no one else wanted the death sentence that came along with it.

“We should have a sleepover this weekend,”

I say. “Seventeen margaritas and a pizza each and we can pass out, just like the good old days. Jeremy can sleep on the couch.”

I wink, taking a large bite of my sub.

Xavier chuckles. “How about you sleep on the couch and I’ll sleep with Jeremy?”

I kick his shin under the table, wiping the smile clean off his face.

“Ouch! Bitch.”

We spend the rest of lunch talking about anything other than work. If only to give ourselves one last moment of normalcy before our lives change for the worse. I devour my meatball sub as Xavier watches me with disgust. His mouth hangs open, his brows reaching for his hairline. As if he could be remotely surprised by anything I do these days.

“You’re disgusting. You eat like a pig. I hope you at least chew with your mouth closed in front of Jeremy.”

“You should eat in front of a mirror and see yourself before you talk.”

I’ll be the first to admit, not my best comeback.

Layla lowers herself into the seat next to me, nothing more than an apple on her plate. She barely acknowledges us as she sits. Her eyes stare off into the distance, her hands tremoring ever so slightly at her sides.

“You fought well this morning, Layla.”

I watch her closely, noticing the way she almost flinches at her name being spoken.

Her eyes dart between Xavier and me before she takes a deep breath and forces a smile onto her face. “Thank you. Though never quite as good as the two of you.”

Xavier’s smirk grows, and my eyes roll back into my head at the sight of his ever-growing ego. “You have to stop giving him compliments, or one day I swear that pretty head of his will explode.”

Layla can’t really help it, though; it’s just who she is. She’s sweet, she’s kind, she’s compassionate. She’s likely to die in the field.

It’s a realisation that dawns on her as quickly as it does me. I know it by the vacant look that casts over her eyes.

“Layla, you know you can talk to us.”

I nudge her gently, trying to mimic the sweetness that I’m so used to from her.

Her eyes widen at me, then they fixate on Xavier. “They’re going to make us go out there, aren’t they?”

Xavier takes in a sharp breath, his brow softening with pity before he answers. “Yes.”

Her eyes fall, but her weary smile stays as she says, “I’m going to die.”

She doesn’t give me a moment to lie to her before she cuts me off. “No, Amara, we all know that I will. I don’t want to kill. I don’t want to end a life. Human or not, I don’t think I can do it. You both are such brave, fearless fighters. You both have a chance to survive. Not me… I’d let myself die before I was able to take another life. I’ve been fooling myself otherwise for a year now.”

I fall silent, struggling to find the words to make it okay. There aren’t any, really. There’s not much I could say to change the truth. “Layla, we won’t let anything happen to you. You’re our friend, our teammate. We will protect you.”

I don’t want them to be lies; I truly want to believe that we could. But there is no protection against the creatures of the other worlds. There is only distraction. Delay. Then death.

If you’re lucky, you can run long enough to hide – but hide from one monster, be found by another.

“No, no, you have to protect yourselves. I don’t want anyone to die worrying about my own inability to keep myself alive.”

“You should leave.”

Xavier’s words snap my eyes to his. “Leave the AIA before the announcement. If you leave beforehand, they can’t force you to fight. You can go back to being a medic. You will be safe.”

My brows pull together and pity etches itself onto my features before I can stop it. If Layla quits before the announcement, they will know why. They will know Xavier told her that we were going back into the field. He’d likely be fired. “X…”

“No, Amara, I’m serious.”

He turns to Layla and says it as an order. “I want your resignation by the end of the day.”

“Xavier, I…”

Layla stammers, seeming horrified by the prospect of deceiving the agency. The agency that wants to send her to her death.

“Are you saying no to a direct order? That’s it. You’re fired.”

She looks at him as if he’s joking, though there’s no humour in his tone and certainly no hint of amusement on his face.

“Xavier!”

Layla almost screeches his name, as if she’s half worried that he’s serious and half hoping that he is.

“Xavier, you could get fired for this…”

I say the words softly, if only to make sure he knows the consequences. I want Layla to live as much as he does. I want to believe that he’s doing the right thing. I just want to be sure that he looks after himself as much as he does others – something he often forgets to do.

“I’m going to die soon anyway,”

he says. “I may as well lose my job saving someone I care about before I do.”

My heart squeezes, and I almost hug him in that moment. My friend, the protector, as always.

“Layla, just listen to me. You are bound for so much more than to die because of your compassion. If you stay, that is what will happen. So go. Leave. Be happy.”

Layla takes a deep breath, closing her eyes and muttering a thank you. When she opens them again, the vacant look that has been shadowing her since this morning is gone, replaced by gratitude and fondness. “You know I never would have lasted this long at the agency if it wasn’t for the two of you. As hard as you both pretend to be, you’re much more like me than you know.”

As sweet a sentiment as it is, I can’t help but hope that she’s wrong – because if she’s not, neither of us will survive the week.