Page 41 of The Other Side of Paradise

She laughed. “Sorry, maybe that’s too heterosexual. I guess you wouldn’t get any opportunities to do that.”

“I mean, there’s, like… you know… uh, fake ones.”

“Oh, like a strap-on. I guess. Have you ever ridden one like that?”

“N-no…”

“You should try it,” she said, nudging my side. “Or maybe you’re too much of a bottom. Have you tried it at all?”

“What, taking a… a strap?”

“Yeah.”

Aside from how I was going to use a dildo tonight and think things I shouldn’t about Stella, “No…”

“What, really? I guess I don’t know how lesbians typically do it anyway.”

“I mean.” I put my hands over my face. I was spending a lot of time today like that. “However they want, really, in general. But in my experience it tends to be a lot of, you know… like… ugh… hands… mouths…”

“Maybe your hot island hookup will want to wear one. Experience everything, you know?” She winked, and I didn’t know if I was going to die of embarrassment or arousal. Probably both at once.

“Um… m-maybe. I assume you’ll, uh, ask, if that does happen.”

“No, because you’lltellme if she does. Obviously. The second it’s done. Hell, if you wanted to tell me while it’s happening, I’d love to cheer for you, be like,yes girl, get yours.”

“I… wouldn’t do that, but thanks for the offer…”

“What position would you want to do? If you wouldn’t want to be on top.”

“Do I have to answer this question?”

“Uh, yeah. Go on.”

Fuck me, I wish she hadn’t said that thing about howit’s your instruction,making this whole thing feel like we were having some kind of meta-sexual experience right now. I felt my face burning molten hot, but I said, “Um… I mean… I guess, I know it’s basic and all, but, uh, you know, m…” I mouthedmissionary,and she lit up.

“Oh, yeah. For the eye contact.”

“Oh, god. Yes.”

“That’s hot. Sometimes the classics are classics for a reason, you know?”

“Right. Yep.” What did she mean,that’s hot?She thought me taking a girl’s strap in missionary position was hot?

“I cannot wait for you to have your praise-kink missionary eye contact dreams come true.”

“I’m gonna need another drink if we’re going to continue this conversation.”

She winked, nudging my side. “Or you could continue it with Jessica…”

Jesus Christ, the amount I wanted to talk to Jessica right now, I couldnotquantify how small it was. I wanted to go home and masturbate on a dildo while gasping Stella’s name and then feel terrible afterwards about having done it. But maybe I’d get a chance to breathe and reset my mind if I was somewhere Stella wasn’t. Maybe I’d just go up to the car real quick and breathe.

Or maybe I’d go masturbate in it thinking about Stella and get a head start on that. I was absolutely, resolutelynotthe type to do that.

“Right… yeah. Maybe I’ll go talk to her again. Butjustto chat. Asfriends.I’m not remotely interested.”

“Uh-huh. Well, it looks like Ryan’s finally come back,” she said, standing up, “so I’ll go bug her for a bit. But this has been agreatchat. Very enlightening.”

“Yeah… very enlightened now.”