Page 16 of The Royal Flame (The Royal Academy #3)

CHAPTER

MADDISON

I ’m so pissed off I can’t stop moving around my room.

Sure, I sort of understand why River did what he did—dude’s a martyr through and through.

But that doesn’t make it any easier for me to deal with.

I like River, a freaking ton. Obviously.

But I also don’t want to beg a guy to stay with me, and this is like the third time he tried to bail out over our barely planted relationship.

The woman I believed was my mother would’ve cried and pleaded with him to stay, but I don’t want to be that. I want to be strong. I want to be the sort of girl that can be okay with being by herself, which is what I’ve done for most of my life, so I should be okay for now.

But then why is it so complicated to breath?

I press the hell of my hand to my chest where my heart is racing way to swiftly for what I’m doing, which is slowly pacing the room. I’m upset and anxious. I need to focus on going to class, putting one foot in front of the other.

“You can do this, Maddy,” I tell myself as I make my way over to the closet to grab on outfit to wear today.

Class begins in an hour. So I have one hour to get my shit together.

I pull on a pair of wide-legged jeans and a crop top T-shirt before combing my hair and dabbing on a bit of lip-gloss and eyeliner.

I haven’t eaten much today, so I grab my wallet and head out to get some food from the cafeteria.

Lily is sitting in the living room when I exit my room with a book opened up on her lap.

The instant I exit my bedroom, her attention snaps to me.

“What happened?” she asks as she tosses her book aside and stands up.

I shrug. “River and I are no longer an thing.”

Her shoulders slump. “Maddy, I’m so sorry, but I know he didn’t mean it. River just thinks he has to protect everyone. It’s what he’s done all of his life and old patterns are hard to break.”

She doesn’t know the entire story, and I can’t tell her. If I do, it could put her at risk for getting pulled into this mess that is my life right now.

“I know, but I’m not about to beg him to stay. I’ve tried to convince him to, but I can’t keep doing that.” I offer her a small smile when she studies me with worry. “I’ll be okay.” I start for the door, hoping for a quick escape because smiling right now feels agonizing.

“Maddy, wait,” she calls out.

Dammit .

I suck in a slow breath before gradually turning around. “I really am okay.”

“I don’t believe that, but that’s not what this is about.” She walks toward me. “Were you still planning on working for that party planning event company my mom set you up with. I know she’s not around right now, but the owner asked me if you were.”

I’d completely forgot about that, which is out of character for me.

“Yeah, of course.” I face her. “Did she say anything else?”

She nods. “She wants you to text her. I guess she tried to get ahold of you, but you didn’t answer.”

“My phone hasn’t been working very well,” I tell her. Not a total lie.

The society stole it and then Noah had it for a while. And I haven’t really been on top of reading my messages.

“I’ll text her while I’m eating m the cafeteria.” I add, shifting my weight. It feels like I need to say something about her mom. We haven’t really talked about it since we left her place and she’s been relatively quiet. “How are you doing with everything?”

She shrugs. “Okay, I guess. I mean, I know my mom is probably okay, since she told me she’d be. But it still stresses me out that I haven’t heard from her.”

“Did she tell you she’d message you?”

“No… She didn’t really tell me much other than she’d be okay.

But I still wish she’d at least send me a message.

” She blows out an exhale. “I don’t know how I’m supposed to do this; just go on doing my daily stuff when I don’t know if she’s one hundred percent okay.

” She shifts her weight from one foot to another. “Your aunt’s missing too, right?”

I nod, part of me wishing I could tell her the truth about who Ellie really is. “Yeah, she didn’t necessarily disappear, though. She kind of took off, I guess. I have no clue where, and I’m worried.”

“I’m sorry.” Her expression conveys empathy. “Are you looking for her?”

“I am.” I tread cautiously. “River was actually supposed to help me with a few things today, but now that we’re no longer a couple, I doubt he will.”

“Maddy, just give him some time,” she starts to defend him.

While I get it—River is her brother—I don’t want to deal with this right now.

I check my watch—the one River gave me— ugh . “I need to go eat before I have to get to class. I’ll see you later, okay?” I walk out the door before she can respond.

The instant I step foot into the hallway, I internally cringe as the handful of people roaming around turn to stare at me. Then the whispering starts.

I adjust the handle of my bag and attempt to ignore it as I hurry down the hallway toward the cafeteria. I’m somewhat used to being stared at here, but this is an entirely new level.

Something’s off.

As that thought crosses my mind, Eli appears in my line of vision. He’s a ways down the hallway, lazily leaning against a column. When he spots me, he pushes off of it and mosey toward me.

“Maddison,” he greets me with a smirk. “I heard a rumor about you this morning.”

My muscles ravel into knots. “Cool. I’m sure it was extra juicy for you.” I sidestep to swing around him, but he matches my move and blocks my path.

My eyes narrow. “Dude, you don’t want to mess with me. Your little clique may have got a hold of me once, but only because you guys jumped me from behind and drugged me. But right now, I’m totally aware of the situation, and I promise you I fight north side.

He laughs. “Is that supposed to scare me?”

I smile sweetly at him. Maybe I shouldn’t taunt him, but I’m in a foul mood. “It shouldn’t, you preppy little pretentious brat, because my guess is by the loafers that you’re wearing, that you’ve never actually gotten into a real fight.”

His nostrils flare. “You want to find out?”

I drop my bag and make a fist. “Sure. Give it your best shot?” Deep down. I’m aware I may not win this fight.

But I’m so damn tired.

Of fighting.

Of being afraid.

Of feeling alone and broken.

If I hit him, though, I’ll probably get expelled. And then what? Where would I go? Home? I don’t have a home or family anymore.

I’m about to lower my fist when he says, “Go ahead and hit me. I’ll come at you way worse.” He leans in and says lowly, “Now that River has used and discarded you, you’re fair game, Maddison. You should ask Lily about how it turns out when you spread your legs for a Royal?—”

I slam my fist into his jawline with so much force it pops my knuckles.

“Dammit,” Eli and I both groan out in pain.

I clutch my hand while Eli cradles his face.

“You’re so done,” he warns with a glare. “I’m going to destroy you.”

With that, he spins around and storms off. A ways down the hallway, he veers right and rushes into the Main Office.

Great. Dude’s about to tattle on me.

I’ll get kicked out for this—I know I will.

It feels like the walls are closing in. I can’t breathe. Think.

“I need to get out of here.” I spin around and jog out of the school.

As I push out the exit doors, I keep going, running across the grass, the parking lot, and then pick up my pace as I reach the road that leads away from the academy.

In the back of my mind, I’m aware of the risk I’m taking, and that Grey’s bodyguard will probably try to chase me down. But that only makes me run fast.

When I hear a car engine behind me, I skitter to the right and jump into the tree and shrubbery that border the road. I swat through branches, hiking deeper into the trees. I can’t hear anyone running after me, but I keep going until I brink through the edge of the forest line.

Miraculously, I manage to exit it relatively close to the bus stop.

I spot a bus pulling up and I move quickly, barreling on it.

I take a seat toward the back and look out the window.

Standing on the street corner where I was only a minute ago is a man dressed in a dark suit and glasses—the bodyguard Grey has keeping an eye on me.

He has his hand shielded over his eyes and is peering around.

As the bus drives forward, his head darts in the direction.

I’m not sure if he figures out I’m on it, but with how hard he stares at the back of it, I’m guessing he’s trying to read the information on the nest stop that flows across the marquee.

I didn’t even bother to check, and when I finally glance at the inside marque, I cringe.

This bus is headed to the downtown area of Royal City.

I slump back in the set. The leather reeks of cigarettes and body odor.

It’s disgusting, but familiar. It makes me think of all the times I’ve spent on the bus, riding to places in north side.

And at times, I’d get on it at night when my parents parties would get too out of hand, and I didn’t feel safe.

I’d ride around until the sun rose then make my way home where tons of people would be passed out on the floor.

I once thought one of them was dead with the way their eyes were open. But they were just high out of their mind and had grabbed me when I leaned over them to check if they were breathing.

I’d screamed and kicked them in the side to get them to release me. Then I ran and got on the bus again. That wasn’t the first time stuff like that happened, and I became accustomed to it.

But I genuinely did believe that when I got a scholarship to the Royal Academy, my life would change, and I’d finally be able to stop hiding on the bust, yet here I am riding on the bus again.

That depressing thought sinks deeply into my bones as I gaze out the window, watching the lavish houses and fancy buildings blur by. Nothing will ever change. I really am starting to believe that, so maybe it doesn’t matter if I get expelled for punching Eli?

Maybe my life was never meant to change.

Maybe this is my own Social Darwinism hell.

I wonder if the person who gave me the scholarship and paid for me to attend will be disappointed when they find out about my expulsion?

I still have no clue who they are. I’d guess Grey, but since he wasn’t aware of my existence until just barely, I doubt it. And I know it isn’t River.

Could it be my aunt Ellie? Did she somehow come across some money to pay for it? She does have royal blood running through her veins. It might be nearly extinct blood, but perhaps she received some inheritances money? Is that how she managed to vanish?

Yeah, I think I might be living in Na?ve Land. Because how does that play a role in River’s mother’s disappearance? Because there has to be a connection.

River and I were supposed to be looking into that today—we were supposed to be talking to people that could be in the Rose Society Elli and his mother are in. But that’s not happening now. Not after River dumped my ass.

Tears burn in my eyes. I loathe that I feel this way. I use to be much stronger, but now I feel so broken.

A tear manages to escape my eye, and I quickly swipe it away right as my phone buzzes from inside my pocket.

I fish it out and am unsure what to make of the side of River’s name flashing across the screen.

I send the call to voicemail then power down my phone, along with the watch I’m wearing that he uses to track my location.

Then I sink lower into the seat and get comfortable. This is where I belong, away from fancy schools and rich, gorgeous guys who have an obsession with being a martyr.

Maybe I’ll just stay here forever because it’s where I belong.