Page 46 of The Most Unusual Haunting of Edgar Lovejoy

Jamie glanced at Edgar to see he was watching them intently.

“I hadn’t been in love at the time. But now, um, I know she was right.

And what better way to be around someone all the time than to pledge forever to them?

Emma, I’m so glad you found someone you want to make your life with every day.

” A chorus of aww s and murmurs of assent came from up and down the table.

“And,” they concluded, “I do think Dave is the wiser choice—even though he doesn’t have much hair to smell. ”

Dave ran his hand over his buzz cut and grinned, color high on his cheeks. His groomsmen pounded him on the back.

“Because I think Nathan Jones ended up playing hockey in Canada, and you could not deal with the weather up there.” They held up their glass to gratifying chuckles. “So congratulations, Emma and Dave. I wish you all the happiness in the world together.”

They quaffed their champagne and sat down to a chorus of cheers and congratulations. Edgar slid a hand onto their thigh and squeezed. When Jamie looked up, Edgar’s warm brown eyes burned intensely, and Jamie felt an answering warmth burning just as bright inside.

***

After dinner, people moved more freely, making the rounds to socialize, and Jamie hoped they’d be able to make a break for it soon.

Edgar was starting to get the wild-eyed look that beset him after too much social interaction, and Jamie was exhausted.

They glanced at their watch. It was close to nine.

Surely things couldn’t go on too much longer?

Then someone wheeled out the dessert table.

Speeches from another bridesmaid and groomsman, and then Emma took the microphone.

On the table amid platters of desserts was a large covered platter.

Emma removed the dome to reveal a cake, and cheers erupted from Dave and the groomsmen.

At first, Jamie couldn’t tell what it was supposed to be, but finally they realized it was a set of golf clubs.

“I’ll save the mushy stuff for Saturday,” Emma said.

“Wouldn’t want to accidentally show people how much you like your husband,” Jamie joked, bumping shoulders with Edgar.

Edgar didn’t respond, and Jamie had a moment to think grudgingly, You’re right. I guess I shouldn’t audibly make fun of Emma at her own wedding event. But then they looked up. Edgar was looking at something over Jamie’s shoulder, and he looked terrified.

“Baby, it’s okay,” Jamie said. “I’m here. I won’t leave you.”

“I need to…” Edgar pushed his seat out slowly, but his trembling made the chair scrape against the flagstone floor.

Emma stopped whatever she’d been saying about golf, and everyone turned to look at them. Jamie tried desperately to tap into any lingering sibling frequency to communicate to Emma that she should keep talking and distract everyone from Edgar.

“Are you okay?” Emma said into the microphone instead.

Jamie gave a nothing-to-see-here wave and slid their arm around Edgar’s waist, supporting him upright. Murmurs arose around them, and Jamie could feel their mother’s eyes on their back.

Edgar was shaking violently, and as soon as they pushed the doors open, he pressed his back into the wall, slid into a crouch, and curled up tightly, covering his face.

Jamie wrapped their body around him, holding him, as he took deep, shuddering breaths.

His hair was wet with sweat, and Jamie rubbed knots out of his clenched shoulders until slowly he began to relax.

“Fuck, Jamie,” he said as soon as he could speak. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t you dare be sorry for that,” Jamie said fiercely.

Edgar buried his face in Jamie’s neck. “I just wanted one night,” Edgar said softly, and Jamie could hear his exhaustion, his mortification.

“Just one night where they’d leave me alone and I could be a normal boyfriend.

Someone you could bring as the date to your sister’s wedding and meet your parents, and not… ”

He sighed.

“Do you want to tell me about it?” Jamie asked.

“No, I just… I’m sorry, I just really wanna go home.”

“Of course, let’s go home.”

Edgar shook his head. “Stay. I’m gonna ask Poe to come get me.”

“I want to come with you. Make sure you’re okay.”

Edgar kissed them, and Jamie tasted salt. “Don’t leave in the middle; you’ll freak out your family. Go smooth things over with them. Have some cake.”

Jamie snorted. “It’s probably pretty good cake.”

Edgar held up his phone. “Poe’s coming.”

“Okay. I’ll walk you out.”

Jamie helped Edgar up, and they walked slowly down the hallway to the exit.

Outside, the wind was cool, and a sharp crescent moon rose above the trees. Edgar tipped his head to the sky and sucked in a deep breath. Jamie stroked his back. He’d sweated all the way through his coat.

“I don’t suppose…” Edgar said.

“Hmm?”

“That your family will ever give me another chance?”

“If they don’t, then they’re not people you wanna have in your life anyway,” Jamie said fiercely.

Tires crunched the gravel in the roundabout, and Poe’s truck pulled up.

“What did your weird family do to my brother?” Poe asked, then cackled to himself.

“Thanks for coming,” Jamie said.

“Eh, I was out anyway. Bones will only sleep in the car seat this week,” he explained.

Jamie opened the door for Edgar and saw Nour asleep in the back seat. Jamie patted Edgar’s chest and kissed him gently. Then, from the corner of their eye, they saw a small furry white kitten head pop out of the middle of Poe’s chest.

“Oh my god,” Jamie said. They kissed Edgar again. “I feel good releasing you into these capable paws.”

Edgar looked into their eyes for the first time since they’d left the dinner. “Will I see you later?” he asked hesitantly.

Jamie smiled. “Definitely.”

***

Inside, the cake had been served and the champagne cleared, and things seemed to be winding down.

Dave’s contingent was leaving for a bar, and Emma’s was going back to the hotel, where they were preparing a spa night for Emma.

Dave’s mother and Jamie’s dad appeared to be settling up with the caterers.

Jamie headed for the dessert table before it was wheeled away, giving the area where Edgar had seen the ghost a wide berth.

They took a piece of cake with part of a white golf ball of frosting. The frosting was grainy with sugar and too sweet, but the chocolate cake was rich and moist, and Jamie commended Edgar’s judgment.

They managed to avoid their mother while everyone said their goodbyes, at the cost of getting caught in a conversation about mortgage lending with Dave’s mom. But the second everyone had filed out, Blythe rounded on Jamie.

“Honey, please.” She sounded concerned. Jamie had anticipated anger and hadn’t prepared for this approach. “That man seems kind, but he is clearly not a suitable partner for you.”

“Why is that, Mom?” Jamie asked through gritted teeth.

Their father joined the conversation, drying his hands as he approached. “He’s clearly unstable,” Hank answered. “Come on, sweetie. You don’t—”

“He was falling down drunk at your sister’s wedding,” Blythe finally exploded.

“He wasn’t drunk, and he’s not unstable,” Jamie said. But of course, they didn’t have any other explanation. So they decided to leave it at that. “Did Emma leave already?” they asked instead.

“Listen, dear,” Blythe said, toying with their tie. “Don’t bring him on Saturday, please. It’s not about me or you. It’s about your sister. Let’s make sure she has a perfect day.”

And how many other people have to suffer in order for that to happen?

Rage boiled over, and things that Jamie had never been able to say on their own behalf flowed from their mouth as they defended Edgar.

Kind, gentle, sweet Edgar who always fucking tried his best, even to his own detriment.

Who was always thinking about Jamie, even while having a panic attack.

Who’d welcomed Jamie with open arms into his heart and into a family just as complicated as their own but far more generous.

Who’d insisted on coming as their date tonight, even though Jamie had warned him repeatedly that it would be a drag.

And who was now, as a result, being speculated about by people who didn’t even know him.

“Not one time did either of you ask if my boyfriend is okay. You thought he had a problem with alcohol, and you recognized he has an anxiety disorder, both things that mean someone needs help. But neither of you care about helping anyone.”

Jamie broke off. They had seen what they needed to see. Jamie had spent so long feeling like their parents hadn’t truly valued and respected them. They’d spent so long wanting to gain their respect, to convince them via excellence to reevaluate their opinions and beliefs.

But now Jamie realized that need was gone.

They didn’t want the approval of people they didn’t respect.

They didn’t want to be well thought of by people whose judgment they didn’t agree with.

And they didn’t want to constantly put themself in the position of shoving down great swathes of themself so that those people could feel more comfortable.

In fact, now that they could see this clearly, there was a shift—like their entire being took two steps to the side—and Jamie couldn’t believe they’d held back this long.

Blythe’s mouth was pinched, generally a sign she was thinking about how to annihilate the enemy, but Jamie didn’t care. What could she say to them that they hadn’t felt every instant they spent in her presence?